


Role Reversal

by jesterlady



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Canon, Alternate Ending, Angst and Humor, Betrayal, Canon Het Relationship, Canon Rewrite, Character Death, F/M, Multi, POV First Person, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-14
Updated: 2011-10-14
Packaged: 2017-10-24 14:34:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 54,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/264588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jesterlady/pseuds/jesterlady
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rewrite of BTVS S3 where Angel doesn't come back from hell, Faith and Buffy were BFF, Willow/Xander never happened, and Spike and Dru make a deal with Buffy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: In Which Spike and Dru Make a Decision Whilst Being Gross

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Depending on which version of the end you read, there is major character death!  
> Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy. Some lines are from the show. My wonderful banner was made by spikeshunny from LJ.
> 
> [   
> ](http://pics.livejournal.com/jesterladyfic/pic/0000ps8k/)

“I’m very cross with you, Spike. Turning tables all over.”

“I’m a mite cross with you, too, pet. More than turning tables, you were.”

“Didn’t you have fun, my William?”

“Fun, watching Angel prance all over you and you taking every bit of it? That could hardly be fun for me, Dru, and it was not good either.”

Drusilla’s shoulders slumped as she turned toward him.

“I’m supposed to be bad, aren’t I? That’s what they told me. That’s what sings in the air when I go outside. Did I do it wrong?”

She began to whimper softly.

Spike was at her side in an instant, holding her and crooning quietly.

“There, there, love. Don’t worry, you got being evil down to a tee. I’m sorry.” She began to quiet down, stroking his cheek with her sharpened fingernails. “There’s just a difference, Dru, between being evil and being unfaithful. Do you understand that?”

Drusilla’s eyes brightened.

“You mean to see you only?”

“Exactly that, pet. You love me, don’t you?” His voice shook a little.

“Why, of course. I chose you to be mine because I could see you. You tasted like lemons.”

Spike shook his head, frustrated with her ramblings.

“Then let me be yours. No more fooling around.”

“Fooling like a bumblebee,” she laughed. “I’ll be good, Spike. Good and evil like I’m supposed to. Like they told me to.”

“Good, cause when we get back to Sunnyhell, I don’t want any of this ‘my Angel’ nonsense. We’re doing this for you, Dru.”

She smiled and kissed him passionately.

“Oh no, Spike, this is for you.” He melted under her touch and she whispered, “Make me strong, dear heart. We’ll be one forever.”


	2. In Which I Monologue

My life the past few months had been unusual, which, for me, is to say it’d been rather normal. All the things that happened, just part and parcel of the whole Buffy experience. Demon slavers, zombies, vampires so old and ugly you have to drive a four by four through their heart to kill them, Mr. Hyde wannabes trying to impress their girlfriends, monsters from everywhere competing over who gets to kill me, candy that turned my mom into a Giles-making-out-with teenager and crazy, evil ex-Watchers. Like I said, completely normal.

Not to say it was all slaying and roses. Life had been hard for awhile. It started back when my arch enemy walked up to me, said ‘hello, cutie,’ and offered to help me stop my boyfriend from destroying the world. And he did. But in the process I lost my boyfriend; in fact, I had to kill him. It royally sucked. So I ran away. The real kicker was that running away never works out and I had to come back.

That’s where the past few months came in. I had never felt so alone in my life, and, for my life, that’s saying a lot. I had friends, good friends, my mom loved me, Snyder even let me back into school, but it just wasn’t enough. Something inside me had been torn to shreds and I didn’t think it would ever be healed.

My friends tried to help, but they just didn’t understand. Despite the awkwardness we went through when I first came back, Willow and I had re-bonded over a bout of name-calling, but she was busy with her life. Studying magic, being with Oz and doing her homework, of course.

Xander and Cordelia, there’s a creepy thought, spent all their time making out in broom closets or in her snazzy car she liked to talk about so much.

Giles, anxious to help and bless his British ever-loving heart, could do no more than offer me tea and make me train harder.

Mom didn’t understand any of it; she didn’t even accept the fact that my life was real most of the time.

But guess what? Life sometimes hands you a break. Most of my complaints in life have to deal with being alone. That’s what I was told being the Slayer was anyway. But because I apparently refuse to do things the normal way, this got a bit screwed up and now there are two of us. Faith the Vampire Slayer, my new best friend. I needed her so much; you have no idea what she meant to me or how much she helped me. She knew what it meant to be alone, even without being the Slayer and we could share anything. We were going to go to Homecoming together and she even totally busted my loser rebound boyfriend who dumped me right before the dance.

She was a bit on the wild side, no mistake. Xander’s mouth dropped open and Cordelia slapped him every time Faith walked by. She ate that right up. She'd had a harder life than I have had. And she was always running away. Except for one time, she didn’t. Faith had come to town running from a horrendously ugly vampire that could give the Master a run for his money in the Miss America Gross and Scary Looking Pageant. Kakistos had killed her Watcher and was bent on killing her too and she was scared. But she managed to kill him; she managed to face her fears. You’ve no idea the kind of courage that gave me.

That wasn’t the only thing she was running from though. Apparently wooden stakes don’t just kill vampires, but humans as well. Faith found that out the hard way.

It had always scared me how much power I wielded, but not her. Faith ran with the power, she gloried in the power, and that’s where the trouble started. She hadn’t meant to kill anyone, but her impulsiveness caused her to anyway. She did feel horrible about it. But, for some reason, while I would’ve been on my way to the police station to turn myself in, she believed because she was a Slayer she had certain privileges. That she was better and the rules didn’t apply to her.

All this had happened before she came to Sunnydale, so we both had thought the past was behind us and we sister Slayers, the Chosen Two, could move through life unafraid of anything. But the past had only been lurking beneath the surface, ready to devour Faith.

It had always been my belief that when you stake a vampire, if he’s only a fledgling that is, you just stake him. I played around with the vamps sure, punning my little puns, but I wouldn’t stand there and punch one senseless for the fun of it.

Faith liked the hunt, the kill, the power. She felt she had to work harder to prove herself against me. We were friends, we were both Slayers, but I had been there first and these were my friends, not hers. Never mind the fact that we’d all accepted her immediately, that I had been closer to her than everyone, even Willow, Faith felt she had to run to catch up with me. And in some ways, she was right. I had been doing it longer, I did have a better handle on it, but that was no reason to turn traitor on me.

Yup, that’s what she did. It started when her new Watcher, whom she trusted, turned out to be evil and tried to kill us all. We knew and Faith didn’t, she wouldn’t believe us, and Faith tried to help Miss Psycho until she turned on her. After that, Faith built up walls and didn’t trust anyone. She thought we’d been holding out on her the whole time about crazy Watcher Lady and hadn’t told her till the last possible second. So Faith switched sides on me.

See, the Mayor of Sunnydale turned out to be evil; I guess we all should’ve known. Kind of a duh moment really, when we figured it out. He’d started hiring hit vampires to take out Faith and I when I caught him delivering a tribute of babies to a sewer monster, but when Faith took in her second human kill, she went to him. She’d killed his pet vampire, Mr. Trick, and wanted to replace him. He took her in and then my best friend, who helped me survive, turned officially to the evil side of the game and while she didn’t actively try to kill me, probably wouldn’t be adverse to it.

Why is it that whenever one of the good guys turns evil Spike shows up to even the balance or something by helping me out?


	3. In Which a Truce is Made and Vampires Try to Kill Me—What You Expected Something Novel?

Spike pulled the Desoto up onto Crawford Street and swung into the garage of the mansion. This was a great credit to his driving seeing as Drusilla was practically sitting on his lap at the time. They got out of the car and Spike carried in Drusilla’s dolls and clothes, then returned to her, scooped her up in his arms and brought her inside.

“Angel has gone all away,” she murmured to herself. “Nothing left but ashes, ashes.”

“Slayer got him then. Way it looked, he was about take out his first Slayer. But she’s a tough bird,” Spike said. “Best Slayer I ever fought.” He grinned in remembrance.

Drusilla shivered and wrapped her arms around herself. She moved over to the couch and lay down on it. Spike knelt at her side.

“Cold, love? Still feeling weak?”

She grinned suddenly and laughed.

“No, not weak. Strong and ready to frolic. Do you want to frolic, Spike?” She beckoned to him with a long, curved finger. His lips turned up into a smile and slowly, starting at the end of the couch, crawled up her length and curled his tongue against his teeth before sinking down to kiss her throat. Her hands rose to caress his hair and she gasped as he found a tender spot.

“We’ll play till tomorrow. Business burns up the pleasure, Spike. But my love will find his way.”

Spike lifted his head a moment and looked into her eyes.

“I take it you mean we’ll see the Slayer tomorrow and tonight’s all ours?” She nodded and raked her nails along his chest. “Then, baby, let’s get some playing in before bedtime.” Spike lowered his head once more and captured her mouth in a searing kiss, her delighted laughter ringing out between their joined lips.

***

Faith waited impatiently before a closed door with the Mayor’s hands over her eyes.

“Can I look now? I’m growing roots here, boss.”

“Now, now, Faith. A little patience never hurt anybody. I just want to be sure it’s perfect for you. The best for my Faith.”

After a few more minutes, he removed his hands and gestured her inside a magnificent apartment, adorned perfectly to her tastes.

“Dude, this is awesome.” Faith slowly turned around, taking in her surroundings. She felt an odd choking sensation at the back of her throat, but forced it aside. “Breaking out the big bucks, huh, boss?” She sidled up to him and he smiled at her indulgently.

“You’re doing tremendous work here; it’s my job to properly reward my employees and to punish them when their work ethic falls. I want your strict promise, though, that you’ll keep this place tidy. None of this mess and wild partying kids seem to enjoy nowadays.” He shook his finger at her firmly and she rolled her eyes at him.

“I’ll try,” she finally said.

He smiled brightly.

“That’s my girl. Excuse me,” he added as his cell phone began to ring, “Hello?” He listened for several minutes before chuckling. “That character. Always up to something. No, we can’t afford that now. Right. Language, Alan. Okay, send a committee to deal with it. Bye, bye now.” The Mayor hung up the phone and turned back to Faith who had started jumping on the bed. “Off right now, young lady. Decorum is a virtue, you know.” When she complied, albeit reluctantly, he continued, “Well, it seems we have a Spike problem. We don’t want him rocking the boat this close to the Ascension. I’ve sent a committee to take care of him.”

“That vamp B’s always on about?” Faith asked. He nodded. “Send me. He’ll be dust in seconds.”

“While I do appreciate your enthusiasm, I think we’ll just wait awhile to unveil your talents, what do you say?” When she started to pout, he tried again. “Come on, smile that pretty smile. I know a certain young lady with a Play station in her room.” Faith brightened and leapt across the room to the bedroom. The Mayor shook his head and laughed before following her.

 

***

I put away the jump rope and prepared to go home. Mom had called at least three times to talk about colleges, though for the last hour the phone had stayed mercifully silent. Giles was off on his mysterious retreat and the rest of the gang was on their glamorous bowling date. Times like these, I really missed Angel or heck, even Faith. While she might not be tall, mysterious and brooding, she was at least someone who understood me and whom I could talk to when the gang was all out making with the smoochies.

I cursed my thankfulness about the phone’s silence when I entered my kitchen to find Spike sitting at the kitchen counter drinking hot chocolate with my mother. Grabbing his shoulder, I spun him around to slam into the cupboard and brought the stake I’d snatched from my back pocket down toward his heart.

Spike kicked it aside, even in such close quarters and jumped to the other side of the kitchen, keeping the counter between us. Despite really hating him at that moment, I had to admit, the guy had moves.

“You know, Slayer, you really ought to have that Watcher of yours remind you that when you come into a home and find a vamp there not eating, it’s probably not for death and mayhem reasons that he’s there.” Spike lifted his hands in a gesture of peace. As if. “Just wanna talk. If I wanted to go all Angel on you, your mum would be digesting rather nicely about now. We had quite a nice chat really, after I got over the axe thing.”

I glared at him, but I was tired and felt my defenses fall. I sagged against the counter after making sure Mom was on this side of it with me and not near the bloodsucking fiend I should be staking right about now.

“What do you want this time, Spike? Drusilla run off again? Want me to hunt her down for you?”

“Thanks awfully, but I’m a much better hunter than you, Slayer. This is about Dru. But, matter of fact; she’s all cozy and not quite warm, waiting for me.”

I closed my eyes in irritation. I’d forgotten how Spike would dance around an issue forever if let be. This peace talk of ours had better go quick or he was dust. What was I thinking, he should be dust anyway.

“Okay, I’m tired and more than a little stake-happy right now. If you have a point, get to it quickly before I decide to lend you one in the heart area.”

Spike grinned, obviously not intimidated in the least. Dang, I must be losing my touch.

“Let’s all sit, shall we, and pretend to be civilized playmates?”

I nodded and we went into the dining room, sitting at opposite ends with me holding my stake at the ready.

“Mom, go upstairs where it’s safer, okay?” She started to argue, how typical, but I insisted and finally she went upstairs and I felt better knowing the only vamp who could come inside was sitting in the same room with me. “So, Spike. To what do we owe this pleasure?” Sarcasm dripped from my voice. Oh yeah, I still had it.

Spike leaned back luxuriously in his chair.

“We need each other’s help again. You've got a rogue Slayer on your hands and no muscled, love-struck puppy to help you out. And I need that big brain of yours and his library.”

“Something wrong with Her Wackiness again?”

“Dru,” he emphasized, “is having trouble feeding recently. She’s lost none of her abilities, but actually biting humans seems to be right out. Some little run in with gypsies. Them and their vampire spells. Ironic, don’t you think?”

“Still not seeing why I’m caring,” I replied flatly. Drusilla was not my favorite vampire.

Spike leaned back and rested his arms behind his head.

“Well, pet, just this reason. I’ll put myself at your disposal for however long it takes to take down this baddie and the bad sister Slayer while Watcher-man digs through those musty old books of his and finds a cure for Dru. I’d just steal one again, but you’d probably come and bollocks it all up and I don’t fancy myself in a wheelchair anymore.”

“How can I trust you?” I asked the obvious question.

“How can you trust anybody, luv? I personally guarantee that I’m on your side till this thing blows over. No hurting you or your mates without warning and only when we’re done and I’ll keep Dru in line. You won’t be sniping behind my back and skimping on the research, deal?”

I thought hard. I really did. As much as I hated to admit it, I needed his help. The vampires were getting out of control, spurred on by Faith and the Mayor’s need for silencing me about his night time activities in the sewers. With the babies. Did I mention that?

The vamps knew my patrol schedules, routes; they were even learning my moves, dang it. I needed fresh blood bad and for some reason, my instincts knew I could trust Spike to keep his word. That didn’t mean we hated each other any less. But it must have cost him to come to me. Well, at least somebody else was miserable.

“Deal.” I broke my silence. “But the instant you or her step out of line you’ll be dead quicker than you can blink and I can pun over your dust.”

“Right, right.” Spike waved all that aside. He was so irritating! I mean, I just threatened his unlife, hello. “So, let’s get researching, Slayer. Ain’t got all night.”

“Giles is on a retreat. He’ll be back tomorrow.”

“Watcher types and their bloody retreats,” he muttered to himself. “Well, his stuff’s not gone. It’ll be easier to do this at night for us combustible types, yeah? So, let’s grab Dru and get to the library and start looking. You can show me your weapons and junk and fill me in on the sitch here.”

I reluctantly agreed. All I wanted was to sleep and forget that this peroxide pest existed.

Mom got that look on her face when I told her I had to go out, like she thought I was going to run away again, but at least she hadn’t ordered me to stay home this time. I promised to explain everything later, kissing her goodbye as Spike and I left.

“One more thing, Slayer,” Spike told me as we headed out the door and thankfully, out of my mother’s earshot, “I promised my Princess I’d kill you this time when it was over. And I always keep my promises, pet.” Perfect, like I needed someone else trying to kill me.

 

***

“The mansion? You couldn’t have laired up somewhere else?” I asked Spike as he opened the door for me and got a glare for his pains. Observe my cunning disdain.

“Well, I always preferred the factory, but, you know, burnt up.”

“That wasn’t my fault!” I protested.

Spike grinned.

“I know.” He turned toward the garden. “Darling, I’m home. Brought a guest for you to play nice with.”

Drusilla slinked inside, wiping her mouth with one hand and glowing with a vitality Spike seemed surprised to see. Maybe the freaky chick had been on the point of death and recovered. Too bad. She hissed at the sight of me, I kept my Slayer cool, but she went to Spike and wrapped her arms around him.

“It’s no fun when they don’t dance, Spike.”

“I know, pet.” He kissed her hand. “But the Slayer here and I are going to take you to work on that. So come on.”

“Can’t ever get where the traps won’t take you,” she sang to herself, following him.

He glanced back at her thoughtfully, or as thoughtful as Spike can be. I don’t think there’s much going on above his mouth. Well, maybe he knew something I didn’t, then again, maybe I’m just paranoid. Hey, comes with the territory. Disgusted by all the vampire affection, I followed them warily.

 

***

 

Spike and Drusilla sauntered down the street, their arms wrapped around each other. I followed, alternating between wanting to gag and wishing Angel were here. Grumbling to myself, I sighed as Drusilla stopped and started giggling and dancing.

“Can’t you control her?” I asked Spike sharply.

“No wish to, pet. Love it when she does this.” Spike worshipfully put his hand on Drusilla’s shoulder. “What is it, Dru? Do you see something?”

She grasped his hand eagerly.

“It’s there, Spike. Do you remember? Writhing and screaming and full tummies, all right there.” Drusilla pointed to a bench. Wow, she got a lot from just that bench. All I could see was metal and wood arranged in a cunning arrangement just right for sitting.

“Oh, I get it,” he explained to me. As if I wanted to know. “We killed a homeless man on this bench. He screamed for mercy, but you know, that only made her bite harder.” Spike laughed at the memory. I just stared at him and wondered what in the world I was doing with two vampires in the middle of the night and not staking them.

“Can we just go?” I finally asked and interrupted Spike’s passionate nuzzling of Drusilla’s throat.

“Oh, right. Let’s go, my lamb, Slayer’s in a hurry.”

“Nasty sunshine,” Drusilla spat, “makes playtime go all away.” I rather liked being compared to sunshine.

Spike took her hand and led her after retreating me.

“Promise you some real playtime later, sweet.”

Drusilla’s face brightened.

“With the branding iron?” she questioned.

He laughed low in his throat.

“Anything you want, baby.”

And though I did not have vampire hearing, I still heard that. Isn’t my life the perkiest?

We were just outside the magic shop when the vampires showed up. I had been waiting for this, really I had. At least it provided an outlet for my energy, since I wasn’t allowed to kill the two vamps I was with, and it stopped them from groping each other.

The lead vampire walked up to us all big and macho and explained his errand. You know, I’d probably be dead right now if vampires didn’t always have to have a big exposition scene before we fight.

“Spike, you should’ve stayed gone.”

Spike chuckled and took in the vampire before him.

“Lenny, long time no see. Wish it’d been longer; you’ve really let yourself go.”

I had to agree with his assessment. Lenny looked like a reject from _What Corpse_ magazine.

“Can we just fight or something?” I asked, anxious to get this night over with. “Cause I don’t know about you guys, but I got a quota to fill.”

Drusilla had been standing quietly by Spike with her eyes closed and her hands lifted, but all of a sudden she opened those creepy eyes and hissed.

“Yes, work and play. Mummy’s anxious to have a round.”

And she seriously leapt forward like a cat and stuck those fingernails of hers into Lenny’s eyes. Even I winced; I would not want those sharp things in my eyes, or anywhere near me for that matter.

Lenny shrieked like a baby and backhanded her. I’m guessing he shouldn’t have done that because Spike erupted like a panther on the prowl and twisted his head off. The other vampires came to life, (not literally!), and attacked us.

We fought for awhile. Spike had jumped on top of a nearby car and started tossing vamps off it. Drusilla flitted over to a nearby trash can and delicately bashed it over the vampires’ heads. I jumped into the Espresso Pump and grabbed a mop, using it to dust everything dead in sight.

The vamps surrounded us after a bit; there were a lot of them. Somehow this gave me some encouragement over my decision about Spike. If the Mayor wanted him dead this badly, then he probably would be a good ally. After my entire world had been turned upside down by this realization, I staked some vampires.

They backed us into the magic shop entrance and Spike guarded my back while I kicked the door open. We crowded in and barricaded the door but they would get in eventually. I broke off the legs of a chair to use as stakes and handed one to each of them.

“I’m so excited!” Drusilla cried. “I love skipping through the blood.”

“Me too, pet,” Spike said and grabbed the back of her head and smacked her one heavy on the lips. While we were in dire peril. Well, peril anyway. Give me a break. Thankfully, just then, some vamps came in through the back door. Spike dusted the first and I the second. We slammed shut the door and shoved a bookcase in front of it. Spike and I turned around and saw Drusilla actually dancing with the third vampire. He had his hands on her waist and everything. I think they were waltzing. Spike got this grin on his face like he knew what was coming next. I had the sinking feeling that soon I would know too.

Drusilla closed her eyes and hummed the nameless tune to their song and the vampire swayed with his eyes shut as well. Drusilla got up close to his neck and opened her eyes and whispered.

“Wakey, wakey. Time for little boys to get their deeds.” She had morphed very early on in the fight and now, as the vamp opened his eyes in expectation, she sank her fangs into his neck and bit hard. The vampire opened his mouth and screamed. I had never heard a sound like that before and I hope never to again. The girl had serious bite. And just when I thought it was over, Drusilla got out all ten of her claws and asked the whimpering vamp,

“What is in your head, my sweet? Let me see.”

Then she stuck her fingernails in his head. I had had enough. Pushing Drusilla away, I staked the vampire and readied for the next assault, snapping at her,

“Thanks for the help, but we kill them, not play around in their brains like a wave pool.” She started moaning but the vampires broke down the door then and we had to fight. Thank God.

There were about fifteen left and roughly we got about five each. I didn’t watch to see how Drusilla disposed of hers, but I think it was more expedient than her last one because she was done before I was. Spike and I staked our last vampires back to back. Drusilla floated over to us and patted me on the head like a dog. In fact, she even said,

“Good dog.”

I almost staked her then and there, but Spike pulled her out of my reach and instead, I assessed my physical status.

I was breathing hard. The stupid vampires I was aligned with didn’t have that problem, so they had no issues with groping each other like they hadn’t seen each other in weeks. I knew this from somewhere: big sweaty fights get vampires all hot and bothered and ready to do it, no matter who they’re in front of. In a totally twisted way, I suddenly missed Angel again.

“Okay, new rule,” I said, breaking into yet another make out session. “All time spent working together will be spent working together and not trying to kill me by eww-factor.”

“Your show, Slayer,” Spike told me, breaking away from Drusilla but somehow managing to convey a sexual heat so strong I felt it across the shop. I need a new life.

We finally made it to the library. Drusilla immediately hovered over to the weapons and started hyperventilating over them. I think she was imagining all the carnage she could wreak with them. From the look on Spike’s face, he knew that was what she was imagining and he wanted to as well. Ewww. He must’ve seen the look on my face, because he immediately started in on me, like he always does. Die, stupid vampire, die.

“What are you looking at, Slayer? Does it annoy you to see us enjoying ourselves? Come on, you know you loved it. I can smell it on you.” There we go again with the creepy vampire smelling. “You love the rush as much as we do and you only wish old Angel were here so you could enjoy it with him. Get the two of you all googly-eyed again. No matter what it might entail.”

I rushed to contradict this obviously insane notion despite the fact that this really annoying vampire was saying everything that had just been running through my brain.

“Angel’s dead. He’s dead because we made a bad decision. Now you think I want to make it again just cause you and Morticia get off on fighting? If Angel were here, we’d just be friends. Because we can’t be anything more.”

Never mind the way a voice in my head is singing, ‘liar, liar, pants on fire.’ Spike froze as I said this. It impacted me strangely. I’d never seen him so still.

“You’re not friends,” he said finally. “You’ll never be friends. Just like me and Dru could never be friends. We’ll fight and we’ll shag and we’ll hate each other till it makes us quiver, but we’ll never be friends.” He got really animated then, it was scary. “Love isn’t brains, you child, it’s blood! Blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be Love’s Bitch, but at least I’m man enough to admit it.”

Something I will never admit is the way he affected me just then with those words. They ran straight into my core and reverberated through my body. Why did he always know the truth? Why couldn’t I run around with my head in the sand? Why did I have to be the one who made the hard decisions?

He stared at me and I stared back and for one moment we understood each other. We were enemies, make no doubt about it. But we had the same darkness inside and our difference lay in the way we wielded it. We’d never be friends either. But we could do what we had to and respect the other for it until the time came again to take up our positions against each other.

Unseen by either of us, Drusilla had come up behind him and raked her fingers through his hair, growling,

“Mine!” into his throat. You can have him, crazy lady.

The look of fiery intensity on his face melted into absolute surrender as he turned to her and replied.

“Always.”

Their shared eye contact was intense too. Didn’t this guy know how to be casual? Drusilla was purring and she stuck out her tongue and licked the hollow of his throat and then moved it up his neck until she reached his lips where she outlined them, making them glisten with her saliva. Spike moaned. And I realized that sounded like I was writing a porn novel, so I broke it up.

“Be gross on your own time,” I reminded them firmly.

Spike sighed, but picked Drusilla up and carried her to the table where he whispered to her quietly for awhile and pulled out a…doll? from his duster pocket and handed it to her. It was kinda sweet actually, until she started pulling its hair out. Spike came back over to me and suggested we start working. I heartily agreed with him. Just so long as I could get some sleep, like soon.


	4. In Which British Guys Run My Life

The three of us worked until the sun was nearly up. I use the term, the three of us, lightly because Drusilla didn’t do anything but babble meaninglessly and Spike mostly cooed over her. He did read a lot of manuscripts. I admit he can be dedicated when he wants to be. They left before daybreak and I settled in for two hours sleep before Giles arrived. I was just glad it wasn’t Oz’s time of the month. Thank God I had superpowers or I couldn’t handle getting three hours of sleep a night on a regular basis.

Giles arrived smack on the dot at seven thirty. I think it must be against the law in England to be late. He expressed some properly repressed surprise upon seeing me there that early. I really couldn’t blame him. I don’t think it had ever happened before and hopefully wouldn’t ever again. Before I could politely ask him how the Stuffy Old British Guys Retreat had gone, he started being all concerned on me.

“Buffy, is everything all right? Nothing untoward happened on patrol, I trust?”

I shook my head with a perkiness I didn’t feel and replied.

“No end of the world stuff. Just normal things like Spike wanting our help and the Mayor trying to kill us.”

Giles did a double take. I really loved to startle him. Gave some purpose to my life other than saving the world and keeping a passing grade in chemistry.

“Spike did what?”

“Spike and Drusilla breezed into town last night and offered to help with Faith in exchange for some research to help Drusilla feed again. Gypsy curse.”

“And you believed them? Buffy, I must stress the importance of the consequences that could result from this. The town is in a critical state right now with the Mayor and to trust Spike of all people could be disastrous, especially with Drusilla at his side.”

I leaned forward on the table and fixed him with my Slayer-eye. I had been preparing for this all night.

“Giles, I know the risk. Believe me, no one better. But Spike did help us before and I could use his help now. I weighed the options. Just trust me, okay?”

“But, Buffy, how could he possibly help you? And do you realize what it would mean for Drusilla to feed again?”

“Not anything worse than him killing twice as much and giving half to her. Same pile of corpses. Giles, please. It’s been a long night.”

Giles plucked his glasses off and rubbed them vigorously as an outlet for his emotions. I let him process while I got a shower in the gym showers, for once free of other sweaty teenage girls, and called my mom before she left for the gallery.

When I got back to the library Willow and Xander had arrived. From the look on Giles’ face, I knew he hadn’t told them about last night’s development. They were excitedly discussing the big bowling gig of double-date-ness. Apparently it was great.

“And they even had the inflatable things in the gutters,” Willow ended excitedly to Giles. He smiled politely back and glanced up at me.

Xander caught sight of me and jumped up to give me his chair.

“Hey, Buff, how’d it go last night? Lots of dust piles this fine sunny morning?”

“Yeah, loads. So, bowling was peachy-keen?”

“Oh, it was great. I won, using my considerable bowling skills and I must admit, even Cordy was impressed.”

It was so easy to make him happy.

“Good for you, Xan. Keep it up.”

“So, your night was good too?” Willow nervously asked. “No horrible happenings that we weren’t there to help with?”

“Nothing big,” I told them. “Spike just came by and offered to help me with Faith.”

“What?” Xander shrieked. He was loud too. “Spike just offered to help? Did you stake him?”

“Silly Xander,” I said lightly. “How can he help if I stake him?”

“You make it sound like he’s borrowing a cup of sugar, Buffy,” Giles said, a touch exasperated, I think.

“Okay,” I said in my best take-charge-Buffy-knows-best voice. “I’m gonna say this once. You guys can grumble and whine and think I’ve contracted Slayer-insanity, but I’ve weighed all the options and decided Spike’s help is necessary. I know he’s evil and I’m being careful. I won’t let either Spike or Drusilla hurt any of you. Just please trust me and try not to worry.”

Empty stares greeted my words. They greeted Oz and Cordelia as they walked into the library and got those oh-no-the-world-is-ending looks on their faces. I hate the fact that we all wear that look regularly. But I couldn’t stand another round of explanations and arguments so I decided to go to first period, which hey, happened to be conveniently at that moment.

“I’m gonna go. I’ll let you tell them all the bad news and argue about my mental health. I’ll be back later.”

Giles nodded to me.

“Of course, Buffy. Also, please remember to come back during lunch. We need to work on your focus some more.”

***

The library doors closed behind Buffy with a gentle swish. Oz and Cordelia sat down at the table and there was silence. Finally, Cordelia couldn’t stand it any longer and burst out,

“Can someone please say what’s going on? I hate to break it to the rest of you, but I’m not a mind-reader and if some big nasties are trying to kill us all, I want to know.”

Xander winced a little, but nodded to Giles to explain.

“Right, well, I suppose you all deserve to know. Spike is back in town.” Giles sighed and leaned against the table. “Once more, Drusilla is with him and apparently they are very much together. Spike went to Buffy last night and offered her another truce.”

“What does the jerk want this time?” Cordelia asked. “Fashion tips? He could use them. Well, so could she.”

“Research for Drusilla. She’s fallen prey to a gypsy curse, similar in conflicting agony, though of a different kind, as the one Angel was under.”

“Drusilla has her soul?” Willow gasped. “Do you think Spike is holding her hostage then?”

“Why should we care?” Xander interrupted. “Soul or no soul, that creep killed Kendra and would’ve been oh-so-happy to rip all our throats out.”

“Fascinating as all these points are,” Giles told them, “none are pertinent at the present time. Drusilla does not possess her soul, but instead is unable to feed. Spike is asking for our help to cure her while he assists Buffy in dealing with Faith and the Mayor.”

“They’re still all growl-y and evil, right?” Willow asked. “So why would she say yes?”

“Because, she does need help - especially with the coming days-“ Giles added as if to himself. “She may not have the strength to combat both Faith and the Mayor in whatever manner he may be attempting to be evil in. She needs help.”

“She’s got us!” Xander put in proudly.

Giles sat down.

“I’m afraid it’s not that simple, Xander. Buffy has often had cause to be glad of our help, but in a combat situation, someone with equal strength and fighting skills would be more help to her. Spike can offer her that.”

“Spike could also offer her a home six feet under,” Xander snapped.

“Buffy is aware of that, Xander. And she has made her choice. The rest of you can either make that difficult for her or aid her in her endeavor.”

“Endeavor, like, as in try?” Cordelia asked. “Buffy’s already off the deep end. I’m not making it worse. Xander, let her get killed. Then the rest of us can go on with our lives.”

“Really heart-felt advice there, Cor,” Xander growled.

“Xander, let it go,” Willow whispered. “Buffy’s smart. She’s probably got him all sized up and ready to dust.”

“She’s right,” Oz added. “Buffy knows the game. Let her play it.”

“We’re all agreed, then?” Giles asked the group. “We don’t have to like Buffy’s decisions, but we can support them.”

“Giles, can’t you Watcher her into sanity again?” Xander made one last-ditch effort.

Something spasmed over Giles’ face, but he quickly controlled himself.

“No, Xander. That would not be a course of action open to us.”

“Fine, then I’m in,” Xander said as he gave up. Giles nodded.

“Well, then I suggest you all get back to your classes.” They dispersed from the room leaving Giles in rapt contemplation and agonized thinking.

 

***

When I arrived back at the library Giles was there alone arranging crystals on the table.

“Hard work,” I commented, stepping over to him. “I don’t know how you keep up with it.”

“Amusing, I’m sure,” he replied. “Now, sit down here and we’ll begin.”

With a sigh I sat down and let him do his meaningless training. It was very boring. I wanted to talk to him about Faith or Spike or something with some meaning to it. But he just droned on and on and pretty soon all I could focus on was one of the crystals he’d placed in front of me. In fact, I think I was supposed to look at it. It was pretty, shiny and important. Definitely of the utmost, dire importance. This crystal held a message for me and I bored my eyes into it, blind to all else, to discern what it could be.

Then again, maybe it was just a stupid crystal. Giles always says I put too much stock in the little things. And it was kinda ugly. Sort of mucus colored and not even that shiny. Maybe Giles was more interesting after all. I looked up and concentrated on him. Yup, more interesting.

“Buffy, are you all right?” he asked in concern.

“Yeah.” I raised my head. I felt like I’d been asleep. “Yeah, just tired from the no sleeping last night, I guess.”

“Perhaps you should skip patrolling tonight?” he suggested. “Or take one of us with you.”

“Na, I’m good. Spike is supposed to helping me, so he can come. You can work with Queen Crazy.” Giles hemmed and hawed a bit.

“Yes, well, while I fully intend to support you in this, Buffy, I can’t possibly tonight. I have some Watcher business to attend to that will require my full attention. Also, I think it would be helpful if either you or Spike were there to control things. I don’t trust Spike, but I trust him more than her. Drusilla is, by all accounts, unpredictable.”

“She’s nuttier than a fruitcake,” I amended and turned to go. “Oh well, he’ll just have to settle for another time. I can’t wait to tell him.” I smiled as I left. A chance to disappoint Spike, the day was looking up.

 

***

From the sounds as I entered the mansion that night, Spike and Drusilla had been doing something very gross. And, in a very sick way, I wasn’t even surprised by all the blood on the floor.

“Spike!” I yelled. “Get out here now!” He ambled out of the bedroom, shirtless and with his jeans unbuttoned. Did he even own underwear, much less wear it? I rolled my eyes and tried not to stare. I may be the Slayer, but I’m not blind either, and while my inner repressionist got to work on that statement, I yelled at Spike.

“I need you to patrol with me. Don’t argue either; it’s time to fulfill your end of the bargain.” He didn’t argue, but he took his time in buttoning his jeans and pulling on a black t-shirt. The duster went over this and finally he was ready to go. He took longer than I did and he didn’t use make-up. Though from what Angel had told me, Spike had gone through a black eye-liner phase. I decided to tease him about it later and gestured impatiently at the door.

“Let’s go!”

Spike had been ignoring me up to this point, probably thinking about what he’d been doing earlier, but now he looked at me funny and then said,

“You’re out of sorts.”

It was a statement, not a question. I thought about it a minute and realized, I was out of sorts. I didn’t know why.

“Can you analyze me later? Let’s just kill things. Evil things, like you,” I said evasively.

Spike nodded and didn’t press the point, though I could practically see the wheels turning in his head. I wonder if that’s something I can do with every vamp or some special Vampire/Slayer bond he and I had built up? Scary thought. I need to stake him before this sharing thing went any further.

“Dru honey, let’s go,” Spike called.

I groaned.

“Can’t we leave her behind?”

“Leave her behind and she’ll do something evil, Slayer,” Spike whispered in a scary voice. How corny can he get? Drusilla came into the room, dressed in this come-jump-me dress that I noticed Spike eying intently.

“Wacky lady’s here, let’s go,” I urged.

Spike stopped dead in his tracks.

“We’re gonna work together nice, pet. Her name is Drusilla and I want her called that.”

I could see he was going to be stubborn again.

“Fine, Drusilla. Whatever.”

She smiled slowly at me and walked toward me. I shrank back a little from her unearthly smile and watched as she stared at the air above my head.

“Two birds in a row, mummy shoots one, the other falls low. New birdie comes out to play, gets burned by the fire and little girl goes all away. Official man scoops up the remains; my boy plays that sweet refrain.” At the end of that little rambling, I wondered why I hadn’t stopped her before then. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t look away from her eyes.

Spike crossed the room and pulled her away from my gaze.

“Now, now, Dru. Slayer doesn’t want to be undressed today.”

“What?” I shrieked, coming to my senses away from those eyes.

“Your mind undressed,” he explained in an amused tone.

Either way, I was creeped out.

“We are going now,” I said firmly and walked quickly toward the door and the cemeteries where normal vampires hung out and I dusted them. I tripped over the doorway. How’s that for a big exit? I picked myself up and felt my head. I was dizzy and couldn’t think straight for a minute, but I watched Drusilla stroll over the threshold with a dancer’s grace and winced. The night had to get better. It had to.

It didn’t. Not to say that the two vampires weren’t good company or anything, but I was off my game. Drusilla did better than I did in the dusting arena and she, one: didn’t want to dust vampires, two: is crazy and three: according to Spike, wasn’t feeling her best that evening. According to her, the stars weren’t singing the right song or something. Either way, that made me royally suck. I didn’t know what was wrong, but it was starting to scare me. My reflexes were terrible and my strength largely diminished.

Just my luck, we came upon a nest. Only five vamps, but if I’d been alone, I would’ve died. Spike saved my life. There’s a phrase I never thought I’d say and hope never to again. One of the vamps had cornered me against a mausoleum. Normally, I’d just flip over his head or distract him with a smart remark, but even my punning ability seemed to be gone.

Instead, I ducked between his legs and kicked him really hard. Or at least, Xander’s version of really hard. I think he felt it, deep down somewhere. That scared me so much I just froze. I literally couldn’t move as I watched the vamp sink his teeth toward my neck and then all of a sudden, he exploded into dust. The cloud cleared and revealed Spike standing there with a stake in his hand. I stared up at him for a minute and he got annoyed with me. Stupid vampire.

“What are you staring at? A thank you will suffice, Slayer.”

“We have to go,” I managed to choke out. “Something is very wrong.”

“Yeah, you’re a bit off this evening, aren’t you?” Spike commented cheerfully. I could tell he didn’t care a lick that I was suffering internally. Ungrateful vampire.

Spike and Drusilla accompanied me, (accompanied me!), back to my house and made sure I got inside safely. The Slayer being watched over by two vampires. It should make the head lines. I resolved to talk to Giles first thing in the morning. Of all times, now I needed my Watcher.

 

***

“Giles, I need you! Something is terribly wrong!” I burst through the library doors and pounced on my Watcher who was kneeling next to a large stack of books. He jumped at my sudden entrance and knocked them over. Normally, I could’ve managed to save him from several knocks on the head, but this time, I felt like I was molasses I was moving so slowly and Giles ruefully rubbed his head. Through my distress, I was proud of myself. I knew what that word meant.

Focusing on Giles, I helped him sit down at the table. He took off his glasses and asked,

“What’s the situation then? Is the world ending?” It’s eerie how normal he sounds when he asks that.

“Spike saved my life!” I wailed. Dang, I did say it again.

Giles raised his eyebrows.

“Forgive me for not seeing the importance in that statement, Buffy, other than the irony, of course.”

“I can’t fight. I-I’m useless. I could get killed by anything. My reflexes are non-existent, my aim is terrible, my strength is gone and I can’t even pun anymore.” I knew I sounded like a whiny girl, but I couldn’t help it. Maybe my former flakiness was coming back into play since I’d lost my Slayer cool. At least I hoped that was the reason.

“Calm yourself, Buffy. We’ll figure it out.”

I did calm down. No matter what happened, Giles and his books always came through. He would find out what had happened to me, concoct a nasty-tasting potion and then I would kill whatever did it. Perked up by this scenario playing out in my head, I randomly hugged Giles in relief.

“Thank you! Promise me you’ll do it soon.”

Giles looked down for a moment and then up and he looked worried.

“I promise you, soon, everything will fine.”

I didn’t know what to make of his expression, but I knew Giles was dedicated to making sure I’m okay. I was comforted and despite not being able to save some mousy tenth grader from her overbearing boyfriend, and having to have Cordelia do it for me, the rest of my day was great.

***

Faith lay on her new bed and stared at the ceiling. For the past day she’d done nothing but listen to music, play the Playstation or read comics. She was bored. She glanced down at her hands. They were starting to tingle, a feeling that she knew preluded that itch to go out and kill something.

Faith remembered Buffy telling her that she had that itch too. But she controlled it, or used it in a constructive Slayer manner or something lame like that. She could just hear Buffy now, laying down the law. It made her mad. Buffy always acted so perfect. It had been awesome coming to Sunnydale and finding another Slayer, but after awhile, the constant lectures had started to grate.

Who was Buffy anyway? Just because she’d been doing this for a long time and she’d had to make tough decisions didn’t mean Faith had it any easier. In fact, she had it harder; having to start over at the beginning and pretend like she was learning something she was born knowing.

Faith got off the bed and leaned on the windowsill, looking down at the quiet streets of Sunnydale. But she knew they weren’t really quiet. Just below the calm veneer of the town lurked a whole world of bad. A world she was sworn to fight, but instead, she’d joined that world.

She still didn’t know exactly what had made her come to the Mayor. It was just a gut feeling of hers that he would do right by her. That he didn’t keep secrets. That he would love her when no one else would. That whole thing with Miss Post had been awful; leaving Faith feeling like everyone around her was a sham. Doing things so it benefited themselves and pretending not to be the whole time. Except the Mayor didn’t do that. He never pretended to be anything but evil and he told her so. He told her she was his finest employee and an absolute joy to have around, but he also told her that if she ever crossed him, he’d kill her.

There was honesty for you. None of this, they’re evil, they’re good, they’re evil crap. The whole Angel thing had wigged Faith out. Buffy had been so broken when Faith had met her. And it had come from trusting the wrong guy. It had come from the whole moral ambiguity issue that seemed to run over Sunnydale like a plague. It made who you trusted a matter of life and death. Faith still didn’t know if she’d made the right choice, but she’d made it and she wouldn’t turn back.

She would show the world that she could do something just as well as Buffy, only she wouldn’t be held back by Buffy’s self-inflicted morals and attitude. The Slayer powers were hers by right and Faith meant to use them. If that meant crossing Buffy, then fine. She just wished she didn’t miss Buffy and their friendship so much in the meantime.

The Mayor knocked on the door and Faith turned around with a smile. Yeah, Buffy may have been nice to have around, but here was a guy who would literally stop at nothing to make her happy.

“Faith,” he said, “I’ve been thinking about our little Buffy problem. How’s about we sit down, have some dinner, a healthy one, mind, and discuss how you can help?”

Faith’s smile grew larger and she grabbed a jacket on her way out the door.

“Sure thing, boss. I got loads of ideas for taking down ole Buff.”

***

That night was one of the worst nights of my life. I won’t go into detail about the other worst nights, like the one where I died or anything, but this one was far up there. I was helpless and I was betrayed. That’s a feeling I never have anymore. But I did then.

I was walking home from school. The sun was down so I was hurrying. That thought alone is really abnormal. In my weakened state I kept imagining footsteps and creepy sounds, but I got to my house without mishap. The door was open.

“Mom,” I called, “not a good idea to leave doors open in this town, you know.” I wanted to keep the reprimand light. It’s just funny me reprimanding her anyway. No response. Cue Twilight Zone music. There was a photograph on the door with my mom, her eyes wide and terrified, and a vampire, a huge smile on his face. I turned and ran back out the door as fast as I could to the library.

Giles was still there. That wasn’t unusual; he’s, like, always there. But he was pacing up and down, a frantic expression on his face, and I wondered if something else bad had happened.

“Giles, something has got my mom!” He glanced at me quickly and then away guiltily. I paused, something was really wrong. “Giles, what is it?”

“I’ve failed you,” he began and then stopped.

“Giles, we can get her back. It’s not your fault.”

“It is. It is my doing. The reason you have lost your powers-“ He cleared his throat and set a syringe down on the table. I stared at it in shock. “It’s an adrenaline suppressant and muscle relaxant. Every Slayer, if-when she reaches her eighteenth birthday, undergoes the Cruciamentum. It is a test of her ability to survive without her powers. I don’t approve of it, but as your Watcher I had no other alterna-”

The syringe smashed into the wall beside his head. At that moment I wished I had my powers more for sending it spiraling into his head instead of missing it, than for saving the world. I shook with powerless rage and terror.

“You, you son of a-“ I stopped, unable to talk. Giles advanced toward me and I recoiled. “Don’t touch me!”

“Buffy, I am so sorry. I cannot begin to apologize.”

“No, you can’t.” My voice was tight. He turned away from me and his voice sounded hoarse.

“No. It will wear off in a few days, I promise.”

“That won’t exactly help my mother. What did you do to her?” As much as I wanted to kill him; I had to find her first.

“The Council has notified me that the vampire with which they were going to test you has escaped and captured your mother. They said - they said to rescue her would be your task.”

“Screw their task!” I walked over to him and punched him as hard as I could. His neck didn’t snap like I wanted, but I was sure there would at least be a bruise later.

“Tell me where she is.”

“The motel by the highway,” he gasped out. “Buffy, please, let me come help you.”

“You? I don’t know you,” I said and turned around walking straight into Spike with a smack, who had come in unnoticed by either of us.

“Poor Slayer in a bind then?” he asked casually, steadying me with one hand. I so wanted to kill him.

“Get out of my way, Spike,” I snapped and stalked over to the weapons cabinet where I loaded up on stakes and a crossbow. Giles sat slumped at the table, but I barely noticed. I left with Spike’s words ringing in my ears.

“Don’t get yourself killed now, pet. Be a shame if some nasty got to you before I did. Dru’d have a fit. Hands in pockets, Slayer.”

I had no idea what he was talking about, I didn’t care and I didn’t look back.

***

The hotel was old and abandoned. Probably structurally unsound. Just the place for the Council to conduct their shady tests. I pushed open the creaky door and held my crossbow at the ready. The place was cloaked in shadow and the swinging door made everything seem alive and moving. I stepped into the hotel and didn’t shut the door. A quick exit would be handy.

Furniture was piled up, blocking doorways, leaving only the hall open to walk in. Someone was planning on having me then. Great. I headed down the hall, not daring to call out to my mother, not knowing where the vampire was.

Oh, there he was. At least so said the foot that connected with my head, throwing me to the floor and sending my crossbow spinning out of my hands. Twisting around, I saw the vampire standing over me, his face in a feral grin.

“Mother and I have been expecting you,” he purred. Actually purred.

“She’s not your mother!” I spat out and scrambled to my feet. I put my hand in my pocket to find the stake I had stuck there. The vampire grabbed my hand as it came back out and pushed me against the wall.

“Kralik wants to play with his sister. For awhile.” I inwardly shuddered, having a good idea what playtime between vampire siblings would be like.

“Sorry, but I’ve decided to disown you,” I muttered and dove between his legs and, face first, shot down the laundry chute conveniently located behind him. I heard brother dearest roar in rage behind me and figured it was a good thing I was an only child.

The laundry chute was fun, until I smashed my face into the ground at the other end. That was less fun. But my mother was there, tied to a chair with a gag in her mouth. I raced over to her and untied her even as I heard Kralik’s footsteps racing towards us down the stairs.

“Mom, are you okay?” I asked as I shoved her behind me and handed her one of my stakes.

“Buffy, what’s going on? I’m so glad to see you by the way.” I smiled. Good old mom.

“Let’s concentrate on not dying first,” I told her.

“I know you can do it, honey,” she replied. “From all you’ve told me, you can kill anything.”

I almost started laughing. Finally, just when I was unable to prove my ability to kick butt and take care of myself, my mom started to believe in me. Life’s little ironies sure are interesting.

“Here, sis. Here, sissy,” Kralik crooned as he strolled into the room. “There you are. We’re all together again.” Mom and I slowly backed away from him and he moved toward us. “I miss you,” he told us. “We never spend time together anymore.”

“We decided you’re just too needy,” I replied. I think the quick wit was the first of my abilities to start coming back. He kicked me in the stomach and I doubled over. Kralik grabbed my hair and shoved me against the wall, baring my neck.

“Family always tastes the best,” he muttered against my neck. I braced myself.

“Not if you’re really dead.” Kralik’s eyes went down and his face tightened in recognition and dismay.

“Bye, bye, bro,” I said sweetly, pushing him away and watching him burn into ash, then clicked shut the lid of the Zippo Spike had placed in my pocket when I bumped into him.

“Buffy, Buffy, are you okay? What’s going on?” Mom grabbed me and hugged me for a long time. I hugged her back. It was wonderful.

“I’ll explain it all when we get home and safe,” I told her, leading the way out.

When we got to our house I saw Spike leaning against the doorjamb, smoking and waiting. When he saw us he simply held out his hand. I slapped the lighter into it and took my Mom inside, then stepped back out again.

“Why’d you help me?” I demanded. He smirked a little.

“So you can help Dru, it’s obvious. Sides, no fun to let someone else kill your prey.”

I slapped his face as hard as I could but I doubt he felt it very much.

“I am not your prey,” I said very quietly. “You are mine.”

And I walked into the house and slammed the door, but not before I heard him reply.

“Exactly, pet.”

***

I had to go back to the library sometime. I did, early the next morning. Giles was there and so was a fat, older, pompous looking man. He looked up at me and held out his hand.

“Ah, Miss Summers, I presume. Well done, I must say. Congratulations, you’ve passed.”

“I can’t tell you how little that matters to me,” I told him disdainfully, ignoring his hand. He lowered it and looked over at Giles and then back at me.

“You displayed admirable courage and cunning, Miss Summers, and we will look forward to your continued service.”

“Service!” Giles exploded. “How can you, Quentin, after what she’s been through? Take your barbarism back home now that you’ve finished with us. Enough harm has been done.”

Quentin cleared his throat importantly before turning to Giles.

“I’m not finished yet, Rupert. Miss Summers passed. You didn’t. The Cruciamentum is not just a test for the Slayer, but for her Watcher as well. Your attachment to the child had weakened your judgment and we will be finding someone else to guide her.” I looked up, shocked. I was still mad at Giles, but they were going to fire him. Giles looked at me sadly and then turned away. Quentin looked at me again and added,

“Your new Watcher should arrive within a few weeks. Take care, Miss Summers.”

I looked up at him slowly and let the words drip out of my mouth and land as hard as stones.

“I think you better leave town before I get my strength back.” He did look a little taken aback, maybe I’m still somewhat formidable. Yay me. He left and I stood looking at the floor.

Giles cleared his throat and started to speak.

“Buffy, I-I am so-“

“Don’t,” I said, cutting him off, “don’t say you’re sorry. You can’t make it not happen. Not now. I thought you cared about me, but all along, I was just your job.” Tears dripped down my face and dropped onto my shirt.

“That is not true,” he began again.

“Then tell me you didn’t poison me.” He didn’t say anything. “How could you, Giles? I lay my life on the line every day for you and them and everyone. How could you bastards not tell me?” I spat it out at him. Hurled the words to bring the force my body no longer could. Because of him.

“I wanted to, but it was my job. I made a wrong decision and I cannot tell you how much I regret it. Please forgive me, Buffy.”

“I won’t. I don’t forgive you and I don’t like you and I don’t trust you. You’re here and there’s not much I can do about that, but it will be a long time before I come to you again.” Even through my pain I could see he could’ve taken a dagger through the chest with less damage, but I didn’t care. Maybe someday, but not today.


	5. In Which the Past Literally Comes Back to Haunt Me

For some reason I was dreaming about Jenny Calendar. She was not someone I wanted to see in a casual dream or even non-casual, come to think of it. She brought back memories and guilt and betrayal and old wounds. Yet there she was, smiling at me. Of course, her head was crooked and she had to stand sideways to look at me. That was interesting.

“Buffy, how are you?” Her voice was light and mellow.

“Pretty tired, actually. Could you skip off to somebody else’s dream and let me sleep? Like Giles maybe. Traitor with traitor.” Her face was sad then.

“He never meant for this to happen, Buffy. He was just caught between a rock and a hard place.”

“First off, I’m not a rock, and, second, well, it’s supposed to be hard to betray someone. That’s what makes it a betrayal.”

“Buffy, who said you were the rock? It’s a hard place to be in; caught between the values of your life and a person you love. I know.”

“Yeah, well, it got you so very far,” I told her, trying to quell the feelings this conversation was releasing from the special place I used to suppress them. Her face twisted a bit, like she was also trying to forget, but she chuckled a little at me.

“Regardless of my actions, I know whom you blame for my death.”

I swallowed hard and said the unnecessary.

“Me.”

“Why?”

“Because I didn’t kill him before he could kill you.”

“True. Maybe you should just die.”

My head snapped up at that suggestion.

“What are you talking about?” I hate it when ghosts pop into my dreams and tell me what to do.

“You’re so useless, just die.”

“If I die then a lot of other people die without me.”

“Exactly.” I watched her lips, they were so perfect. Not rotted away, but just as I remembered. “Buffy, you have a purpose and you need help with that purpose, just like you used to have.”

“Oh, I’ve got help.” I laughed bitterly. “Two civilians, a green witch, a werewolf, a back-stabby librarian and two psychotic vampires. We could even add in the partridge if it’d make you feel better.”

Jenny laughed with me and then said gently.

“I meant Angel.”

“Oh, the vampire who murdered you?” I asked casually.

Her lips quirked up in a smile.

“That’s the one. Buffy, I’m happy now and I’ve forgiven him. Angelus is no more. It was Angel you killed.”

“Wow, which makes me feel so much better. But this is ridiculous cause, like you said, I killed him.”

“The dead can be brought back. He was dead before you killed him.”

“Really don’t need a reminder about my boinking the undead here. Faith already has that position filled.” My voice caught. “Well, she did anyway.”

“She’s another reason you need him. There’s a ritual you can perform, Buffy.” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“Buffy, I need you. Please.” Angel’s voice echoed in the blank space I suddenly occupied and I saw a flash of him kneeling on the floor with blood dripping down his face.

 

I sat up in bed, gasping. Mom knocked on the door and told me to get ready for school.

***

I made sure that Willow was with me when I went to the library, but the instant we arrived she went to sit on Oz’s lap. So much for best friend stick-togetherness. Giles sent me a look but otherwise didn’t try to talk to me. I had recovered my powers, but the memories didn’t go away along with the helplessness. Xander and Cordelia came in, wrapped around each other in a way that reminded me of a less-adept-at-being-good-at-too-much-PDA, Spike and Drusilla. It creeped me out that I was even mildly able to rate that sort of thing so I called our meeting, for lack of another word, to order.

“It’s been a couple of days, but some stuff happened you guys should know about.”

“What’s up, Buffy?” Willow asked, all perky and innocent. I wish I was like that again.

“Giles is no longer my Watcher.” It hurt to even say his name. Everyone looked stunned, of course. Giles didn’t say anything. “The reason I lost my powers was that the Council was trying to test my skill at not being killed and I passed, but apparently he didn’t. I don’t know why, though, because he seemed to do exactly what they wanted in my opinion.”

Only Giles caught the slur, but only Giles was intended to. Willow was highly indignant. That actually amused me.

“They fired Giles? They can’t fire Giles! It’s like firing the President or the wise-man or something.”

“Whatever Giles may be, he’s fired and they’re gonna send another Watcher.”

“More Englishmen?” Cordelia asked, bored. “Can anyone else say blah?”

“Giles, are you okay?” Willow asked, frantic in her concern for the man. Go, Will, you nurture that Judas-wannabe over there.

Giles slowly looked up from where he’d been fondling his glasses. I’ve noticed he does that when he doesn’t want to be involved with something.

“There are other matters on my mind at present, Willow,” he replied, glancing at me and then at Willow’s look of confusion, added, “such as the Mayor.” Way to cover up your betrayal, Giles.

“Oh yeah.”

Everyone was quiet for awhile. I broke the silence.

“Just be careful, guys, around the new guy. I trust him more than some people at this moment, but he does work for the Council of Bored Old Men Who Have Nothing Better To Do Than Run My Life.” With that crushing statement, I made a swishing exit.

 

***

 

“What’s her deal?” Cordelia asked, puzzled. Xander nodded.

“Yeah, I’ve never seen Buffy so…so…”

“Bitter,” Giles supplied bitterly. He sighed as he glanced at the four young people seated in his library and who trusted him. “Buffy is rather upset right now. It’s my fault and I take full responsibility. I’m afraid it was I who acted on the Council’s orders and took away her powers and thus endangered Joyce.”

“What?” Xander and Willow cried.

“Yes, I betrayed Buffy and now she does not trust me. I would hold no grudge against any of you were you to choose likewise.”

“Count me in,” Cordelia said as if they were discussing an after school activity. Oz stayed quiet, watching Willow’s expression turn to horror.

“Giles, you-“ she stopped.

Giles looked at her, pained and nodded.

“Yes, I did. I am deeply sorry for it now, but it is done and now Buffy is paying for it.”

“I-I gotta think about this.” Xander stood up and walked away. Willow gripped Oz’s hand and stood up also.

“I have to talk to Buffy.” And she left. They all left, leaving Giles standing alone, looking at the table.

 

***

“Buffy! Wait up.” I cringed at the sound of Willow’s voice echoing behind me in the hallway. It wasn’t unexpected, but I didn’t want to deal with anyone right now. But I turned anyway and pasted a cheery Buffy smile on my face. I saw she could see right through it. Dang, but Willow’s getting good.

“Don’t look all fake-happy, Buffy. Giles told us what happened.” I flinched at the sound of his name. “Buffy, I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine why he would - how this happened.”

“I know, Will. Don’t sweat it. It’s not your fault.”

Her face got the guilty, puppy look.

“But I could’ve helped you. I’ve been so busy and not around. I’m a bad friend when I’m supposed to be the best friend.”

“You are, Will. You always will be, but that doesn’t mean you have to be my shadow.”

We moved to the lounge and sat on one of the couches.

“But I could be my shadow and my shadow could be with me who’s with you,” she said hopefully. I looked at her askance. Willow wrinkled her nose. “I know, that’s dumb. But I know you’ve been through a lot lately. I can’t imagine how much. I admit, I was really jealous of Faith and when she went away I didn’t know what to say.”

“Willow, you don’t have to say anything. We’re cool now, right?”

She nodded vigorously.

“Totally of the cool with us. Best buds.”

“What about the Spike sitch? Do you think I’m totally crazy?”

“Not totally crazy, but maybe like ten percent crazy,” she admitted. “Spike’s always given me the heeby-jeebies. But I trust you, even when you’re ten percent crazy.” I smiled and felt warmer than I had in days. I missed my Willow. Faith was new, exciting and intense, but it just didn’t compare to the warm, secure, giddy flavor of Willow.

“About Giles,” she continued. The warm feeling vanished. “What are you going to do?”

“I really can’t trust him right now,” I said softly. “But you go ahead. It will just take me awhile.”

“I can imagine, or rather I can’t, but I’ll try,” she offered. I gave her a hug and heaved a deep breath and proceeded to tell her about my Jenny and Angel dream. Her eyes got as wide as only Willow’s eyes could and she exclaimed,

“Talk about a restless night. Poor Buffy.”

“I know. I just can’t decide if it’s a Slayer dream or not and if Angel really needs my help. Normally, I’d talk to Giles about it, but…” I let my sentence hang in the air.

“Yeah, well, if you like I can do some research,” she offered. “Use my magic-y know how.”

“Be careful, Will,” I admonished. “I know you’re all about the magic these days, but I don’t want you in over your head.”

“Oh, posh,” she said. “Be supportive friend here. I’ll be careful, I promise. All careful-ness.” I smiled.

“Good.” Willow smiled back, but got serious again the next minute. “Buffy, I know how much you want to help Angel, but maybe this is just a distraction that you don’t need right now. Or even if he needed help, should we give it to him?”

I felt betrayed as she said it, but I nodded.

“There’s always a risk in everything we do. Let’s just see if we can figure out what it is first. And don’t tell anyone. Especially not Giles or Xander. They aren’t exactly what one would call Angel-friendly.”

“You got that really right,” Willow replied, obviously out of the depth of her experience with Xander.

“Also,” I added as an afterthought, “maybe you could do some crazy vampire research? I have to keep my deal with Spike and so far, out of the two of us, he’s done more. And you know me, I gotta keep ahead of the dead.” Willow smiled, but with little real joy.

“You got it. The only research I think I ever didn’t want to do and will.”

“You’re the best,” I told her as she left for the library. But I still felt cold inside. One good Willow conversation couldn’t repair the damage that Angel’s death and Giles’ and Faith’s betrayal and revived memories brought on by dreams and Spike’s little lectures, had wrought in me.

 

***

The air was warm and sweet. I felt sticky and decided to go home for a shower. But when I turned to leave, the door to the library swung shut, and Angel stepped out of the shadows,

“Hello lover,” he said, his voice a caress compared to the last time I’d heard him say those words to me. I stared at him and devoured him with my eyes. Great, now I'm creating my own trashy romance novels.

“Where are you?” I asked.

“Oh, hell,” he replied, as if that didn’t matter at all. “But where are you?”

“Hell,” I answered.

He shook his head and tsked at me.

“Buffy, you deserve better than that.”

“I think you do too,” I replied, tears coming to my eyes. Angel walked toward me and wrapped his arms around me. I felt overshadowed, sheltered and insignificant. “Why can’t we be happy?” I murmured into his chest. A low rumble of laughter reverberated against my face through his shirt.

“Because I’m dangerous when I’m happy.” I wrapped my arms around him tighter. “You’re as close to happiness as I’ve ever gotten, Buffy,” he told me. “Don’t let that die.”

“I promise. I never will,” I assured him, meeting his lips. It had been so long, but something wasn’t right. Something disappeared, something changed and he melted away. I cried out in dismay and fell to my knees at the loss.

 

***

 

Faith looked down at the bowl filled with clear water and watched Buffy fall to her knees. A twinge ran through her at the sight, but she let a dangerous smile play around the corners of her lips. After all, how are the mighty fallen.

“Coming along nicely,” the Mayor commented from behind her.

Faith turned to greet him.

“Little Miss Perfect’s gonna have a mighty craving for the big guy before long.”

“Excellent,” he praised. “I’m going to leave this in your hands. I’ve some business that has to get done by this afternoon. Funny how work just piles up when you’re planning destruction. I didn’t have time for my drive shot this afternoon. You know, I wonder if demolition workers deal with this problem?” Faith stared blankly. “Oh well,” he said with a winsome shrug, “evil calls. Couldn’t have done it without you, Faith.”

“Right, boss,” Faith told him and turned back to the image of Buffy. The Mayor exited and Faith searched her mind for more memories Buffy had shared with her to use against her in her dreams.

 

***

For some reason I didn’t tell Willow about the latest dream. Her words about Angel trying to contact me not being a good thing had really grated. Plus, it was just really personal, the two of us together. I wanted to keep it that way for now. She hadn’t come up with anything on the dream front, having to be careful not to alert Giles to what she was doing.

Over the next few days I had assorted dreams involving Angel in one form or another. Most of them, he would come to me as he used to and then something would come and take him and hurt him. It was starting to drive me absolutely insane, not being able to help him, and everyone I know seemed to make it worse by not knowing and not seeing the issues that continued to plague me, such as dealing with Faith and the dreams and the constant strain of working with Spike. He was the only one who didn’t strain on my nerves, other than normal anyway. He just was what he was and that was evil and wanting to kill me. I knew where I stood. Nowhere else did I know and it was killing me.

 

***

Giles was working late in the library one night when the door opened and Spike strode in with Drusilla twirling on his arm. Giles sighed and put down the book he was holding.

“What can I do for you two?” he asked, impatience in his voice. Spike slowly smiled at him.

“You can start fulfilling your end of the bargain, mate. Dru here is hungry.”

“Like a shark,” she agreed, licking her lips and staring at Giles’ throat.

“I’m rather busy right now,” Giles answered quietly.

Spike’s grin disappeared.

“You’ve got nothing to do, Watcher. Heard all about your being fired. Now be a good guy and help us evil folk. I may have promised the Slayer not to hurt any of her mates, but then again you don’t seem to be all that close lately. She might even thank us for it later. But either way, she never said anything about us annoying you to death.”

Giles sighed and gestured to the table. Spike sat Dru down, giving her a small knife to play with. She amused herself sticking it in table and twisting bits of wood off. Giles was not pleased, but he got down his section of books on vampires and gypsies and he and Spike got to work

 

***

“Lost the boy-toy again?” Spike’s voice snarked out at me from the crowd at the Bronze.

“Go away, Spike. I’m meeting Angel right now, otherwise I’d take the time to dust your sorry dead shell.” He appeared beside me and I glared at him.

“Where is he then? Late, I think, or not showing?”

“Daddy’s gone! He’s gone. And it’s time to pay, Buffy.”

Now Drusilla was there, also with the mocking and annoying. I walked away from them to stand by the door so that I would be sure to spot Angel when he came in. Behind me I could hear Drusilla crying to Spike about how much her daddy needed to do and how she wanted him back.

“Just try it; the good deserve a second chance.” Oz jumped off the stage and handed me his guitar. There were strange markings on it and I tried to memorize them but the guitar vanished in my hands and when I looked up at Oz, he’d disappeared and Faith was there.

“Hey there. Looking for him?” She showed me Angel across the room, bound and gagged with various demons doing nasty things to him on the pool table. I started to run to him, but Faith held me back. “You ain’t got a clue, do ya? The way is not by him, it’s to him. He’s the only one that can help you beat me. Face it, Blondie, I’m just too good for you.”

Angel lifted his head and stared at my face, anguish in his eyes.

“Please, Buffy. Please, help me. I love you.”

Faith grinned at the tears rolling down my face and pulled out a wickedly sharp knife.

“Now, I’ll give you to ten to get it done before I come after you.”

 

I opened my eyes and felt for my alarm clock. It was three in the morning. I couldn’t stand it any longer and got dressed and headed for the library.

Giles, Spike and Drusilla were there. Great, some of my least favorite people and non-people in the world, all gathered together where I was.

“Buffy!” I’d surprised Giles out of his reserve. Yay me. “What on earth are you doing here at this hour?”

I fumbled for an answer, anything non-Angel related would do. Then I spotted the books they were reading.

“I couldn’t sleep. So I decided to come here and do some research and stuff.” Spike lifted an eyebrow and I knew he could tell I was lying. I just hoped he wouldn’t say anything. He didn’t. Drusilla wasn’t so helpful.

“She misses the Angel-beast!” Giles looked at me with concern. I shrugged it off.

“I always miss him. I’ll deal. I’m just gonna take some books over here.” I grabbed some books on vampires and the card catalogue and headed into the stacks. Once there I settled down and found what I was looking for: a way to bring Angel back. Flipping through pages, I spotted the exact same markings from my dream and anxiously read the by-script. It was a spell designed for reviving vampires and summoning them from hell. Neat little package if you ask me. Still, it was what I needed so I slipped the book in my pocket and made a lame excuse to leave and then left. I thought I could get some sleep now that I had a definite answer in my hands. And I did.

***

I didn’t tell Willow about finding the spell. I did tell her that I’d had another dream and she promised to look in the library during her lunch hour. After talking to her I went into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. Was I really going to bring back Angel using a ritual of questionable integrity and possibly do something really stupid? I knew I should wait for Willow or start talking to Giles again, but I couldn’t. But this could be critical and I forced myself to think. I had just convinced myself to wait for Willow’s research when Cordelia walked into the bathroom. She went straight to the mirror, of course.

“Well, if it isn’t Wonder-Buffy,” she snidely remarked.

“Hello, Cordelia,” I answered, smooth and calm as butter, that’s me.

“So, now that Giles isn’t your Watcher anymore and turned out to be, like, evil, are you just going to become even more neurotic than normal?” She’s always been one for casual questions, has Cordelia.

“Could you be more specific?” I asked as politely as I could. She started on her lips now that she was done with her eyes. I idly wondered how much more make up her face could wear.

“You know all obsessive and loner and wounded.”

“How am I being obsessive?” I started to ask. “Wait, you know, I don’t want to know.”

“Ever since you had to kill your boyfriend and ran away from home, you’ve been all gloomy and distant. Despite his eye-candy potential, I was glad you killed the psycho freak, but now I wish he was still around so that you could stop ruining everyone’s day with your guilt complex.”

I stared at the girl. She was raving mad, had to be. Or maybe she was just Cordelia, but either way, out of line.

“Whose life have I ruined, exactly? I’m sorry, did I make you miss cheerleading practice?”

Cordelia put her lipstick back in her purse and zipped it up, then turned to face me.

“No, Buffy. I’ve gotten to all my commitments and still managed to keep up with my friends. Not like you have though, or were you actually planning on going to Xander’s big night at the Bronze?”

I know I must have looked confused, cause I was.

“Huh? Xander has a big night?”

“Yeah, the one he’s been talking about for weeks. The one he invited you to. The stand up comedy contest tonight?” Somewhere in my mind this rang a bell. Somewhere very far away. “I thought so. Well, while you’re off moping about Angel, the rest of us will be at the Bronze, supporting Xander, my very lame boyfriend, who, nevertheless, I will be seen in public with.”

Cordelia turned her back to me and walked out and I turned back at the mirror and looked at myself. That clinched things. I had to get this Angel thing out of the way so I could go back to worrying about normal things.

 

***

As I sat on a bluff, high over Sunnydale, I promised myself I would be done in time for Xander’s contest. That said, I got to work. Studying the diagrams in the book, I sprinkled salt in a circle around me with an x through the middle and placed the Claddaugh ring he’d given me on it. Standing inside, I grabbed my candle and lit it and held it up high, then pricked my thumb and squeezed the drops of blood onto the candle, extinguishing it. Then I prepared to read the incantation that should bring Angel from wherever he was, back to me, to free him and to save myself.

“What the bloody hell are you doing?”

I jumped. I hadn’t gotten a single warning from my senses that Spike was behind me.

“It’s none of your business, Spike. Just get out of here or I swear I will dust you.”

“That better not be the kind of ritual I think it is, Slayer.”

“What would you know about it?”

“That book is notorious. Baddest evil of the worst kind.”

“Then what is Giles doing with it in the library?” I realized the answer to my question in the sneer on his face.

“Git’s got to keep it safe, right? Or maybe he’s got a bad-magic fetish, either way, stop whatever you’re doing.”

“Don’t tell me what to do, Spike.”

“Fine, tell me what you’re trying to do then. Bring back Lover-Boy? He’s gone, pet, face up to it.”

I was tired of trying to argue with him.

“I can bring him back,” I ground out, trying not to cry at being so close and being thwarted like this.

“Something that looks like him maybe, or something that has his memories, or maybe really him. But you can’t go messing with dimensions and life and death, Slayer. Not without consequences. There’s always consequences. Always.”

“You say it like you have a conscience,” I spat at him.

He chuckled a little and started pacing outside my circle.

“No more I do, luv. But magic’s got a way of getting at you, whether you care about good and evil or not. And I’d just as soon not have all the walls to the dimensions torn down because you miss my wanker of a grand-sire.”

“I need him!” At that moment I didn’t care it was Spike talking and seeing me like this, I didn’t care I was supposed to be the strong Vampire Slayer. I just needed Angel.

“Well, you can’t have him!” Ooh, he was irritating.

“Who are you to say? What if it was Drusilla? For some reason you care about her. Would you do it if it was her?”

“I never would’ve killed her in the first place,” he pointed out. “But yeah, I would if I thought it could be done. But it can’t.”

“He’s the only one who can help me! He’s the only one who can stop the dreams.”

Spike’s eyes narrowed. Whoops, probably shouldn’t have mentioned those.

“What dreams?”

I told him. I didn’t know what else to do. With any luck he’d just go away. But knowing Spike, that didn’t seem possible. The guy didn’t know how to leave. He was leaving-deficient or something.

“Dreams are dreams, Slayer or not. It’s possible to block them out, and if it will keep you from blowing up the world with your bloody teenage angst, you can learn how.”

“If I had Angel I wouldn’t need that,” I persisted.

Spike sighed and leaned against a tree.

“Slayer, you’ve got people. Do you know why you’re alive? Because you have them. Most Slayers I’ve known would never have gotten this far. Going up against the Master! Hell, I wouldn’t want to. But you did and it’s cause you’ve got family and friends tying you here. Weren’t for your Mum, your blood’d be pooling in my veins. Stop reaching for the un-gettable and look at what’s already in your hands. Stupid cow.”

“Excuse me?” I stuttered at the last comment.

“You heard me. Anybody who can’t see what she has right in front of her doesn’t deserve the gifts you’ve got. And you got to stop this. If I have to knock you out, I will.”

“You’ll try,” I told him.

He smirked at me.

“Yeah, and ruin your pretty little circle while I’m at it. Bloody shame that.”

I sighed and looked down at the circle and knew he was right. Heck, that was what Cordelia was saying. If the two of them were right and I was wrong, maybe I already had broken down the walls of the dimensions and this was Insane-Backward Land. That made sense.

“Fine. You win. I won’t do it.”

“Sensibility grabs hold,” he commented to the air. “Come on, Slayer, let’s go.”

Spike escorted me to the library like I was an alcoholic about to jump off the AA bandwagon and entered the library with me to make sure I handed the book off to Giles. Nothing like your own personal intervention vamp. Giles looked up at us in surprise.

“Buffy, Spike. Everything is all right, I presume?”

“Presume away, Rupes,” Spike said. “Your Slayer here is in a bit of a psychotic bind. Straighten her out, will ya? Got enough do-gooding to have to do without nurse-mating an emotional stunted eighteen year old girl with super powers.”

“Buffy.” Giles reached toward me in concern, but didn’t touch me. Spike rolled his eyes and left.

Sighing, I told Giles what had been happening the past couple of weeks. The short version. He was still not up on my A-list.

“Buffy, I understand why you didn’t want to come to me. I still wish you had.”

“Cut it, Giles,” I told him. “Listen, I’ve been feeling alienated and like the only person I can talk to is Spike, which is so majorly weird I don’t want to think about it, but I realize I’ve been the one pushing people away. And this dream thing, well, sounds like evil Hellmouth-y vibes to me in retrospect. But we’re still not friends. I know inside that you were trying to do the right thing and I’ll come to you for all my Slayer problems, until New-guy gets here, but I’m gonna need some more time.”

“I understand.” Giles looked up at me again. “I appreciate your honesty, Buffy. Again, I can’t tell you how sorry I am.”

“No, you can’t. But it’s a start,” I told him. “I’m going to go catch the end of Xander’s contest.”

He nodded.

“Of course, have a good time.”

“I intend to.” And as I walked out, I realized that I did and that I would.

***

Faith stuck her head in the Mayor’s office.

“Bad news, boss. Spike talked her out of it. Looks like she won’t be chaos-ing her life up anytime soon.” She flopped down on one of the chairs in front of his desk.

“Oh well.” He sighed. “It was a long shot. But a pretty brilliant one, though. You did an excellent job, missie and that’s not something to be ashamed of.” He smiled at her with fatherly pride. “I just love seeing my little girl following in my footsteps.”

Faith laughed a little and stood up.

“Well, I think I’ll head home. Catch ya later.”

“Be careful now. I know you’re capable, but always keep your eyes open.”

“Sure thing,” Faith replied and headed towards home. She thought on the way and they weren’t pretty thoughts. All that stuff she’d used against Buffy, that had been personal stuff. Things Buffy had shared with her in confidence and while Faith may be working on the evil side, that didn’t seem quite fair to her.

The look on Buffy’s face as she saw Angel again, the raw agony of watching him be tortured, the despair as he was dangled just out of her reach. It was horrible. Faith had never been close to anyone. Except Buffy. And this was the result of that friendship.

“I never back down on a decision. Girl had it coming,” Faith told herself and meant it, but a single tear rolling down her face said otherwise.


	6. In Which Amulets and Betrayals Play a Part

I had definitely come to terms with some of my feelings over Angel’s death so I was feeling up. I walked down the hall with Willow and Oz feeling that life was on its way forward.

“So, Buffy, you Bronzing it with us tonight? The Dingoes are playing. You know, Oz’s band, the band Oz is in, his  
band,” Willow said proudly.

Oz and I shared eye contact that communicated Willow-fondness.

“I could probably stop by. I do have to patrol, unfortunately with Spike.”

“Poor Buffy. Well, at least we’ll load you up with warm feelings and good things before you have to see him.”

“Thanks, Will. I got to jet though, apparently Giles wanted to see me, stat.”

“Oh, that’s right. He told us,” Willow said.

“Did he say what it was about?” I asked. They shook their heads, but Oz offered,

“I think it was Watcher stuff.” Oh joy.

***

Faith sat straight up in bed, the sweat pouring down her face like she’d spent four hours wrestling with a crocodile in 120 degree weather. She hated nightmares. She didn’t know how much longer that she could take this.

“Maybe payback for B’s dreams,” she muttered and then caught her breath. “B,” she murmured thoughtfully, tracing patterns on her comforter with her finger.

***

Giles eyed the young man unpacking books on his library table with some distaste but no actual animosity. He seemed sincere enough. Giles knew of him by reputation and his record had checked out with great success, but Giles supposed he would dislike anyone who was taking over his responsibilities.

Wesley Wyndham-Price straightened from the table and adjusted his bow-tie nervously.

“I must confess, Mr. Giles, at being somewhat timorous upon meeting Miss Summers. This is my first assignment and while the Council has asked me to grind to a halt any contact she has with you and I would appreciate no interference when it comes to my interaction with her, I could use your help in an advisory capacity.”

Giles stared at Wesley and wondered if he’d been this pompous when he arrived. He rather hoped not.

“Yes, well, I’m sure you’ll do just fine. Modern methods and all that.”

“Yes, quite. There have been tremendous advancements in the field since your day.” Giles winced at the reference to his age. “So I’m sure I’ll be just dandy without you. But do stay on call, won’t you?”

Giles quirked an eyebrow, but nodded, knowing full well he wouldn’t go anywhere and leave Buffy behind.

 

***

I pushed open the library doors and entered a bit warily. The library had never exactly been my favorite place, but it had become a sort of sanctuary and lately had been more of a torture chamber. There was a young man, in his late-twenties perhaps, good-looking in the really-younger-than-Giles sort of way. But glasses and suit and all he fit the Watcher profile.

“New Watcher?” I asked Giles. He nodded. “Are you evil?” I addressed Giles Jr.

“Evil?” He seemed genuinely confused.

I sat down on the edge of the table with a sigh.

“The last one was evil.”

Recognition dawned on the younger bespectacled man in the room.

“Ah, Miss Post. Yes, we all heard. Still, no. Mr. Giles has checked my records thoroughly and I believe we’re ready to start our work without any evil tendencies showing up.” He gave a little half smile. I rolled my eyes, but sat down and proceeded to listen to the best, (I swear), of my ability. It took awhile to break Giles in; I shouldn’t expect any less of this one. Not that I wasn’t still mad at Giles because I was.

New Guy started bustling around the table and fondling notebooks. Then he straightened up with a gasp. I wondered if maybe he’d left an important one of them behind in merry old England.

“I guess I haven’t introduced myself, have I? Most remiss of me; my apologies. Wesley Wyndham-Price.” He offered me his hand. I shook it.

“Buffy Summers.”

“Right, now that that’s taken care of; let’s begin, shall we? Tell me all about last night’s patrol.” He got out a notebook and pen and prepared to dictate with an enthusiasm that was frightening.

“Uh, well, I didn’t patrol last night. It was Spike’s turn and I let him-“ I stopped, realizing that mentioning Spike was perhaps not the wisest course of action. Stupid vamp’s more trouble than he’s worth.

“Did you say Spike?”

Shoot, he caught the gigantic slip I made. Imagine that. They sure make them smart over there in the old country.

“Yeah-huh.” Guilt all over my face.

Wesley’s eyes got really wide, as wide as his glasses. I’m serious.

“Fascinating! Is this the very same vampire known as William the Bloody?”

“Afraid so,” I admitted.

“And you staked him?” He got quite animated. Maybe Spike had killed his great-great-grandpa or something.

“No, I kinda let him live, or be undead, or whatever the term is.” Wesley sank back down again.

“Was he too much for you? Admittedly he is one of the most notorious vampires known to mankind.”

Humph, maybe. Not like I would admit it or anything.

“He and I have a deal. He helps me with my evil issues, I let him research.”

“A vampire interested in research?” The wheels were spinning, I could tell. “Most interesting. Could I perhaps meet him? In a controlled environment, of course.”

I wanted to laugh really badly, but, instead controlled my impulses, and proceeded to explain to the stuffy, clueless human being across from me, my history with Spike.

“Again, quite fascinating!” Wesley was enthralled at Spike’s antics over the years. Funny how all the killing and mayhem and death become study-worthy when the do-er is Spike. “I must tell the Council; they’d be extremely interested.”

“NO!” Giles and I shouted together.

Wesley looked at us like there was a fire and we were circus loons, one of the two anyway.

“Why ever not? Buffy, these people are your superiors and are entitled to know about your abnormal dealings.”

“They’re entitled to know squat,” I spat at him. “You’re talking about the people who tried to kill me a few weeks ago.”

“Now, Buffy, that was a regrettable accident, of course, but you mustn’t blame them. A good Slayer always-“

“A good Slayer is one who has people she can rely on,” I replied. “At the moment I trust Spike more than the Council! Those jerks wouldn’t do a thing to help my mother when it was their fault she was kidnapped in the first place!” Wesley sat back and didn’t say anything. “Please don’t say anything to the Council. I mean, you can’t. I won’t let you.”

Wesley looked a little pissed off in a really wussy way, but I put on my scary Slayer face and he melted like butter.

“As you wish. I will, however, be keeping a close eye on this Spike situation and should anything alarming occur I am going straight to the Council.”

“Just run it by me first,” I told him, bored of this business talk. I am a teenage girl after all. “I’ve got class, so bye.”

“Wait please,” Wesley called after me. “Report back to me as soon as school is completed for the day to discuss tonight’s patrol.” He turned to Giles. “Now, Mr. Giles, I will need all of your diaries on Miss Summers.”

Hold the phone. I turned around.

“You have diaries about me, Giles?”

“I’ve told you about the Watcher’s diaries, Buffy. They are essential for good training.”

I sputtered.

“Yeah, well, not about me. About everybody else, not me. Besides, you wouldn’t even let me read the Slayer’s Handbook!”

“She hasn’t read the Slayer’s Handbook!” Wesley looked like he was about to fall over and die.

“She wouldn’t follow the rules anyway,” Giles muttered under his breath, but I caught it.

“I so would. I’d be perfect.”

Wesley nodded in support.

“I shall see about getting you a copy, Buffy.”

“Thank you, boss,” I told him just to get back at Giles. Wesley preened and Giles…smiled? Harrumph to that. Turning around, I flounced out of the room looking like I enjoyed going to chem class.

***

Wesley had given me the boring job of rummaging around in a crypt looking for some stupid amulet or something. Sometimes the world of Slaying is not so glamorous. I kept getting this weird vibe from my senses, but I chalked it up to my stressed out-ness of the past few weeks. I can be dumb, I admit it, oh, but lucky for me it was just Faith stalking me. I turned with a weary resignation.

“Okay, let’s get this over with.”

She sauntered over to me wearing less clothing than an Amazon.

“Hey, B. Long time no see. What’s up?”

“You apparently. On drugs now to add to your psychosis?”

She laughed a little, but her face screwed up a touch as well. Score one for Buffy.

“Guess I deserved that. Listen though, got a proposition for you.”

I shook my head,

“What is it with you people? Is it Be Good For A Day in Evil-City or something?”

“What can I say? All the cool kids are doing it.”

“Cool kids do pretty stupid things, but most of them don’t kill people,” I said scathingly.

Faith rolled her eyes and walked closer, her palms out in a gesture of peace. Like I believed that for one nanosecond.

“Listen, Buffy, get over it already. Now do you wanna hear what I got to say or shall I out myself from your presence?”

I sighed, knowing my inevitable maybe-she-can-be-saved button had been pushed.

“What is it?”

Faith smiled like she knew what I was thinking. Darn her.

“Kinda sick of the Mayor’s happy and clean evil plan. Been missing me some of that girl time you and I used to revel in. Thought I’d look you up, see if we could hang out?”

I almost fell on the floor laughing, but caught myself when I remembered this was probably what she wanted: an opportunity where I’m vulnerable and she could slit my throat.

“You must think I’m an idiot,” I said. “I don’t have time for traps, Faith. Go bug someone else.”

She sighed.

“I knew you’d feel that way and I don’t blame you doing so, what with your lifestyle choices being so different from mine, but I’m on the level here. I’m not saying I wanna be all white-hat or whatever, but I just want a truce.”

“A truce?” I scoffed. “A truce. So you don’t try and kill me so we can chill and share secrets and then you can go back to the bad guy and reveal all? Come on, Faith. You can do better than that.”

“I just want to hang. Let’s go to the Bronze tonight and tomorrow we’ll be back on untrusting ground, deal?”

“Did someone put a sign on my forehead saying: I’m a moron--come make a truce with me?” I asked in real confusion because I was starting to think that’s what had happened.

Faith threw her hands up and started to walk away. Finally. Whoops, no, here she comes again looking all defenseless.

“Buffy, the truth is I’ve been having nightmares. I just need someone to be a sounding board so I can blow some steam. I know I’ve no right to ask you, but you’re all I’ve got. I know you can do it real well, remember? I just need someone who I know lives the answers.”

I sat on a coffin and pondered that awhile. Why, oh why, am I such a sucker for redemption cases? That was Angel’s and my whole problem right there. Why did Faith have to know just the right spots to chink my armor off? Mentally chastising myself and yet feeling such relief I could barely contain it, I gave a limp nod.

“Fine, whatever. Let’s do something.”

Faith nodded happily.

“That’s what I’m talking about. High five.” And she offered me her hand palm out. I stared at it a little blankly, unsure of what this might mean. Somewhere deep within my deeply confused brain was the knowledge that I was supposed to hit it, but that didn’t compute just then.

“Right,” Faith said, lowering her arm. “Guess we aren’t up to high fives yet. So, B, spotted a nest of little vamps about to ravage Sunnydale on my way. Wanna get some staking in?”

Numbly I nodded, vaguely thinking about vampires and stakes and traps and nests and how much fun it could all be.

“Oh yeah, I do,” I suddenly said, snapping out of my funk. “Please.”

***

Watching the departing, oblivious Slayers was a black-clad blonde vampire with one hand holding a cigarette to his mouth and the other hand around a dark-haired, scarlet-clad vampress giggling to herself.

“Come on, doll,” he said, pulling her after him into the crypt. Going to the coffin Buffy had previously been rummaging in, Spike pulled out something glittering from around the corpse’s neck and holding it up to the light, smiled viciously. “Let’s go. Now that we’ve done our part here the little girls will need watching.”

 

***

 

After we had cleared out the vamp nest, which was an absolute blast, by the way, Faith and I were on our way to the Bronze when some other vamps jumped us. They were your ordinary every day vamps, with uniforms and swords. Wait, that part was weird. Their leader, well, I assume it was the leader, because he had two more stripy things on his clothes than the others, came up all threatening at us. Faith and I exchanged eye rolls.

“Give us the amulet!” he demanded rudely.

“The what?” I asked in genuine confusion.

“Balthazar demands his amulet and His Holiness must be obeyed. Surrender the amulet, Slayer!” he demanded again.

This guy was way too demanding. Faith looked at me and nodded toward the other vamps, I nodded back. I looked at Leader-guy.

“How about this instead? I kill you and His Baltha-whatever-ness doesn’t get his amulet and I have some fun. That sound good?”

With a growl he rushed at me and I side-stepped him. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Faith egging on several of the other vamps. That made me smile. But here was Mr. Vamp again, trying to kill me for no good reason, this time with some friends.

We traded blows for awhile before I decided to take the fight to better places and turning, ran towards a nearby crypt. I ran up the side and, turning around, kicked one of the vamps so hard his neck snapped. Ducking under another blow, I tripped up Mr. Leader and got jumped from behind. Unknown Vamp tried to get my neck, but I bent over and kicked him from behind and he slumped off. Grabbing his friend beside him, I threw him against the crypt wall and staked him.

Overhearing Faith’s cries of joy from behind me, I looked and saw she had all but one of hers staked and was playing with him. Some things never change.

“Any day now, Faith!” I called and she looked up and nodded.

Leader vamp was up now and running towards me. I side-stepped him again, this time snatching the sword he’d drawn and, spinning around, decapitated my other vamp. Leader and I now faced off, me with his sword. He wasn’t too happy about that and ran off in the other direction. Coward. But hey, I had the sword.

“How ya doing there?” Faith asked from beside me.

I grinned at her, relishing the joy of killing with someone, other than Spike and Drusilla, who knew what they were doing.

“I’ll definitely say of the good,” I answered.

Faith grinned back at me.

“Know what I feel like?” she asked.

“Killing something?” I asked.

“Besides that,” she said, laughing a little.

“How about some really cute guys and loud music?” I guessed.

“You’re good,” Faith answered.

I smiled and, slapping her hand this time, we headed off to the Bronze.

***

I was having a blast. I hadn’t felt this free in a long time. I had the feeling somewhere in the back of my mind that Wesley and Giles should know about those vamps with the sword who were after the amulet I hadn’t gotten when I should’ve and that I was dancing in the Bronze with Faith who was evil and a dozen other guys I didn’t know. Well, they didn’t need to know about the guys. They’re my Watchers, not my Keepers. Well, Wesley was. Giles technically didn’t matter anymore. Anyway, this was awesome.

I was finally out of breath so I stepped out of the dance crowd toward my drink and who should be standing there, but Spike. Good feelings slipping away.

“Having fun, pet?” he asked dryly.

“Not that it’s any of your business, Spike,” I replied scathingly.

“Isn’t that your evil twin?” he asked, unscathed, pointing to Faith who had come up behind me.

“Wow, B,” Faith exclaimed, “you got the nose for good-looking dead guys.”

Drusilla came out of nowhere and stood in front of Spike possessively.

“Mustn’t touch what’s not yours!” she growled.

Spike seemed pleasantly surprised.

“Why, Dru! You care,” he said.

She looked back at him and traced his lips with her finger.

“Just as you are, I am,” she answered cryptically. Now that was the Drusilla I knew.

“What do you want, Spike?” I asked, bringing the conversation back to its point. If it had one, I wasn’t sure at this point.

“Seems to me you could use a little nudge back in a healthy direction,” Spike answered. “Aren’t you supposed to be delivering this back to the Percy pair?” He held up an amulet on a chain. I made a grab for it but he swung it out of my reach. “Ah, ah, Slayer,” he admonished. “I don’t think you’re really invested here.”

“Spike, stop being an idiot,” I said. “What the heck are you talking about?”

“Precisely this, pet. Those vamps with the swords are part of a religious order that worships the demon Balthazar, who needs only this amulet to be a real contender here in Sunnydale. They will be wanting it and anyone who can find it or knows how to use it.”

Realization dawned.

“Giles and Wesley.”

“Now she’s waking up,” Spike said lightly.

A cell phone rang in Faith’s pocket and she answered it while Drusilla imitated the ring rather well and rather annoyingly in my ear.

“Yeah, boss. Sure thing. Nope, wouldn’t miss it for the world. Of course. Nope, just hanging out. Well, I was bored. No, I’m behaving myself. No, I’m okay to walk there. Yeah. See ya.” Faith hung up the phone and turned to leave. “Sorry, B, Mayor calls.”

I watched in disbelief and rising anger as she walked away.

“Faith, I could use your help right now!” I called after her.

Laughing, she called over her shoulder.

“Evil here, Buffy. But I’m sure Spike will do well. Gee, hope nothing happens to ole Giles while you’re here.”

I wanted to kill her, but instead, very calmly turned to my vampire helper and his mate, and discussed the situation rationally.

“You better figure out where this demon guy is,” I told Spike. “I’m going to see if Wesley and Giles are okay. Keep the amulet for now; they won’t think you’d have it. Meet me back at the library.”

“Sure thing, Slayer,” Spike replied and grabbing Drusilla from where she’d been ogling a dancing couple on the floor, headed out the door, reassuring her. “Soon, baby, they’ll be sinking to the floor with your teeth tearing the flesh…” I didn’t hear the rest for which I was thankful.

I ran out the door and to the library where my worst fears were realized. Giles and Wesley were nowhere to be seen, but Giles’ office had been messed up and there was blood on the floor.

 

***

Faith was a little annoyed with herself as she walked back to the Mayor’s office. She had just meant to hang out a little with Buffy and calm herself from the fright of her nightmare and maybe keep Buffy a little off balance, but instead Faith had really enjoyed herself.

“Just what B needs thinking I’m all save-worthy, I’ll never get any peace,” she muttered to herself. But Faith put all that aside as she entered the Mayor’s office and found him watching a couple of his vampire minions drawing on the floor and lighting candles.

“What’s this all about?” she asked.

“Faith!” The Mayor turned with a great big smile. “This is just all part of the ritual I’ll be undergoing in...” he checked his watch, “...about two minutes. Why don’t you wash your hands before we get started and don’t forget to get under the fingernails.”

Faith nodded vaguely and went into the bathroom and splashed some water on her hands. When she came back out the Mayor was kneeling in the diagram on the floor and speaking some funky language. In a few minutes it was over and he stood up.

“Did it work?” she asked. It looked like nothing had happened.

“Well, let’s try and see.” The Mayor looked unperturbed as usual. He gestured to one of the vampires and he, in turn, opened the door behind him. The very same leader of the vampires that attacked Faith and Buffy earlier rushed out at the Mayor and swung another sword at his head, splitting it in two.

“No!” Faith cried out in horror. The Mayor’s head wavered for a moment and began to shake, then slowly fissured itself back together without even a line to show where it had been broken.

“Well, that was certainly interesting,” the Mayor said. Faith started forward and then stopped. The Leader vamp was standing beside her, as nonplussed as she was. Sighing, she pulled his sword from his hand and knocked off his head.

“Faith, what have I told you about slaying on my carpet?” The Mayor reproved. “So unhygienic. But we’ll let it slide this time. After all, this is a big day, the start of the one hundred and twenty days before my Ascension. Nothing can harm me until then.” He pulled out a notebook from his vest pocket and checked off something on it, then put it away with a smile. “How about some ice cream for my favorite girl?”

Faith looked at him and wondered if he was for real but smiled and went with him leaving the vampires to clean up the mess.

***

I was on the phone with Xander and Willow when Spike and Drusilla came back.

“Got the location, pet,” he informed me.

“Good,” I said, brushing past him and grabbing a sword and crossbow from the weapons cabinet. “They’ve definitely got Giles and Wesley so we need to hurry.”

“Drusilla, I want you to stay here,” Spike told her. “You haven’t fed in awhile and you’re weak.

She pouted a bit but then saw the blood left on the floor in Giles’ office and sort of glided over there with her tongue licking her lips. I felt sick and decided now would be the opportune time to leave.

“Let’s go!” I told Spike sharply. He held out his hand and I slapped an axe in it and we left.

Arriving at the run down warehouse we took scope of the situation. A huge tub of water stood in the middle of the room and a horribly obese and warty looking demon sat in it being sluiced down by some more vampires of the sort I had met earlier that evening. Giles stood at the tub with his head clamped in between two pasty clawed hands belonging to Tub Guy. Wesley was practically melting on the floor but I noticed he was also cleverly cutting his bonds with a penknife. That would take awhile and, in the meantime, Giles looked like he was in pain.

“Where is my amulet!” screamed Fat Boy. I suppose his name is that B name or whatever but I can’t be bothered to remember such a thing at the moment.

“I’ve told you already,” Giles said calmly, “I have no idea where it is or why it would be needed. Of course, I could always do some research.”

Good old Giles and his research. But it didn’t seem to go over with He Who Must Be Watered.

“Unacceptable!” he screamed at the top of his lungs like a baby without his rattler.

“I’m sure it’s around somewhere,” Wesley reassured him in a totally scared out of his mind voice. “I know it was in the cemetery because I sent Miss-“ he stopped, probably realizing he shouldn’t have said that. Frailty, thy name is prissy British guys. Don’t be so surprised, sometimes I read.

“Information,” crowed the demon. “Hurry, break his kneecaps.”

Wesley wilted even further, but passed his penknife to Giles.

“But I like to have my kneecaps,” Wesley whined.

I decided now was the time to intervene.

“I’ve got your amulet,” I said, calmly dropping down into the midst of them. “But I’ll only give it if you say pretty please.”

I decapitated two of the vamps standing around like nothing was wrong. I started fighting off the guards around Giles and Wesley. Giles was having much better luck with the penknife, especially since the Big Guy had dropped him to his knees beside the screaming Wesley.

Spike broke down the door just then and used his axe to chop off a few heads. We got down to the serious fighting while, all the while, Mr. I Need My Amulet Fix ranted and screamed about the unacceptability of it all. If I may use a Cordelia phrase, what is his childhood trauma?

Giles broke his bonds and also Wesley’s and I tossed him a sword one of the vamps had dropped. He stood up, pulling Wesley along with him and I tossed the Quivering One my crossbow and, surprisingly, he caught it after a few fumbles and didn’t shoot his own foot.

Spike and I had pretty much decimated the vampire guard, but, upon seeing that, Wart Man used his pretty telekinesis powers to grab Giles’ head again. Wesley cowered and hid behind a box and used the crossbow to shoot at random things he seemed to think might be attacking him. He shot a couple of vamps actually. I was quite proud. He was toughening up faster than Giles had. Maybe it was my growing talents.

Anyway, Giles was in danger so I chased a vamp up a couple of boxes stacked up beside the water tank and after dusting him, cut the cables that led to the water heater and then stuck it into the tub full of more flesh than water and walla! extra crispy fat demon.

Giles dropped to the floor holding his head and Wesley, coming out from his corner, went to him. Spike staked the last couple of vamps and we all gathered at the water tank.

Then Mr. Fat and Creepy opened his eyes suddenly and said,

“Beware the Ascension. You’ll wish I’d all killed you then.”

Cheerful fellow, isn’t he? The vote for going back to the library was unanimous, not that I would’ve cared about any vote besides mine. Wesley and I supported Giles who said he had a migraine. I surprised myself by actually caring and Spike strode along like the dark creature of the night he must be.

When we got back to the library we found Drusilla laying on the floor coughing up a storm. Spike rushed to her and picked her up.

“Dru! Dru! What’s the matter, love?”

“Stars are veiled, Spike,” she murmured. “I need my blood cure.” Spike stroked her cheek and then set her down on the table. He turned around and stormed over to me all irate. Oh great. The perfect end to my night.

“Right, Slayer,” he said warningly, “I want some research done. I’ve been holding up my end of the bloody deal. If you don’t start working on Dru’s problem, the truce is off and you and I go at it right now.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Giles, if you feel up to it, you and Wesley can work on that little problem while Mr. Melodramatic takes Her Royal Sickness home.”

“I mean it,” Spike told me dangerously. “She comes first.”

Then he stalked over to Drusilla and picked her up and carried her out. Thank God. Just then Xander and Willow rushed in, all concern. We had to explain the whole situation to them and everything. Oh well.

***

Spike carried Drusilla to the Bronze where he killed a canoodling couple outside in the alley and fed them to her. Drusilla drank eagerly and then was able to support herself.

“I don’t like this, baby,” Spike told her. “The blood seems to drain out of you somehow, quicker and quicker each time. We have to get that cure fast.”

“We will, my love,” Drusilla calmed him. “Then you can win the prize and I can have the trophy. What a giddy day for Miss Edith.”

Spike quieted and rested his head against Drusilla’s.

“That bint gets on my nerves.”


	7. In Which We “Help” Faith

By the time everything had been explained to the rest of the Scoobies I had had plenty of time to start being mad at Faith again. Where did the girl get off coming to me and then just ditching me like that? I went home, had the standard mother-daughter chat about Slaying before bedtime and then pondered the situation.

I couldn’t get out of my mind Faith’s expression when she told me about the nightmares. I cursed my thoughts for the directions they were heading in - Faith-can-yet-be-saved directions. I ignored my prodding conscience that told me I had not yet done all I could to help her and went to sleep. Not that that stopped my conscience. The dang thing continued to bug me for the next couple of days until I finally couldn’t stand it anymore.

***

Xander and Cordelia were walking together. They weren’t exactly arguing, but they weren’t exactly agreeing either. Xander was venting some of his worry and anger over Buffy’s decision about Spike and Drusilla and Cordelia was obviously sick of hearing about it.

“Xander!” she interrupted him, “I get that you’re upset, but the decision is made, now get over it. I’m here now and you’re here now. Nobody else is here right now!”

“Not anymore,” Faith said as she stepped out from behind them through a gap in the cemetery wall they were walking past. Xander and Cordelia jumped and Xander stepped between Cordelia and Faith.

Swallowing nervously and laughing a little, he asked,

“So, it’s Faith. Um, whatcha been up to?”

“Besides being all evil and everything,” Cordelia muttered. Xander glared at her and Faith smiled a little dangerously.

“Gotta spend my time making sure the little kiddies don’t get eaten on the way home.”

“We’re fine, thanks,” Xander assured her. “Great seeing you again.” He started to pull Cordelia away.

“What’s your rush, Xander?” Faith purred and Cordelia’s eyes narrowed. “We don’t have to act all nasty toward each other. You and I were always friends.”

Xander looked like he was about to faint and drool at the same time and Cordelia took charge of the situation. She stepped in front of Xander and snapped at Faith.

“Back off, Slut-bag. I don’t care how many superpowers you have; Xander is my turf and you will keep your hands off!”

Faith laughed a little and turned around and walked away.

“Just a little fun, Queenie. We all know how much Xander is yours.”

Xander stared after her and Cordelia slapped him on the head.

“Ow!” he yelled. “I didn’t do anything!”

“Nothing but drool like a moron!” she told him, looking disgusted. “I’m going home.”

“What about our plans?” Xander asked, sounding bewildered.

“Maybe Faith is interested in your plans, Xander,” Cordelia said over her shoulder, “but until you stop acting like a raging hormone bomb I’ll be washing my hair.”

Xander stared after her a minute and then shook his head and walked off, muttering to himself.

Spike stepped out of the shadows where he’d been lingeringly finishing a meal, dropped the body and watched Xander go, smiling. Musingly, Spike lit a cigarette and strolled down the street toward Buffy’s house.

***

The minute Spike walked into my yard I knew there was trouble. After all, something hadn’t happened in almost three days and I was getting worried. With a sigh, I sat down with him on the front porch and proceeded to drill for oil with a toothpick through five million tons of earth, or, in other words, tried to get what he wanted to say said without him going on for thirty years before he actually got around to it. Maybe Spike had that thirty years to spare but I sure as heck didn’t.

“The short version, Spike,” I said wearily. Spike smirked a little but sat down next to me.

“You outta hide your feelings better there, luv. I can see right through you.”

“In that case you’ll know I really really want to go to bed and could use a short conversation with you instead of the long one I’m expecting.”

“Right, well, just thought you should know that your Slayer-ettes are getting accosted by your evil twin.”

Spike stood up to go and I grabbed hold of his coat with one hand.

“What was that?” I asked.

Spike took my hand off his coat and stepped away to lean against one of the porch railings.

“Leave the coat alone, pet. It’s older than you are and deserves respect.”

“To hell with the coat, Spike. What is Faith doing?”

“Just following your boy and his cheerleader around and flashing her cleavage everywhere is all. Cheerleader about took her out though. Feisty bint that.”

“Oh, Cordelia’s words know no bounds,” I said absently.

A new thought had entered into my head and I thought it over. Spike’s eyes watched me and he stood there, smoking contentedly, but alert as a cat. How does he do that? I’m always alert, but I can’t look relaxed while I’m doing it.

Whatever. Now was not the time to be contemplating asking Spike for his relaxation methods of alert-ness or whatever it’s called. Faith needed some help. Why did she need help? Why, it was obvious. She must have missed normal, sane, good people or she wouldn’t keep coming to us. Um, scratch the normal, sane and good on the Cordelia though. But Faith must have had a reason for approaching us and the fact that I had heard her lie on the phone to the Mayor about her whereabouts led me to believe it wasn’t at his behest.

“Spike,” I said evenly, “I have a plan. I’ll need your help.”

Spike just looked at me and nodded. And we were set to go.

 

***

 

The next day I revealed the plan to everyone in the library. It took awhile but I managed to convince Giles and Wesley that it was a good idea. It took even longer to threaten Wesley so he wouldn’t call the Council about it but in the end I had all the help I needed.

I put Willow onto the net searching for where Faith might be living on the Mayor’s funding. I also had Spike hunting through Sunnydale at night figuring out what Faith was up to. In between studying for chemistry, training with Wesley and patrolling, I tried to figure out her daytime pattern.

Even though Cordelia was still acting on the cool side with Xander I told them to stick together and be extra careful, especially after dark. The same went for Willow and Oz. During that time we waited.

 

***

 

Xander was walking along the street, nervously looking over his shoulder and peering around as though every shadow was going to grab him.

“Gee, Xander, you look a little jumpy,” Faith whispered as she appeared out of nowhere beside him.

“Faith! Well, um, it’s late out here and, um, what are you doing?” he asked as she snaked her hands up his arms and put them around his neck.

“Easy there,” she said. “Just cause I’m evil doesn’t mean I still don’t have certain needs. Catch my drift?”

Xander’s mouth dropped open.

“Sure you do,” he postulated quickly. “Needs, yeah. Lots of needs. We all have lots of needs…” His words died off as she covered his mouth with hers. He pulled away and then tried to back away.

“Um, listen, Faith. Totally flattered here. Very tempting, but, uh, you know Cor-“

“Cordelia?” Faith said, amused, moving closer to him. “Cordelia leads you around by the nose. She never lets you come out and play. Well, I am all about the fun.” She sidled up to Xander and turning around, rubbed her back up against him. “Come on, Xander, let’s play.”

“Oh, gosh. Oh, um. Choices.” Xander fumbled around, obviously having a hard time with this decision.

“Hey, Faith,” Cordelia’s voice sounded behind them and, as Faith turned around, she hit her across the head with a baseball bat. “Keep your hands off my boyfriend.”

“Oh, thank God,” Xander exhaled. “I hate being the bait!”

Faith dropped to the floor, dazed for a moment, but then was ready to get back up and kill Cordelia when all of a sudden she saw two sets of shoes in front of her. One was a pair of heavy black boots framed by a black leather duster. The other was a pair of stylish, yet affordable boots that could only belong to one person. Then she didn’t see anything at all.

***

Seeing Faith was awake, Spike leaned against the wall and lit a cigarette.

Faith looked around to find a pair of black boots standing in front of her. That and chains restraining her to the wall.

“Had some nice dreams there, pet?”

Faith lunged out at him but he jerked away gracefully, grinning.

“Let me out of here, or I swear I will-“

“Temper now. We’re going to be very good friends so I think you should hold the death threats close to the chest.”

“The Mayor is going to-“

“Yes, I imagine he will,” Spike said calmly. “But let’s forget about him for the moment.”

Faith stood up warily and sounded suspicious.

“What do you want?”

Spike chuckled a little and went and sat down comfortably on the couch. They were in the mansion and Faith was encased in Dru’s chains.

“This isn’t about me, luv.” He leaned forward a bit. “Listen, I’m gonna be straight with you. Slayer told me you like it when people are real with you and you don’t have to wonder about their motives. Well, here’s mine: I don’t care a bloody lick about you. You could die right in front of me here and I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it.”

Faith glared at him, while at the same time, seemed to appreciate his honesty.

Spike continued.

“Only reason I’m here is cause I made a deal with the Slayer to help her and this is what she wants help with. So we’re stuck together and you might as well cooperate, or sit there using up all your energy to try and get out of those chains. Whichever works for me.”

Faith laughed bitterly.

“Why in the world would B. trust you with me, her little killer?”

“Well, who better to help one?” Spike said shortly. This little exchange would be challenging and he liked that but if she didn’t change her tune soon, it wouldn’t be quite as much fun anymore and he’d get bored real quick.

“Cause you’re a reformed killer?” Faith asked sarcastically.

“Cause I am a killer,” Spike said seriously, a real chill in his tone. Faith looked up at the sound and he could see she knew he meant what he said. “If there’s one thing I know, it’s evil. That and what it’s like to kill. Now I may not have a soul like you do, but I still know the rush, the thrill and the power of it all. It’s got quite a kick to it and there’s no time like the first time. Though from what I understand you’re pretty seasoned, right on up to two known killings.” Spike’s tone was mocking.

“What’s so funny about that?” Faith sounded seriously upset now.

“You’re a bloody child,” he scoffed. “You’re a little girl who all of a sudden got the keys to the car thrust in her hand and took it out for a joyride and now think you’re the biggest bad in the land. You know nothing about real bad, little one. But you will soon if you let it eat you up. And it will, trust me on that. Got eaten quite literally myself. I can’t come back from it. I shouldn’t. But we demons got no need for humans running around trying to imitate us because they can’t control themselves.” Spike leaned in closer. “And you will regret it because you still have that soul of yours. Yeah, it’s stained, it’s shoved away in a closet, but it’s there and, when the dark has swallowed you up, it will finish the job.”

Faith lunged at him again, raging at his scornful words. But Spike just laughed at her and walked out of the room.

 

***

I was waiting outside the mansion when I heard Spike laugh and walk towards me.

“What happened?” I asked anxiously.

“She’s doing the bitter child act,” he said. “Ready to patrol?”

“Spike! Give me some details before I kill you.”

“Already dead,” he murmured before giving me what I asked for and related the conversation he’d had with Faith.

“That’s it? What good is that going to do?” I asked.

“Look, Slayer,” Spike said shortly, “you asked for my help, to help the rogue come back from the dark side. I’m doing it the way I know how so leave it alone already. She’s still a little girl, just like you are.” Well, I like that. Being, like, a one hundred and fifty doesn’t make him Maturity Decider. “She’s taken a hold of something and it’s exciting and addicting and she doesn’t know what to do with it and all I’m doing is help her see where it leads and make her examine herself. That satisfy you, Slayer or do we need to give her cookies and hot tea?”

“I get it, Spike,” I snapped. “Stop acting like you’re all that.”

“Oh, but I am, luv,” he smirked. “Can we patrol now?”

“Yes, but someone needs to watch her,” I pointed out. Now who’s thinking about things, Mr. Mature? Oh yeah, I'm on top of everything.

“I’m gonna leave Dru here,” he said. “She’s not well enough to hunt.”

“I’m not leaving the two crazy people here alone,” I said.

“Then leave someone else too,” Spike said. “I couldn’t care less.”

“I will,” I said. But who? I wasn’t about to let any of my friends stay here with Faith. She was strong and something could happen. Not to mention the carnage Drusilla could reek if she took it into her head to do it, even if she couldn't feed. But Giles was researching the Drusilla problem and if I mentioned him Spike would have a fit and I didn’t wanna deal with his particular drama right then.

“I’ll have Wesley come over,” I finally said. “The two of them should be able to handle it.”

Spike smiled. I wanted to wipe it off his smug face, but decided to just leave it alone.

“Let’s go then, Slayer.”

“Make sure she’s secure,” I said. “Faith is strong.”

“Why yes, mother,” he said sarcastically.

I wanted to scream. Spike really needs to be dusted soon.

***

Spike strode back into the room with Wesley and Drusilla. Faith looked up and laughed at the sight, but Spike saw that she had been thinking.

“Well,” he said, “I have got to run but I’m leaving you here with these two for awhile. I hope you all have a very good time. Wesley here is quite the Watcher and I know he’ll have all sorts of Council lectures to give you. Dru here, on the other hand, is all sorts of evil so just watch her and see what your future holds.”

“I’m the example,” Drusilla said proudly.

Wesley quivered as he watched Faith, but he took a crossbow and a dagger and sat down on the couch. Drusilla floated over to Faith and pulled up her face to look at it. Faith jerked backwards.

“Oh, I do like her eyes so, Spike,” Drusilla said. “Can I have them?”

“No, not today, Dru,” Spike said regretfully, pulling her close. “We’ll get to that some other time. Now listen closely, love. I don’t want you to go near the Slayer. You can talk to her all you like, but don’t unchain her or do anything she says. If she gets loose let her kill the Watcher before trying to come at you. Have you got that, baby?”

Drusilla pouted a little.

“Spike thinks I’ve forgotten the rules,” she said to no one in particular. “But I’m the whip, all ready.” Drusilla turned back to Spike and made a good imitation of a whip crack. “Run and play, my William. I feel a good silence coming where I’ll do my part.”

“Now look here,” Wesley started to say, “I don’t think that’s quite the team spi-“

He stopped as he saw that Spike and Drusilla weren’t listening to him.

“Listen well, pet,” Spike told Faith and then walked out the door, pausing to wink at Wesley.

 

***

Wesley, left alone with a rogue Slayer and a crazy vampress, made himself as small as possible. Faith glowered and settled into a brooding silence. Drusilla floated out of the room and Wesley visibly relaxed a little, but then she came back in again holding a doll with its eyes bound up and a tea set.

“It’s time for tea,” she said smiling and placed the set down on the table in front of the couch. Sitting on the ground, she placed a cup in front of herself, one for Wesley, one for Faith and one for the doll.

“For him who couldn’t possibly.” She handed Wesley a bit of bread soaked in blood. He just stared blankly at her. “For Miss Edith who’s been so very bad lately.” Drusilla put more bread in front of the doll. “I shall never eat bread, only the years,” she said to herself and put no bread on her own plate. “Does she want some?” she asked Faith, who recoiled.

“Are you insane?” she asked.

“Of course,” Drusilla answered. “You’re coming to join me.” And she laughed a little.

“Like hell,” Faith spat.

“Such pretty flames come out her mouth,” Dru told Wesley and then drained her tea cup of blood before breaking the cup, causing Wesley to jump, and, taking one of the pieces of jagged china, started ripping holes in the doll.

Faith stared at her in amazement and some trepidation. This was one crazy vampire lady. She had to get out of here before she did go insane. Pushing Spike’s words to the back of her mind, Faith stood up again and started testing her chains out. She quickly found the flaw in them and started pounding it against the wall, not even trying to be subtle about it.

“I would stop that if I were you,” Wesley said, obviously trying to keep the quivering out of his voice.

“Watcha gonna do about it, English?” she asked without ceasing her pounding.

“This,” he said and aimed the crossbow at her leg and fired. Wesley seemed to be an excellent shot and at such close range he could not have missed. Faith cried out and banged against the wall. “I’m sorry I had to do that,” Wesley said, “but you’re much too dangerous to be let loose and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to keep you here.”

“But, Wes, is it?” Faith said, getting back to her feet and showing him the cracked chains, “you’re the one who set me free.”

Wesley hurriedly loaded another bolt into the crossbow and tried to keep her from breaking loose, but just as he fired Faith’s chains split open and though the second bolt hit her left hand she didn’t slow down, but ripped it out and jumped over the couch to where Wesley stood with his dagger. Drusilla giggled and clapped her hands, enjoying the show.

“Love to stay,” Faith said, grasping the crossbow bolt in her hand and slamming it into Wesley’s leg while he vainly tried to fend her off with his dagger. “But I got evil things to do.”

Wesley screamed and Faith ran out the door into the night.

***

Wesley slumped to the floor, panting, and gauged his wound. Pulling it out would only cause him to lose more blood so he left the painful thing inside his leg and tried to stand up.

Drusilla laughed.

“Such a lovely smell. You’re quite the party favor.” Wesley looked in horror at his blood soaked pants and scrambled to his feet and limped for the door as fast as he could. Drusilla made no move to follow him but sniffed and said to herself, “Nobody likes my tea parties.”

***

Giles was at the library researching. Normally this would have delighted him, but the subject matter was certainly distasteful. Most things that were involved in vampire draining spells contained dark magic that reminded him too much of his past. He was having trouble concentrating, thinking about Faith and the Mayor and how Buffy was doing. The two of them had made much progress and she was almost back to the level of trust she’d previously held in him but it wasn’t all the way there yet and he felt that gap every moment, hating himself for having caused it.

Giles sighed. Thinking about things wasn’t going to make the repugnant work go by any faster so he buckled down and made himself concentrate.

Shortly thereafter he grabbed a pad of paper and pencil, sure that he was onto something.

“Yes,” he mumbled to himself. “When Willow and I examined her aura, we found those same orange traces. This is most certainly it. A curse originating from the Rinaldi clan of ancient Italy when their village was attacked by vampires in the late 12th century…” Giles continued on like that for awhile scribbling down notes furiously. “Oh dear,” he finally said looking down at his sheets, “Spike won’t be pleased about that at all.”

Just then Wesley burst through the door as fast as a limping man could go. Giles looked up, shocked at the young man with a crossbow bolt through his leg, bleeding and obviously in great pain.

“Wesley!” he said, hurrying over to him. “Come, sit down.” Giles got him to a chair. He knelt down and examined the wound quickly and then went into the office and called 911. “Tell me what happened,” he said.

Wesley caught his breath and told him about Buffy wanting him to watch Faith with Drusilla and then his trying to restrain her and her getting loose.

“Mr. Giles,” Wesley said, bowing his head, “I must confess I find myself in over my head here in Sunnydale. This isn’t quite like what Watcher work was described to me as. I know I did the wrong thing back there and am responsible for letting a murderer loose. I don’t know quite what to do. I am so very sorry and I wanted to help so much and I just buggered the whole thing up.”

Wesley was quite obviously a little delirious from the pain, but Giles could tell his remorse was sincere.

“Don’t talk such rubbish, Wesley,” Giles said briskly staunching the blood flow and seeing it wouldn’t be a good idea to take the bolt out until the medic team arrived. “You’ve made mistakes, yes, and been quite a blueberry scone about the whole thing, but you were just holding to the training you had received and a little jolt of reality is just the thing for you. Now, I’m going to get you to the hospital and I want you to forget the drivel you’ve been spouting which sounds something very much like your father would say.” Wesley started in surprise, even through the pain. “Yes, I know your father and I must admit I am surprised at how different to him you are. You should be quite proud of the fact, really.”

The emergency team rushed into the room and loaded Wesley onto a stretcher. Wesley started breathing more easily and sounded very British when he said thank you to Giles as they wheeled him away. Giles looked after him for a minute and then scribbled a note for Buffy on the table before gathering up his notes and then rushing off to the mansion where he was sure Buffy would return when she’d finished her patrol.

 

***

Spike and I actually had a great patrol. No really, I’m so not joking. We killed lots of things. In my more lucid, yet never admitting to it moments, I know Spike and I work as a great team. It’s a shame about that whole him being evil thing. But the team thing vanished the minute we got back to the mansion and found that his crazy lady and my wimpy Watcher had let Faith break loose. I was about to throttle Drusilla, but something in Spike’s eyes decided me against. So I just ranted at her until Spike stopped me and took her into the other room, because apparently she was getting upset. Oh no, that’s awful.

“Buffy,” Giles’ voice came from behind me.

“Giles, Faith is gone,” I said. “When I catch up to Wesley I’m going to-“

“Wesley is in the hospital,” Giles told me. “Faith stabbed him with a crossbow bolt and he lost a lot of blood. He came to me when it happened and I know he tried his best so don’t be too hard on him.”

“Good Watchers are so hard to come by these days,” Spike drawled as he came back into the room with Drusilla. I actually agreed with him.

“We need to find Faith,” I settled on saying. “She’s probably really mad right about now.”

“She was listening, Slayer,” Spike told me. “She’ll have thinking to do.”

“And healing,” Giles said. “Wesley shot her twice before she escaped.”

“Watcher’s got spine,” Spike approved. “There’s a faint blood trail I can probably track.”

“She loves the ships,” Drusilla suddenly said. “They make her think about being free.”

Spike and I looked at her.

“The smell does seem to lead towards the docks,” Spike said slowly.

“Ok, I’m going,” I said and turned to leave.

“Shouldn’t Spike go with you?” Giles asked. “She could be dangerous.”

“No,” I said. “I’ve been sending everybody to face her except me and aren’t I the one who’s supposed to be helping her?”

I turned to leave. As I went I heard Spike asking Giles conversationally,

“So there, Watcher, how’s the research coming?”

Giles shuffled awkwardly.

“Uh, yes, Spike. About that…”

I hurried toward the docks, wanting to fix the mess that I had gotten myself into. In wanting to help Faith I’d probably just pushed her further away. Go me. Well, that was my typical way of dealing with things, making it worse. No sense in doing it differently this time.

When I reached the docks I found Faith sitting on crates overlooking the water.

“Faith,” I said, stopping short of where she was sitting.

“Buffy,” Faith said, standing up and turning around, “back for more fun?”

“Faith, what happened, I’m really sorry. I was trying to help you.”

She laughed.

“What, by kidnapping me and turning the crossbow happy Watcher loose?”

“That wasn’t supposed to happen. Okay, the kidnapping was,” I admitted. “But the shooting definitely not.”

“Well, it did happen.” Faith waved blood sprinkled fingers at me. “And, boy, was it helpful.”

“I just wanted you to see-“

She cut me off.

“What you wanted me to see was you prancing around being all perfect and hypocritical with your vampire buddies and moral uptightness in the hopes that I could come back and be your little sidekick,” Faith snapped, jumping down from the crates until she was standing in front of me. “But I won’t. I’ll never be under your shadow again.”

With my peripheral vision I saw the box falling and reacting instantly, pushed Faith out of the way before darkness crashed down on me.

Opening my eyes again I saw Faith battling two vampires while a third stood over me. I tried to move but the box was heavy and I would have to strain to lift it. Why do all my days have to end so perfectly? I ask myself pointless questions sometimes. The box lifted about two inches before the vamp stamped his foot down on it and I winced as another wave of pain swept through me.

I pushed my hand out from under the box and grabbed his foot, causing him to fall. Without him on the box I managed to shove it just enough that I could roll out from under it. As soon as I was out he grabbed me and slammed me up against the box. I hit my head and almost blacked out again, enough for him to be able to start snacking on me, but all of a sudden there was nothing but a burst of dust.

It cleared and Faith’s form in Slayer stance with stake upheld became clear.

“You saved me,” I said.

And admitting I was actually saved was a big thing for me. I just want everybody to know that.

“Well, you know that thing about me getting to kill you and only me,” Faith quipped lightly.

“That’s what Spike always says,” I said breathlessly.

“Smart guy,” she said and started to walk away.

“Faith.” I started forward.

“Later, B.”

Faith walked away from me and I didn’t try to stop her again. I guess I’d done enough damage for one evening.

***

As Faith walked away she cursed under her breath. This entire evening had been a nightmare. First, she’d been stupid enough to get herself kidnapped, then she’d had to endure Spike’s lecturing and watch that crazy vampress play with her dolls, then she got shot, then Buffy had to try to save her again, and then of all things she saved Buffy!

“I need to hole up and heal a little,” she muttered. “I can’t let the Mayor know about this. Those weren’t his vamps so I’m probably safe, but I gotta be careful.”

Unbidden, Drusilla’s words came to mind.

“You’re coming to join me.”

Faith shuddered. She knew that the vampress was psychic.

“You’re a bloody child...But it’s there and when the dark has swallowed you up, it will finish the job.” Spike’s words also chilled her to the bone.

“I made up my mind,” Faith shouted suddenly, tired of the inner conflict. “I’ll take my consequences. Leave me alone! The child is going to grow up!”

***

In her room at the mansion, Drusilla sat crooning to the wall. She suddenly stiffened and put her head back.

“So be it. Dark is coming to swallow you whole,” she sang and clapped her hands gleefully.


	8. In Which There is Misdirection

Spike slammed open the door of the bedroom he and Drusilla were residing in, cracking the wall, and stormed into the room.

“The storms have gathered,” Drusilla observed from her spot in the middle of the bed. Her pale skin looked paler than usual and her eyes, so enormous even normally, seemed to stretch out over her whole face. The sight of her seemed to ire Spike even more and he picked up a chair and flung it against the wall, dodging the wooden splinters as they came flying back at him.

“Bloody brilliant,” he shouted in frustration.

“Cat can’t play with you, Spike,” Drusilla told him. “He’s made out of a different colour.”

“I know, love,” he said growling. “But your time’s running out and the cat better play if he wants to keep his head.”

“I’m going to make you have joy,” Drusilla said and started humming. “Run and catch, run and catch, the lamb is caught in the blackb’ry patch.” Spike sent a sick smile her way, but continued to pace in frustration. “I’m strong today,” Drusilla informed him, as if trying to cheer him up another way. “Come live in my house and you’ll feel better.”

Spike’s mouth turned up and he started a slow smirk making his way to her side.

“Do you love me, Dru?”

“I love what I made,” she answered. “I love.” Then for no reason, Drusilla started to cry. “I love, I love, I love,” she whimpered. “Love is what I am but no one sees. They all think I’m a snake but I do love you!” she finally gasped out as if the effort to say something concrete had been almost too much for her to bear. But Spike’s face lit up as she said it and he pounced on her, raining kisses over her. Drusilla’s delighted laughter soon rang from the bed and all sounds of crying were lost.

Later that night Spike finished buckling up his jeans and stroked the back of the still naked Drusilla on the bed who had fallen asleep from exhaustion.

“I shouldn’t have pushed you so hard, baby,” he whispered. “But I’m going out to get you a nice meal so sleep well while I’m gone.” With that Spike swung his duster over his shoulders and went out to hunt.

He avoided the Bronze knowing Buffy and her friends were planning on being there tonight. Instead, he went to the mall where it would just be closing and all the young people who hung out there would be leaving. Snatching two teenagers leaning against their car, Spike dragged them behind the building and drained one, reveling in the fresh kill and the fear coming into his mouth along with the blood. The girls were young and that would be good for Drusilla. He finished the one and gripping the other, started to take her back for his lady.

They were about a block away from the mansion when Faith’s voice rang out behind him. Spike wasn’t startled, he’d noticed her following, but decided Drusilla needed to feed more than Buffy needed to catch Faith.

“Does B know you’re doing that?”

“She doesn’t ask and I don’t tell,” Spike said, turning around and keeping his grip on the girl who stared at Faith with frightened eyes.

“Please help me!” she stammered out.

Faith rolled her eyes.

“Doesn’t anyone around here get that I’m actually evil?”

Spike scoffed at her.

“Please, pet. Don’t start that again. All you are is on your way.”

“I had enough of the mind trip last time, Blondie,” Faith said. “Not really in for a repeat lesson tonight.”

“Then I suppose you’re just here cause you missed me so much,” Spike asked sarcastically.

Faith chuckled at the idea, but started to move in closer to him.

“Well, you are pretty hot and I’ve always been rather curious to try out Buffy’s little obsession with the undead. See what all the fuss was, you know?” Faith started to move in closer. Spike didn’t move an inch. “I know you’re still tripping with the evil, Spike,” Faith said. She pointed to the girl. “She makes that pretty obvious.”

“Never denied it,” Spike replied, still not moving.

“Then why don’t you play it?” she asked. “I can hook you up with the best evil in this town and a lot of fun along the way.” She reached up and slipped her hand inside his duster.

Spike laughed and taking her hand, put it off of his person.

“Nice try, luv. But I’ve got all the evil in a girl that I need. Bloody come up with something better than you if you want me. Besides, I don’t play well with others.”

Faith looked like she’d been slapped but then a cruel smile lit her face and she made her way in the opposite direction.

Spike turned and headed toward the mansion where he entered their bedroom with the girl and threw her across the room to land in Drusilla’s lap.

“Oh, Spike.” Drusilla leapt up and danced across the room to him, dragging the girl by her hair. “I get the best presents. It fills me with colours. You’re my knight who saves me.”

“Always,” he replied and kissed her deeply before snapping the girl’s neck, lighting up a cigarette and letting her enjoy her meal.

“Definitely all the evil I need,” he said softly, smiling at Drusilla as she flashed blood stained fangs at him.

***

“It’s a good plan, Faith,” the Mayor said approvingly. “My, but you’re an enterprising young woman, just the type I need.” He got up from his desk chair and absently wiped his hands with the moist towelettes he kept on a table in his office. “Now, I think I know just the right fellow to work this deal. I’ll have to summon him tonight and see what we can do. Too bad, I was going to practice my long shot tonight, but this does seem more important.”

The Mayor smiled at Faith and she tried her best to react well but she was still stinging from Spike’s words.

“What’s the matter, Faith? Someone with such a bright young future as you ought to be beaming at this moment. You know, you have such a pretty smile.”

Faith did smile at that, a little.

“I just, well, why doesn’t anybody pick me?” she asked. “It’s always gotta be about somebody else.”

The Mayor pondered that for a little while and then squatted down next to her chair.

“Well, I don’t know about anybody else,” he said, “but I picked you and so far it’s the only choice any logical, soulless man could have made!” He ended with a chuckle.

Faith ducked her head and when she lifted it again she truly smiled.

“Thanks, boss.”

 

***

I was patrolling through the cemetery and I bumped into a vamp. Normal right? I mean, Slayer, cemetery, it usually means vampire. But this one was terrified. Scary creatures of the night should only look that way when they’re looking at me.

“Leave me alone, Slayer,” he shouted. “I’m not harming anyone, in fact, I’m leaving.”

“Getting to be a little too much for ya?” I asked. “Living in the same town with the Slayer?”

“No, living in the town that’s got an Ascension planned!” he said, circling a tombstone.

“Ascens-a what?” I asked.

“Come on, don’t tell me you haven’t heard of it?” he asked unbelieving.

“Really haven’t,” I said. But why was that ringing a bell?

“I knew I was right to be more concerned about the Mayor than you,” he said. “He’s got you blinded!”

I cornered him against a mausoleum and rammed a stake through his heart.

“I guess you were wrong again,” I said to his dust.

“He might have had more info to share, pet,” Spike drawled in my ear.

“Spike, I am so not in the mood,” I said, walking away.

“You know,” he said, falling into step with me, “there’s one little word I keep hearing wherever I go in this town. Can you imagine what that could be?”

“Ascension,” I said. I was taking a wild stab at it really. Must be Slayer intuition.

“Wonderful deduction, luv,” Spike praised. Praised in a totally not praising way, I mean.

“So?” I asked. “What’s that got to do with us?”

“Well, everyone’s scared to death of it, but funny thing is nobody will talk about it either. It’s the Mayor’s little plan and I’m betting you’ll want to find out more about it.”

“Let’s talk to Giles,” I said, moving back toward the entrance of the cemetery.

“I got my own little talk to have with him,” Spike said in a low voice.

I glanced at him but didn’t ask. Some things I just really didn’t want to know.

 

***

 

I arrived at school next day to find Spike and Giles arguing. From the looks of it, it had been going on for some time.

“You got no respect for me and mine, Watcher!” Spike shouted. “Granted you’re not supposed to, but your Slayer made this deal with me and you had better find a way to do this so that I keep on upholding my end of the sodding bargain or you will wake up without a head tomorrow morning!”

“Maybe Giles isn’t always the best of men,” I said dryly, walking into the office, “but he’s still my not best man, so hands off, Spike.”

“Your rules, Slayer,” Spike growled. “Just get those things and get them any bloody way possible!”

“What’s he all cranky about?” I asked.

“He’ll explain it to you, using way too big of words, I’m sure,” Spike said, actually flouncing out of the room.

I turned to Giles.

“Explain-y.”

Giles sighed.

“There are a number of things. Chiefly what Spike is so concerned about is that I have figured out the cure for Drusilla.”

“Yay us with our bargain upholding,” I said.

“It’s not quite that simple,” Giles said, taking off his glasses.

“It never is,” I answered.

“Quite,” he agreed. “Our problem is that the ingredients required for the reversal spell are from a totally archaic society which doesn’t exist anymore. The basic things I have, the slightly more exotic could be acquired from the magic shop quite easily, but there are one or two items which simply aren’t around anymore. To put it frankly-“

“We can’t be bargain upholding,” I finished.

“Yes. Spike, understandably, is quite upset, but that isn’t the half of it. Events have occurred that require some serious action. I have explained the matter to Spike, but I’ll relay them to you as well.”

I sat back with a sigh and prepared to listen. Well, try to anyway.

 

***

 

A couple of hours later the gang had all gathered in the library and we briefed them on what was going on.

“Serious action,” Xander said.

“No duh, Xander,” Cordelia said, obviously still a little ticked with him over the Faith incident.

“What do we do, Buffy?” Willow asked.

“Serious research mode, Will,” I told her. “We need to find out everything we possibly can on the Ascension and what the Mayor is up to. Can you hack into his files or his records or anything of his?”

Willow shook her head.

“I tried doing that back when we first found out about him, but I guess Faith must’ve told him about me or something because when I got through his encryptions there just weren’t any files there. Not sure if I’m supposed to be proud about that or upset,” Willow frowned.

Oz took her hand.

“Be proud,” he advised.

She smiled at him.

“I can try again,” she told me.

I nodded.

“Do that. Also, be on the lookout for anything you can find about the

Ascension. Everyone else, let’s hit the books and see what an Ascension is, because apparently...” I turned to look at Giles and Wesley who looked slightly embarrassed. “...the two Watchers here, have no idea what it means.

“It’s not exactly a very usual term in demonology,” Wesley protested.

“Whatever. Guys,” I said, “just keep looking. We’ve got a lot of stuff going on right now. Spike’s out trying to get info from the local demons and I’ve got a chem test in fifteen minutes.” Wesley stopped me as I turned to go.

“You’re messing with powerful forces, Buffy. Are you certain you are doing the right thing?”

“I know nature will never be the same after my chem test, but, hey, I figure it’s better than demony things,” I quipped.

Wesley’s face grew even more serious, if that was possible.

“That’s not quite what I meant, Buffy.”

“I know,” I said, turning and walking out. “Relax, Wes, Slayer knows best.”

 

***

 

Spike hated seeing Drusilla like this. She did look dead. She lay unmoving in the center of their bed dressed in what looked like a black shroud. Her chest did not rise and fall and her pale, thin arms were folded over her breast, her eyelids were closed in rest. But she was so thin and so pale and so weak. With the uttermost pain, Spike turned away from her and closed the door, locking it and going into the central part of the mansion.

He’d been idly sucking on some leftovers when Faith entered the mansion and threw a bottle of something at him.

“Bloody hell!” he shouted as the liquid plastered itself to his skin. “What the hell is that?”

“Something better than me,” she answered and gave him a quick smile before fixing her attention over his shoulder. Spike glanced around and Faith smiled with satisfaction as he looked horrified.

A figure had stepped into the room. It was dressed entirely in black with black cloth encircling the head and mouth. Only bluish skin and glaring yellow eyes could be seen. Sparks danced from the pointed fingertips and they flowed over to Spike and clung to him as the liquid did. Spike started to run, but found he couldn’t move. Faith continued to grin as she watched him struggle.

The figure stepped forward and deep, sonorous words came from the mouth though they were indistinguishable. Lights flooded from him and swirled around him before striking at Spike and flooding his brain. He shouted again and then as suddenly as they started, the lights all went out. Spike dropped to the floor. The figure melted away as it had come and Faith was alone with the vampire on the floor.

“Spike, can ya hear me?” she asked.

“I hear you,” Spike answered in a dull monotone.

“Stand up,” she said softly. He stood up. “Turn around,” she continued. He turned around. “Now that’s just a bit more like it,” Faith exalted. “No more high and mighty undead, just a sorry looking punk who takes direct orders from me.” Faith circled around Spike who didn’t move a muscle and continued staring straight ahead. “I’m liking it,” Faith said again and prodded Spike on the shoulder. He didn’t move. “Okay, we’re going to get little Buffy over here and take care of the boss’ orders. Spike, listen to me very carefully because if you screw this up, it’s dust for your sorry ass.”

Spike still didn’t say anything, just stood there, listening to Faith.

 

***

I was in the kitchen grabbing some me and Mom time when Spike came barging into the house. Somehow whenever I’m doing something non-Slayer-y, he always comes in and brings bad news. One of these days I’m gonna stake the messenger.

“Got a little surprise for you at the mansion, pet,” he said, leaning against the counter like a cat. “Hello, Joyce. Lovely hair.”

“Thank you, Spike,” Mom said, warming up to him like always. Sometimes I wonder where I get my brains.

“What is it, Spike?” I asked.

“Got a demon who’s all willing to spill about the Ascension problem we got. Figured you’d wanna be there when it happens.”

Unfortunately, he figured right.

“Let’s go,” I sighed. “Bye, Mom.”

“Later, Joyce,” Spike said charmingly. Mom almost swooned. Remind me to interrogate Spike later about his intentions toward my Mom seeing as how he flirts with her like he isn’t over a hundred and, oh yeah, dead.

Spike was irritating as ever on the walk over to the mansion and I fell into my habit of ignoring him until we got there. We walked into an empty room.

“Where is he?” I asked, looking around for any signs of escape.

“Locked him in here,” Spike answered, pointing to a little room off the side. “Less chance of any funny business.”

“It’s got brains,” I said to the air and opened the door. A hand holding a damp cloth covered my mouth and I gasped for air as the unmistakable smell of chloroform flooded my senses and I couldn’t see anymore.

 

***

 

Wesley was heading up a small research meeting at the Hall of Records which Oz had suggested they visit for information on the Mayor, which had been unanimously agreed upon, and which Willow had grinned largely over because of the double pleasure of Oz’s brainy success and her own chance of discovery of something new.

Heading up might be an overstatement though considering that the others were mostly ignoring Wesley.

“This is the most boring way I can think of to spend my Saturday night.” Cordelia sighed.

“Cor, it’s important,” Xander reminded her.

“Not to me,” she said and reopened her book.

“Check it out,” Oz said coming over to the table.

“An interesting tidbit of helpful information?” Wesley asked eagerly.

Oz looked at him.

“Well, I’d call it interesting,” he answered. He showed them his book which had a photo from 1899 of the Mayor of Sunnydale.

“Like father, like son,” Wesley whispered in amazement.

“Exact same guy, like exact same guy,” Oz corrected.

Willow nodded as they all stared at the photo which was the Mayor, but taken a hundred years ago.

“So...not human then?” Cordelia asked from her position at the table.

“Thinking so,” Xander replied. “Unless he got some extra health plan the rest of us didn’t get.”

 

***

It hurt to open my eyes. I knew I wouldn’t want to do it but I opened them anyway. I’m stupid that way.

“Morning, sunshine,” Faith greeted me.

Spike stepped back from the manacles he’d placed around my wrist.

“What a surprise,” I said. “Spike being evil. Guess I should’ve seen that one coming.”

“Don’t get your hopes up, B,” Faith assured me. “I don’t think Spike’s acting under his own ideas though maybe he’s just into taking orders from hot chicks with superpowers.” Faith turned to Spike who had resumed his position of standing still and staring straight ahead. “Spike, what can we have you do that will convince Buffy here that you’re not evil and just doing what I tell you to do?”

“Well, he could drain you for starters,” I suggested cheerfully.

“Real cute,” Faith said. “Spike, give me twenty,” she said.

Spike dropped and started doing twenty pushups.

“Nice to watch, isn’t he?” Faith said. “I think after we’ve tortured you for some long hours I’ll make him stake his undead bride and become my personal sex slave, but we’ll see what the Mayor says about that.”

“Do whatever you like to him,” I answered. “But why me, why this? Why, Faith?”

She turned away from me and picked up a long knife and walked over to me and trailed it down my face.

“You lock me up, I lock you up. I love returning favors.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” I told her.

Faith jammed the knife into the wall an inch from my face.

“It’s all about you, ain’t it, B? All about why poor little Buffy has things happen to her.” Faith turned away and then punched me. My face stung, but I didn’t move. “Well, newsflash! It ain’t about you! I come to this town and I do my job kicking ass better than anybody. But who do I hear about? Buffy. So, I play along, I’m the good girl; but still everybody wants me to be like you!” Faith kicked me in the stomach and I hunched over from the blow. “But did anybody ask if you couldn’t be more like me!” she screamed at me.

“Why would I lower myself that much?” I finally said, hurt to the core at the things she was saying to me. “I was your friend, Faith. I was even jealous of you when you first came because you were the new exciting Slayer who wrestled alligators and slept in the nude and didn’t have any responsibilities. But I was there for you, Faith, and I thought you were there for me, but you refused to trust me and when I wanted to help you, you spat in my face!”

“Trust,” Faith said scornfully. “Now there’s a funny word. Why would I trust someone who doesn’t trust me?”

“Well, after all,” I said, “you’ve shown yourself so worthy of being trusted. Who does trust you? Who do you trust? The Mayor? There’s an exhibition of brains for you!” I taunted her.

“Don’t you dare start on him,” Faith warned me. “I’ve never trusted anyone like I trust him and you can’t turn me against him.”

“Oh, I’m done helping you,” I said. “You will be just as finished as he is when I’m done.”

“You can’t win here, B,” Faith told me smiling. “It’s all said and settled and you lost. Come Graduation Day, your little friends are gonna be kibbles and bits and I will be at his right hand. Assuming he has hands after the  
transformation,” she added as an afterthought. “I’m not too clear on that point. But now,” she said, “it’s playtime.”

Grabbing the knife out of the wall she unbuttoned my sleeve and readied for her first incision. I decided it was time.

Before she could touch me, I pulled my hands free of the wall and punched her away from me.

“Spike, get her!” Faith shouted as she redoubled to face me.

“I could, but I’m paralyzed with not caring very much,” Spike informed her, leaning against the wall. “Oh and, by the way, I think I’ll wear the pants from now on too.”

Faith glanced from me to Spike and back again.

“Psyche!” I said cheerfully.

“You played me!” she screamed.

“What should a player expect but to be played?” I asked.

Faith and I prepared for a knock down drag out fight and I flipped over her head to grab one of the wicked looking instruments she had prepared for me. Turning back to face her, she swept out a leg and tripped me up and on my way down I did the same for her. We landed with our knives held at each other’s throats.

We stared at each other for a long moment. We both had traces of tears on our cheeks.

“You kill me; you become me,” she said with a grin and, knocking my knife aside, ran out the door.

I straightened up and dropped the knife.

“Uh, thank you, Spike?” Spike prompted from beside me.

“Shut up, Spike,” I said instead and walked out the door myself.

 

***

Later on at the library, the gang all gathered and we exchanged the info we had learned on our separate missions. Nearing the end, I felt a strange tingle at the back of my neck and looked up. There was a black clad blue guy standing there who apparently had a nifty way of getting around.

“The debt between us is restored,” he informed Giles. “Do not call upon me again.”

“I won’t,” Giles assured him. “And thank you for coming to me. Peace be with you.”

“And with you, Rupert Giles,” Mystery Guy said and dissipated.

“What’d you do for him?” Willow asked, curious as always.

“I introduced him to his wife,” Giles answered.

Willow sat back, a new concept for her. I allowed myself a moment of Willow fondness before getting back to the matter at hand. Or rather I was rudely brought back to the matter at hand by Spike barging in and asking for news about Drusilla’s cure.

“Uh yes,” Giles fumbled around. “I have started collecting the required ingredients. The slightly more rare are being shipped here but I still am having no luck in finding the items that I’m convinced no longer exist.”

“Well, look harder!” Spike growled. “I’m bloody sick and tired of playing this game with you children. You’re lucky that mind control doesn’t work on vampires or I would’ve wiped all of you out gladly!”

So saying, he swept out. I was suddenly reminded that Spike was evil and had almost killed me several times.  
Maybe I should really try to honor my deals with the devil before he turned on me. Just don’t tell any of that to Spike. Cause, duh.

 

***

Spike unlocked Dru’s door and entered with two beautiful girls in his arms. Drusilla had not moved since he’d locked her in to keep her from giving up the game with Faith and to keep her safe. He hated having had to do that to her and hoped the two fresh girls would get her strength back up and help her forgive him.

“Spike’s been naughty,” she hissed from her position without opening her eyes. “I see into his endeavors.”

“Brought you playmates, Dru,” Spike enticed.

Dru sat up and walking slowly over to him, ran her nails over one of the girls’ face.

“You are pardoned,” she told him firmly, “but no cakes today.”

“All right, love.” Spike took his punishment and pushed the girls towards her. “Have a little playtime first before dinner. I’ll supervise.”

“Who’s the older here?” Drusilla inquired idly.

The smaller of the girls started whimpering and Drusilla matched her whimper for whimper before laying her on the ground and stabbing her idly with her nails. Small screams started to rise from the floor and Spike felt his bloodlust rising with them. He could barely restrain himself from joining her and showing his ardor for her mad games. He abstained, reminding himself these were for her and that she needed them. So he watched and Drusilla played and the night dragged on.


	9. In Which Spike and I Argue.  A Lot.

Giles and I were at the hospital witnessing the release of Wesley who looked absolutely pathetic in his wheelchair as we wheeled him out. I planned to bring that up on future occasions of course. He’d gotten a mild concussion and a cracked rib during a foray into the cemetery on a routine training patrol the previous night.

We took him to his apartment and then left with his assurances of being back up to training me in no time at all. Giles drove me home. The silence was uncomfortable because Giles and I still weren’t really okay. Not that either of us was saying anything. It still hurt what he had done to me. But I knew why he had done it and I also knew what he’d done to repair the damage. I could forgive that.

But not yet. He wasn’t pressing me, Giles-like, and I wondered when I’d have the unction to finally tell him we were okay. In the meantime, he would be training me now that Wesley was out for a few days and maybe the time together would bring us together again, I hoped.

“Goodbye, Buffy,” Giles told me. “Rest well.”

“Research well,” I told him in return. I got a wry smile back. I shut the car door and walked into my house. The time would be soon.

***

But not as of a couple of days later. I was in the library half heartedly studying in the stacks when I heard voices. I peeked around the shelves and spotted Xander and Cordelia. I would like to state for the record that I don’t normally eavesdrop, but they were talking about me.

“She’s not doing anything, Xander!” Cordelia told him. “She’s still being all broody and feeling guilty and betrayed. Her honey’s gone and her fellow Slayer is evil, her Watcher drugged her and she’s so failing English. How could she possibly beat the Mayor and keep whatever the heck an Ascension is from destroying my life and also my shoes?”

“I can’t believe you’re that shallow,” Xander replied. “And I’ve even spent my whole life seeing it.”

“This isn’t about me,” Cordelia snapped. Her face widened as she realized what she’d said. I allowed myself a moment of satisfaction.

“For once,” Xander said. “The world stands in awe.”

“My point is,” Cordelia reiterated, “that Buffy is not doing her job. There’s real evil going on and she’s not doing anything to stop it! You’re all obsessed with the perfect-ness of Buffy and can’t even see it! She’s all you ever see.”

“That’s not true,” Xander told her. “I have been known to think about you occasionally. And even in the non-projectile, vomiting type way.”

“Why do I put up with you?” she asked and turned away.

“Because I’m puppy like, charming and oh so funny?” Xander suggested weakly.

“Not even close,” she said, but smiled at him.

Apparently Cordelia’s ‘me-only limits’ had limits. Color me shocked.

Xander smiled and took her in his arms.

“I’m scared, Xander,” Cordelia said softly. “I’m just scared.”

“I know,” he said. “You always do this when you’re scared. I’m sorry I can’t help. But Buffy’s my friend and I know she’ll be able to stop this. We’ve seen her beat more evil than I ever knew existed.”

“There you go with your Buffy obsession again,” Cordelia said and kissed him.

“Right now I’m thinking about you,” Xander said. “And still in the non vomit way.”

“Good, keep it that way,” Cordelia said firmly, pulling his head down.

I decided to intervene. I can only take so much before _I'm_ thinking in the vomit way.

“Hey there,” I said, walking out from the stacks.

“Ah!” Xander jumped five feet off the floor. “Don’t use your Slayer stealth all stealthily like that!”

“How else would you suggest I use stealth?” I asked. “Besides, that was just normal Buffy walking.”

“Whatever,” Cordelia said. “I have to go to class.”

“I’d fix your lipstick beforehand,” I suggested.

Cordelia put her hands to her lips and rushed out the door. I snickered. I need more of the simple things in life. But still, the tender little scene I’d just witnessed had turned the old Buffy brain on. I couldn’t blame Cordelia for feeling that way. File that away under pigs flying. But even I wondered if I could destroy this new evil a’ brewing.

***

I gathered the Scoobies all together and made an announcement.

“I’m sick of waiting,” I told them. “We’ve been able to exploit some of the Mayor’s weaknesses and certainly have gotten things out of Faith recently, but the Mayor has all the advantages. We don’t know anything about the Ascension, what it is or what it will do. All we have is a date. I refuse to sit around and wait to be Ascended upon and hope I can stop it. I want to know what the Mayor is up to and how I can make him hurt.”

“Agreed,” Wesley said firmly. “As Slayer it is your duty to protect people and that can hardly be done by sitting around a library eating jelly-filled donuts.”

“Oh, are there any jellies left?” Giles asked eagerly, reaching into the white box Xander had brought for the meeting.

Willow started squirming uncomfortably and I sensed betrayal,

“Buffy ate three,” she said quickly.

Dang, but my Slayer senses are good!

“The point,” I intervened quickly, “is that I am going to find out what the Mayor is afraid of and dig in deep. My link is Faith, I’ll be tailing her and whatever she’s up to it’ll probably be on the Mayor’s orders. Any questions?”

“What do we do,” Xander asked, “while you and your hunky vampire go off on tail-age? We haven’t been very front line on the Slayer business much lately, Buff.”

Spike snorted, but luckily didn’t say anything though I’m sure a snarky comment about his being 'hunky' was lurking just underneath the surface.

“I always need people to research,” I told Xander. He snorted this time. Men should all be shot. “Truth is, Xan,” I said gently. “This is just reconnaissance until I know what Faith is doing; after, I’ll probably need everyone.”

“Just let us know,” he said softly and turned away.

I let out a sigh. When did life become so complicated? Oh yeah, when I became the Slayer. Funny little coincidence that.

 

***

Faith walked into the Mayor’s office and plopped down into the chair in front of his desk. He winced as she landed heavily on the furniture.

“Faith, I’ve asked you quite a few times to be careful with the furniture. It’s quite old, you know and your strength is definitely more than your estimated use of it.”

“Sorry, boss.” Faith shrugged. “I forget.”

“Well, I’m going to send you on an important assignment, see if you can remember that,” the Mayor admonished.

Faith sat up straighter in her chair, a chance for a little action perking her interest.

“That’s better,” he encouraged. “My girl needs to show off her posture.”

“Sure,” Faith said, slouching again. “Now who am I killing?”

“This is a simple retrieval job, Faith.”

“Then why am I doing it? Get one of your lackeys,” Faith complained.

“I can’t trust a lackey, Faith,” he explained. “This is something very important and vital to my Ascension. I must have it or other arrangements with our relationship will have to be made. Do you understand, young lady?”

Frightened by his tone, Faith sat up straight again.

“You got it, boss.”

He smiled brightly at her.

“Now don’t worry about it,” he reassured her. “A smart girl like you with your abilities will have no problem.”

***

Giles, Wesley, Xander, Willow, Spike and I watched Faith exit City Hall. Our Operation Cleavage Watch, as Xander coined it, had begun the day before and, so far, it had been completely boring. Oz and Cordelia had said they would stay at the library and hold the fort down and keep out watch for Giles’ supplies due to arrive and needed for Drusilla cure-age. I think Cordelia just wanted to get out of going and Oz was sweet enough to stay with her. I wondered how my two best friends ended up with such two very different people. Oh, how the thoughts wander.

We started following Faith as she got into a limo and drove in the direction of the airport. We followed in an old van Xander had dug up from somewhere. Nobody liked to ask exactly where. But from the smell, I was beginning to wish we’d asked Oz to drive.

 

***

 

Bright shadows danced madly all around her. She didn’t know where they’d come from. But they were pretty and beckoned sweetly to her. She advanced toward them and they laughed gaily and she laughed with them. She continued laughing, even as the shadows turned into something hard and sharp and bit down on her head. Harder and harder they clenched and harder she laughed until she fell to the floor and lay there giggling.

They had reflections on their surfaces, images that she couldn’t see clearly and didn’t know how to. A smile of wholesome promise hiding black nothingness and cruel fate. A white building with cracks in the walls and blood on its stones. Brown hair waving in the breeze as it plummeted downward. Flames reaching hungrily to the night sky as screams rent the air. Reptilian eyes widened in surprise and fear. A shrunken head falling to the floor and liquid splashing. A slender, silver stick with a black spire rising from the handle.

Every image brought a fresh wave of pain and a new burst of laughter. The cycle seemed to last forever.

Drusilla woke up. Her body was wracked with pain and her eyes narrowed into slits.

“Come and play, come and pay,” she hissed through fangs. “I’m a little dolly, am I?” Rising, she threw a scarlet jacket over her ivory shoulders and glided out of the door of her and Spike’s bedroom.

***

I decided to let Faith’s little operation, whatever it was, go through smoothly so that she’d be off her guard and the other party wouldn’t be able to interfere. Yeah, then Faith killed the other party, insuring that plan. She’s such a helpful little thing.

“Didn’t he fit the being evil job requirement?” I asked Faith idly, stepping out from behind some crates.

“Nah, he just messed with my style,” she said lightly, obviously assessing the situation.

“I’ll get Faith,” I warned Spike.

He laughed slightly and gestured with his hands.

“Slayer, you want her, go get her.”

“Yeah, Buffy,” Faith taunted, holding onto an ornately carved black box, “come get me.”

I ignored the couple of vamps Faith had with her for backup and did just so. Spike and Giles could take care of them.

Faith faced me head on with a kick to my right shoulder. I ducked under her fist and swung mine at her cheek. She turned with my punch and looped her right foot around mine knocking me to the ground. She turned to flee with the box and I grasped at her ankle, pulling her to the ground. The box skittered out of her grasp and skated to the feet of one Xander Harris who grabbed it and ran toward the van as fast as he could go. I concentrated on keeping Faith as far away from him as possible. Spike had now come up by our scrabbling side and Faith rolled away from me, facing a Slayer and a master vampire. I don’t think she liked her odds.

“This isn’t over, B,” she told me. “The Mayor is gonna kick your ass.”

“When he’s through with yours,” I answered promptly.

Faith disappeared into the night and Spike and I got everyone back to the van with the box and headed back to the library. I felt kinda good inside. For once something had gone my way. Nothing was gonna change that.

 

***

The Mayor was going over some paperwork when Faith entered his office. She came in slowly not really wanting to face this scene and the ruin of all she’d been working for these past months.

His smile faded away as he saw the look on her face.

“Where’s my box, Faith?” he asked quietly.

“Buffy,” was her simple explanation.

“You let her take it?” he said, still quiet.

“Let is hardly the word I’d use,” Faith defended.

“I used it,” he answered and suddenly pounded his fist down on the table. “They’ve got my box!” he gritted between his teeth before rising to his feet. “Well, I’m certainly disappointed in you, young lady. I thought you were up to the task. But I can see when I’m wrong.” He turned away from her and Faith clenched her jaw, ready to fight or run away and trying not to cry. He was the only one who cared about her and now she’d failed him and he’d do what he promised. He’d kill her. “And I’m still not wrong,” the Mayor finally said. “I’m finding myself strangely adverse to doing the smart thing, which is getting rid of incompetence.” Hope shot through Faith’s veins as he faced her. “You’ll just have to do better next time, Faith, and get that box back or believe me, it will be worse than a grounding for you.”

“Of course. I’m sorry, sir.” Faith let out her breath.

“I’ve been spoiling you, I think,” the Mayor told her. “But that must be my lack of judgment coming into play.”

Just then the doors to his office burst open as one of the Mayor’s vamps flew through the doors and landed on his back in the middle of the room. Drusilla strode through the doors dragging two more by the ears.

“Your toys aren’t very nice,” she informed the Mayor.

Faith immediately took a stake out of her jacket pocket and faced Drusilla. They circled each other for a few minutes before Drusilla suddenly turned around, seemingly something catching attention in her wandering brain. Faith seized her opportunity and poised the stake over Drusilla’s heart, holding her hands down with her other hand. Drusilla hissed, but held still.

“What are you waiting for?” the Mayor asked. “Kill her.”

“She can help us get the box back,” Faith said.

“Nonsense. Buffy doesn’t care a whit about her, Faith.”

“But Spike does,” Faith said firmly. “There’s no way he’d let her die if he could help it. Even if he has to betray Buffy.”

The Mayor’s face started a slow, evil smile that somehow still reminded one of a kindly uncle.

“There’s my girl,” he said proudly.

***

“Dru’s gone,” Spike said flatly.

I rolled my eyes.

“Where’d she wander off to this time?” I asked, not really caring.

“City Hall,” Spike answered shortly. I suddenly understood where this was going and there was no way I would let it end up there.

“She got herself captured? Well, isn’t that just like Crazy Lady?”

“Don’t mock this,” Spike warned me and his words were deathly quiet. “The Mayor contacted me. He’s got Dru and he wants the box.”

“Impossible,” Wesley put in. “This box is the key to the Mayor’s Ascension. Countless lives count upon it being destroyed. The research I’ve done since we acquired it clearly points to that.”

“Bollocks your research, Watcher,” Spike said dangerously. “We have to get Dru back. I’m nothing without her,” he added quietly to himself.

“You got that right,” Xander muttered.

I shot him a look.

“Xander, let me handle this. Look, Spike, I know you’re upset but we’ll get her another way.”

“There is no other way! Her life is in danger and you won’t lift a finger simply because she’s a bloody vampire.”

“It’s not like I don’t want to see them dead for a living, Spike,” I reminded him.

“Oh yeah, your word’s so valuable, ain’t it, Slayer?” he asked contemptuously. “You made a truce to help her and at the first sign that you could get out of it, you run like hell. You haven’t even been trying to help her and here I’ve been working my knickers off to help you!”

“Spike, we’ve been trying. It’s not our fault that gypsies like to curse your family.”

“No, but it’s your fault that you don’t honor your word. And you call yourself good! My demon’s got a hell of a lot more honor than your sorry ass does.”

“Spike,” Giles intervened, “please do not overreact-“

“Stay out of it,” Spike said coldly. “This is between the Slayer and me.”

“And I say,” I said firmly, “that we destroy the box and then retrieve Drusilla through some other method that doesn’t involve the possible destruction of everyone we know.”

“What method? Huh? Regale me with your mapped out plan on how to get her back without using the hunk of junk sitting on that table. You don’t have one,” Spike said bitterly. “You just figure that means the Ascension will be downsized permanently and you get out of our deal. Low, Slayer.”

I admit that had been in the back of my mind, but I would have tried to get Drusilla back. Honestly, I would have. It would’ve been only fair. But Spike’s lack of faith in me irked me beyond reason.

“Spike, I don’t think you get our little arrangement. It was that you do what I say and I figure out how to cure that insane lunatic you call- what do you call her, Spike? Is she your girlfriend? Or maybe the correct term is Undead Concubine.”

Spike punched me. I really should've been expecting that. I punched him back. He punched me again and I was about to return the favor when he shoved past me, grabbed the box and ran out of the library. I ran after him, but he banged the door in my face and I blacked out and by the time I got to the door he was gone. Looks like I was wrong when I said that nothing could change things going right.

Walking back into the library I went into Giles’ office and slammed the door. It cracked and several pictures fell off the wall but I didn’t even look at them.

I sat down slowly against the wall. I hurt all over. And not from Spike’s punches though I could feel some swelling. His words wounded me and his accusations stung. I hurt from fighting, from making hard decisions, from being the Only One. I couldn’t even stop one vamp from making away with a lousy, vitally important box of Gavrok that could stop the Mayor from doing something so big and evil that I didn’t even know what it was.

I rested my head against my knees and allowed myself exactly three tears before I prepared to get up and try and stop Spike.

The door opened and Giles walked in. I wiped my face and he came and sat down beside me. It was rather unusual for Giles to sit on the floor so I didn’t say anything.

“Let him go, Buffy,” he said finally. “Spike may be evil and not to be trusted, but he does keep his word. We can find another way to bring down the Mayor.”

“At what cost?” I finally asked.

“Great sacrifice perhaps,” he offered. “I don’t know what to tell you, Buffy. There is so much evil in this world and you’ve given all you have to fight it. But it is not Spike’s duty to fight evil, it is his nature to create it, and he does not understand such a concept as sacrifice for good.”

“Screw what he understands,” I said vehemently. “I messed up, Giles. So bad. I let him into this.”

“Spike has been a very valuable asset up to this point,” Giles reminded me.

“What good will that do if the world goes up in smoke?” I asked.

“You can only make decisions based on what you know, Buffy,” Giles told me softly. “And you knew nothing of what would occur. You are wise beyond your years but you are still young and being the Slayer does not intone perfection, you know.”

“Was that a nice way of saying I’ll always mess up?” I asked wryly.

He smiled.

“It was an effort to let you know that you cannot blame yourself for what you did not know would happen.”

“But you blame yourself,” I said, meaning something other than today’s events.

“I did know, in some measure, what the future held,” he said bitterly.

“But you did right in the end,” I said and it was hard for me to say but I meant it.

“Buffy?” he questioned.

I looked him in the eyes.

“I forgive you, Giles,” I told him. He had such an expression of open emotion like I’d never seen on him before. It felt good.

“Thank you,” he said simply.

“Don’t mention it,” I said and got up. “I’ve got to try and stop him. No matter what any of this right or wrong stuff means.”

***

Spike strolled into the Mayor’s office holding the box of Gavrok in his hands. Drusilla clapped her hands as best she could though they were tied up.

“How good of you to come and see us, Spike,” she laughed.

“I’m about ready to shut her up permanently, Spike,” Faith told him. “Hand over the box or your girlfriend belongs on an ash tray.”

“Hand over my girlfriend or the box goes back to the Scoobies,” Spike rejoined.

“Faith, play nice,” the Mayor said. He walked over to Spike and looked him up and down. “Well, Spike, you certainly are an enterprising young man and so devoted. You’ve got quite a future ahead of you, that is until I kill you. But my point is you’ve got the qualities I like to see in the young.”

“I’m older than you,” Spike pointed out.

The Mayor grinned.

“But not by much. You’ve got maybe five years on me? Doesn’t matter. Make the trade.”

Faith rose with Drusilla and tugged her over toward Spike and released her so she could grab the box.

“Now, pet,” Spike said and kicked Faith in the stomach. Drusilla broke her bonds with a quick snap of the wrists and shoved the Mayor across the room. The two vampires exited the room quickly, still holding the box and ran down the hallway.

“Einee meenie,” Drusilla chanted as they ran and then she stopped and went into an open doorway as they went past.

“Dru, we gotta move!” Spike shouted. She nodded and reappeared in the doorway clutching several items to her chest. They ran down the hall once more but their delay allowed Faith to catch up with them. Spike stopped and faced her but he couldn’t fight very well with the box in his arms.

“You’re double crossing scum,” Faith told him, fighting with the strength of desperation, knowing she had to get that box to win back her favor with the Mayor.

Spike fought back.

“I never agreed to a trade, luv,” Spike said. “Never talked to you at all actually. Just sorta showed up with a box and you came to your own conclusions. Not really my fault, you know.”

“You’re not flying out of this one,” Faith said and snap kicked the box out of Spike’s hands. He obviously knew when he needed to cut his losses and grabbing Drusilla, ran down the hallway and out the front door. Faith picked up the box and delivered it to the Mayor.

“I did pick me a winner all right,” he told her admiringly. “Now you go get some rest. I have a dinner engagement with some critters from South America.”

“Hey, bon appetite,” Faith said, not really understanding him.

“You did me proud, Faith,” he told her as she moved to leave.

“Thanks, boss,” Faith said and started to walk out of the room.

“It’s hard to believe she’s not a little girl anymore,” the Mayor said fondly as he prepared to open the box of Gavrok and consume its contents of fifty billion insects.

 

***

I couldn’t believe my eyes when Spike and Drusilla walked into the library. I had looked for them, but when I got to City Hall they’d already made the trade and left.

“You’ve got some nerve, Spike,” Xander said, “walking in here all macho and thief-like when Buffy’s looking to kill you.”

“I was looking to stop you!” I said sharply. “How could you do that, Spike? Get out of here before I do kill you.”

“She’s why I could.” He gestured to Drusilla. “And I’m not here for my seat back. I want a copy of the ritual for Dru and then I’ll be on my merry way.”

“You think for one second we’re going to give that to you when you just destroyed our hopes of bringing down the Mayor?” I asked incredulously.

“For your information, Slayer, my plan was to get Dru and keep the box as well. It just didn’t work out is all.”

“Big comfort to me, Spike,” I said as sarcastically as I could manage.

“Not my fault you couldn’t see through your blinders enough to help me. If you’d have come it would’ve worked.”

“So now it’s my fault?” I asked, outraged.

“You know as well as I do that if it had been one of your sodding little Scoobies you would’ve been at that office long before I was, giving up the box and to hell with the world.”

I flinched, wishing he didn’t know me so well. I would have and that was the only thing that was keeping me from staking him right then and there.

“You know it’s true, Slayer, so why don’t you go ahead and bare your hypocrisy to the world. Truth hurts, don’t it, luv?”

“Maybe I would’ve done it for a human,” I admitted. “But you know I couldn’t give up the world for a vampire. Not even when it was Angel. It wouldn’t be right, Spike, and you of all people need to stop lecturing me on morality.”

“Don’t call me a mosquito when I’ve been all eaten up,” Drusilla suddenly spoke up and reprimanded me.

“Shut up,” I spoke directly to her for one of the first times in ever.

“Don’t talk like that to her,” Spike warned me.

“Don’t forget, Spike,” I said, “I still have your cure. And as far as I’m concerned the truce is off so you better get ready for some big hurting.”

“Hmm, with all the innocents around too,” Spike savored the word as he spoke it.

I glanced around at my friends. There were a lot of them, and there were two very strong vampires in the room even if one of them couldn’t bite anyone at the moment.

“White light bites, but it must be strengthened in order for dark to triumph,” Drusilla said.

She moved forward sinuously and pulled out some items from her pockets.

One was a shrunken head filled with some liquid smelling strongly of alcohol. The next a silver stick with a black spire sticking out of it. The third item was several ripped out pages from a book.

I moved over to the table and picked them up cautiously keeping an eye on the vampires.

“The books of Ascension?” I questioned Drusilla after reading the titles on the pages.

“Pretty little secrets all locked away,” she answered grinning.

“You had a vision, luv?” Spike asked her, coming up close and holding her.

“Mmm, swirling memories make a playground and I needed to teach it a lesson.”

“So that’s it, you had a vision and so you went to the bloke to get it all sussed out,” Spike reasoned.

Though how there could be any reason in that I don’t know. I guess you need over a hundred years experience in crazy talk deciphering or something.

Giles and Wesley moved over eagerly to the table practically drooling over the pages. Remind me never to become a Watcher. Or a British guy.

“Wait a moment,” Giles said, picking up the head and the stick. “This is the Spire of Romany, and the head of an extinct Altoguese pygmy. Why these are the exact items needed to perform the ritual to cure her! Where did you get them?”

“Mayor’s office,” Spike supplied. “We do what we can to uphold our end,” he added with a touch of bitter irony.

“Spike,” I said, not really wanting to, but feeling the need to anyway, “we’ll uphold the truce. Will you?”

“One last time,” he said. “And then it’s curtains, Slayer.”

“Big talk,” I muttered and turned away. “Giles, Wesley, can you make anything of those papers?”

“We shall certainly try,” Giles answered while Wesley grabbed hold of them and took a magnifying glass out of his pocket to decipher more clearly. Who else but my Watcher would keep a magnifying glass in his pocket? I so have to get him a life.

“Did your vision tell you anything else, Dru?” Spike asked her.

“There will be flames and cold eyes that move with scales,” she said cryptically and then started waltzing by herself.

I rolled my eyes.

“That was a big help there,” I said.

“Just get that ritual going,” Spike demanded.

“It takes a few days to prepare fully,” Giles said. “And we do have Graduation Day coming up in a week or so. We shall need to concentrate on these pages Drusilla managed to procure if we are to be ready.”

“Concentrate all you like,” Spike growled. “Just make sure that by Graduation Day she’s ready to be cured or I’ll tear this place apart, truce or no bloody truce!” Taking Drusilla’s arms, he pulled her away from us and walked out the door.

 

***

“Are you all right, love?” Spike asked as they left. “You feeling okay? You’ve been acting way off your rocker lately, more than usual. Is it the curse doing it?”

“What do I mean?” she asked in answer.

“You mean everything,” he replied. “You’re the evening star with a spike through its heart. You’re my ripe, wicked plum. You’re the black goddess of my being. You rise up and cover the day with your beauty till it flies away shrieking.”

“The past haunts us all, Spike.” Drusilla tapped her finger on his nose and kissed him lightly. “Yours could eat you, my pretty poet. But don’t worry, I have all the olives on my fingers.”


	10. In Which There Is Hospitals and Exposition

I came in my front door and wandered into the living room and fell onto the couch. I was dead tired and almost not figuratively. I didn’t know how much longer I could keep up this pace of fighting evil before I slipped up even more than I had already. But you know what? I’m sick of moaning and groaning about it. I’ve got a destiny, yada yada, and I may as well accept it. Which works well in theory, anyway. I got up and went upstairs to take a really long shower, but the entire time in the back of my mind was one question:

What was I going to do about Faith?

***

“Faith, we need to have a little talk,” the Mayor said as she opened the door to his knock.

“This is about the box, ain’t it?” she asked apprehensively.

“Nasty business, wasn’t it?” he commented cheerfully as if nothing was wrong.

“Look, I’m sorry I screwed up. I didn’t know about them coming. I didn’t know what to do,” Faith admitted, hating her weakness.

“I know all about that, Faith,” he said. “And I didn’t come here to discuss it. I brought you a present.”

“I get a present?” Faith asked, her face lighting up. “What’s the occasion?”

“That look on your face is my reward,” he told her. “Now, you actually get two presents, but the first one’s first. This is for my Ascension.”

He handed her a gift wrapped box. Faith sat down and opened it and pulled out a dress. It was a beautiful summer dress that was her size and a perfect color on her.

“A dress? Me?” Faith asked. “Aren’t you gonna need me to fight? Dresses aren’t really me, you know?”

“Faith, you’re a beautiful young lady and being a Slayer isn’t all you are. Boys are gonna be lining up around the block for my little girl. The ones I haven’t eaten, that is.” He chuckled at the thought. “The Ascension will go smooth as cream and I want you to stand out from all the rest. Now go try it on!”

“I don’t know,” Faith said. “It’s weird.”

“Just try it on,” the Mayor said eagerly. “I want to see it.”

“Fine, you’re the boss,” she agreed and went to try it on, secretly wanting to see his reaction.

Smoothing it down in the front Faith wondered if she had the courage to go out there. It was a far cry from her usual leather pants. But she thought she looked pretty anyway. Continuing to smooth it down she gathered her muster and walked back out to face him.

His face took on a proud fatherly gaze and she blushed.

“I’m so proud of you,” he said. “You’re not perfect, no, and you can make mistakes sure as the next girl, but you’re all the Slayer any man could need or want. I wish you’d wear dresses more often. They bring out something soft in your eyes. Though, I suppose they’re not really conducive to fighting.” He chuckled again.

“Not really,” Faith said, then bitterly added, “though Buffy doesn’t seem to have much trouble with it.”

“Never you mind about Buffy,” he told her. “I’m going to eat her. Now you ready for your other present?”

 

***

When I walked into the library the next day I could tell there had been serious information gathering going on.

“The papers were a hit?” I asked.

“Indeed they were,” Wesley said excitedly. “We have almost made up for our devastating loss of the box.”

“Way to be sensitive, Wes!” I told him putting my bag on the table and hopping up on it.

“Oh, I am sorry,” Wesley said, sounding surprised. “I did mean to tell you, Buffy, that I was very pleased with the way you handled yourself. You’ve been dealing with shades of gray so often recently and I was glad to see you weren’t confused about the proper way to deal with the situation.”

“There are no proper ways to deal with situations on the Hellmouth,” I told him and turned to ask Giles.

“So, what’s the sitch then?”

“Well, we have acquired a great deal of information about what an Ascension is and the process of it.”

“And...” I prompted. The door opened and Willow and Oz walked in, holding hands.

“Hey, guys.”

“Hey,” said Oz.

“So give us the whole deal on the Ascension,” Willow said, plopping herself down in a chair and giving her avid attention to Wesley and Giles.

“Ah yes, well,” Giles began, as he always began, with British stuttering. “The pages that Drusilla acquired for us have information on what an Ascension is. It is the total transformation of a human person into a demon. But it is a true demon, not like the diluted forms we see that inhabit the earth now. The results of an Ascension are truly horrific. There aren’t very many references to them happening at all, save in the books of Ascension, but in my earlier reading...” Giles fumbled for one of his books “...there was a mention where it was written, ‘Tomorrow is the Ascension. God help us all.’ ”

“Upbeat guy,” Oz commented.

“Sounds just up our street,” I said. “He say anything else?”

“No,” Giles replied. “No one ever heard of him or his town ever again.”

“Not that it wouldn’t kill me to see Sunnydale go down in flames but at the cost of all the people, I’m gonna have to kill him instead,” I announced.

“That will be extremely hard to do,” Wesley informed me.

I hate it when he does that.

“Why?” I asked, not really wanting to know.

“Because part of the preparation for an Ascension is a ritual that transforms the do-er into a thing indestructible. The Mayor is impervious to any harm.”

“So you’re saying that I can’t stop him?”

“I’m saying that until the Ascension, you can’t. However, in the books we’ve seen a number of references to archeological excavations that have unearthed what were obviously the remains of several known true demons. The  
archeologists classified them as dinosaurs, but if what the books say is true…”

“Then the demons can be killed after they’ve completed Ascension,” I finished. “Well, comforting. And not so. It would be so much easier to kill the Mayor now rather than demon-ified. What did they use to kill the demons?”

“Well, people didn’t do it,” Wesley admitted. “One was buried underneath an eruption of a volcano. And the others were also natural disasters of some kind.”

“Great,” I said. “All we need then is a volcano. Do you think you can get those on E-bay?”

“Buffy,” Giles reassured me, “don’t overreact. I’m sure we’ll be able to think of something.”

“Sure, pep-talk me,” I told him, rolling my eyes. But in a fond way.

“So where do we go from here?” Willow asked, trying to bring us back to the real issues at hand.

“Can you two update Xander and Cordelia as to what’s going on?” I asked.

Willow nodded.

“Sure thing.”

“I’ll talk to Spike, I guess,” I said. “How’s the ritual coming?”

“It’s rather right on schedule for about Graduation time,” Giles told me. “However, since that is going to be here it might not be the best place to keep the ingredients.”

“We can probably take it to the mansion,” I said. “But that might mean you spending some time over there.”

“Well, it must be done,” Giles said.

“Giles is so stiff upper lip-y,” Willow whispered to Oz who squeezed her hand.

“Quite,” Giles said, overhearing and took off his glasses to clean them.

“In the meantime, everybody keep finding out as much as they can about the Mayor, blah blah, the usual,” I said.

Willow and Oz nodded and left for class and to tell the others what was up. I stayed behind and talked to Giles and Wesley about something.

“I’m worried about Faith,” I told them. “I don’t want her around during Graduation. She could do a lot of damage and I have enough to worry about without her as well.”

“Well, Buffy,” Giles told me, “it’s your decision, of course, but what do you plan to do about it? Faith has made her choices and the only way I can foresee to stop her would be to, to…”

“Kill her?” I supplied. “I don’t want to do that, Giles.”

“Of course you don’t.”

“Murder of a human, even one who is committing dangerous crimes,” Wesley put in, “is a very serious thing. It leads to where Faith has gone and that is not a pretty place, Buffy.”

“I know,” I said sharply. “Who knows that better than me? I could be her in different circumstances. I feel responsible for her in some ways. But I can’t let her go on hurting other people, not when I can stop her.”

“Then incapacitate her in some way that will not mortally injure her,” Wesley told me.

“I agree,” Giles said, raising his eyebrows slightly, in shock, I believe, at this admission. “If you could capture her and keep her locked up, drugged if necessary, at the proper time after the Ascension we could hand her over to-“

“Who?” I asked. “The Council? I don’t think so. Not after what they did to me and will likely do to her.”

“We’ll think of someone,” Giles assured me. “The main thing is that she is no longer in the position to harm anyone.”

“Right,” I said. “I’ll go find her.”

“Buffy,” Giles said, pleading on his face, “use the uttermost caution.”

“I always do,” I said.

***

About a week ago I had Willow finally figure out where Faith was living now. We’d tried before but we’d found her outside the home first and so abandoned the house hunting. I wanted to know so we could keep better tabs on her. But I was going there now to do way more than keep tabs on her. I was going there to - I swallowed and looked at the knife in my hand. I didn’t know what and probably wouldn’t until the heat of the battle made the decision for me. I didn’t want to think about it.

You know, it’s funny that whenever Faith does something truly terrible, I’m really mad about it, but I always keep my cool and don’t fly off the handle; but, now, when she’s actually been laying low and not hurting anyone that I know of, I was going to take her down. Her down. Faith down. Human down. I was the Slayer, not a killer. I was supposed to defeat the vampires, the demons and the forces of darkness, not the fellow Slayer that was only here because of me anyway. Faith was here because I wouldn’t die and I couldn’t save Kendra. Oh, plus all her bad choices, that too. Funny how when the moment comes to take care of someone else’s problem, the only thing you can think about is how it’s all your fault.

In I went. Faith was lying on her bed with the music blasting, flipping through a magazine. The apartment was killer. I would love to live there. But not under the same circumstances.

I flipped the music off. Faith turned around and faced me, a slow smile working up her face. I knew that smile. It meant she’d been itching for a fight and had now found one. I guess I was only too happy to oblige.

“So what’d I do this time?” she wanted to know.

“You know this is just a general thing,” I said.

“Oh, so judgment finally fell?” she realized. “Come to take me away?”

“Something along those lines. Take, drag, whichever,” I said. “I’m open.”

“Oh, you’re just full of open,” Faith agreed sarcastically. “That and yourself.”

“I can’t let you hurt anyone else,” I said simply.

“Well, I was gonna start with you anyway,” she said, moving into a fighting stance. I readjusted mine to match hers and the fight began.

It was pretty snazzy and exhilarating actually. Fighting a human with my own abilities was something I’d never encountered before. Of course fighting someone I’d once loved very dearly made me sick.

Faith did have a nice apartment for fighting though. There was big open spaces, a huge bed, lots of convenient furniture for smashing. We fought for about ten minutes and within that space of time we completely trashed the place.

Faith grabbed my arms and I struggled to make her let go. Her foot slipped on the floor and we crashed through the large window landing on the roof outside. As we landed, I slipped a handcuff on her wrist locking her in tandem with the one already around my own.

“Stick around,” I told her.

***

“I’m worried about Buffy,” Giles told Spike as he completed setting up the still finishing ritual.

“Bint can take care of herself,” Spike said, not really caring. Buffy wasn’t his favorite person at the moment.

“Yes, I know,” Giles replied. “But Faith is very dangerous and I want to make sure that she’s getting the job done without encountering any harm.”

“Fine, we’ll stroll on over to the Dark One’s and I’ll break up their little squabble.” Spike gave in. “But you gotta keep this ritual going strong.”

“Yes, it’s quite self-sustaining now,” Giles assured him. “Though I would like to get some information about the actual cursing itself.” Giles started to move out the front door and Spike followed him. “Now, were you in the actual location at the time when Drusilla was cursed?”

“No,” Spike said as they walked up Crawford Street, “we’d split up at the time…”

 

***

 

Faith and I were tugging each other around by the handcuffs, smashing into walls and looking for all the world like a pair of schizo acrobats at the circus who couldn’t remember their routine properly.

With a snap the handcuffs broke and we each flew back and smashed into the wall. She recovered first and picked up a loose brick and tossed it at my head. I narrowly dodged it and lunged for her. Closer quarters leave little room for flying objects aimed at my head. Yes, I know I’m very bright.

Faith flipped backward up to the edge of the roof. I followed her and we exchanged some more blows. She brought her leg down toward my shoulder, but I caught it and threw her onto her back, but she flipped back up and caught me in the face with both feet. I staggered backward and she grabbed something out of her pocket and brought it down in a stabbing motion. The choice was made and I pulled out my knife and swung.

We struck at the same time, me in her stomach and her in my arm. I do think that I got the better end of it though because she’d jabbed me with a needle and I’d gutted her with a knife. I felt sick.

“You did it, B.” Faith looked down with astonishment and perhaps some respect at the knife growing out of her stomach. I started to see black dots. Blackness opened wide its arms to engulf me and before I was enveloped in its hug I saw Faith pull out the knife and whisper, “I’m sorry,” before toppling over the edge of the roof and plummeting downward with her brown hair waving in the breeze.

The darkness embraced me and I didn’t see anymore.

***

“Buffy!” Giles shouted as he saw her lying out on the roof. “Buffy, can you hear me?”

“Relax, Watcher,” Spike told him. “I’ll get her.” He jumped through the window landing next to the fallen Slayer. He sniffed the air and picked her up. He glanced over the roof ledge and then returned to Giles.

“There’s no blood on her,” he told him. “But the other girl’s in the alley. Better get them both to the hospital. Slayer’s got a funny scent.” Having spilled all of his information, Spike walked away to the door, Giles hurrying after him. They picked up Faith in the alley and took them both to the hospital.

Faith was taken into intensive care immediately and after Buffy’s examination she was placed into a normal room, stabilized but completely non-responsive to anything the doctors did to wake her up. All they could find was a strange toxin in her blood and a needle prick in her arm. Spike nudged Giles into the hall.

“Gotta move it,” he said. “Mayor’ll likely show up soon and not too happy with us. I’ll stay here and keep an eye on the Slayer while you take this...” Spike pulled the empty syringe he’d found in Buffy’s arm out of his pocket and handed it to Giles “...back to the Batcave and figure out what’s going on.”

Giles looked grateful for Spike’s leading in the situation and hastened to do as he said, after casting one last glance at his pale Slayer lying in the hospital room.

 

***

 

The Mayor stood in the middle of Faith’s apartment and appraised the wrecked place with nervous thoughts.

“They crashed out here, sir,” one of his vampire lackeys said, motioning to the roof. “Someone’s blood is down in the alley. It’s Faith’s.”

“No!” the Mayor snapped. “Find her! She’s a good girl and she can take care of herself,” he told himself, desperately trying to sound convincing. His phone rang and he grabbed at it eagerly. It was the hospital.

 

***

“Slayers and poisons?” asked Wesley. “I will notify the Council immediately.”

“Excellent,” Giles told him. “They have a very reliable toxin database.”

“My thoughts exactly,” Wesley concurred. “I shall report back very soon.”

“Good man,” Giles said and Wesley hurried into the office to use the phone.

“Every book on poisons, Slayers and everything in between is out here, Giles.” Willow’s worried face hovered into his view.

“Let’s get cracking then, shall we?” Giles said. “Buffy’s life is at stake.”

Giles, Willow, Oz, Xander, and even Cordelia, sat there tirelessly looking for anything that might help them, redoubling their efforts when Spike phoned and told them that the doctors said Buffy was getting worse, breathing very shallowly and that they were unable to pick up any neural activity.

They weren’t making any head way when Wesley came back into the room looking very nervous.

“Well,” Giles asked anxiously, “were they able to find out what it was?”

“They wouldn’t help,” Wesley said reluctantly. “He hung up on me.”

“What?” Giles asked, outraged. “Their Slayer is lying in the hospital and the berks hung up on you?”

“They said,” Wesley explained, “that Buffy was too independent and that when a Slayer’s time has come it needs to be allowed to occur in order for the new Slayer to ar-“ Wesley cut off short and flinched as Giles picked up the book nearest him and threw it into the wall.

“Bloody hell!” he shouted and clenched his fist. The Scoobies looked aghast at this side of Giles they hadn’t seen before.

“I apologize, Giles,” Wesley began again. “I tried to reason with them but then he hung up on me and refuses to take my calls.”

“Who does?” Giles asked without looking at him.

“My father,” Wesley admitted.

Giles did look at him then.

“I’m sorry,” he said shortly. “I know you tried, Wesley. Don’t worry, we’ll just find it ourselves. Now help.”

“Of course,” Wesley said and hurried to the table to begin researching with the others.

 

***

I couldn’t believe it but I was actually doing the whole cliché life flashing before eyes thing. It hadn’t happened to me last time I died, but admittedly, that was rather quick.

I got to the point where Faith and I were fighting on the roof and I didn’t want to see what was going to happen next. I closed my eyes and tried to run away.

I woke up in a hospital bed. I was alone. There was no one else there. I got out of the bed and wandered through the halls. I hate hospitals. I’ve always hated them for various emotionally dragging down ways.

But I was glad that I was here. I knew that it meant I wouldn’t have to leave again. Maybe I could rest.

I came to a room and there were machines beeping inside. I went in. It was Faith.

“Back for more?” she croaked out.

I winced. She looked horrible. That was my fault.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean,” I started to say as I tried to walk away.

But Faith got to the door ahead of me. For a girl who had a gut wound she moved real quick.

“Let’s go somewhere else,” she said. “Hospitals really aren’t my thing.”

“All right,” I agreed. “How?”

“Close your eyes,” she said.

I raised an eyebrow but closed my eyes obediently.

“When did you become Wicca girl?” I asked.

“I’ve always been here,” she said and I opened my eyes. I was in my room. Faith was sitting on my bed. The window was open and the curtains flapped in the breeze.

“Do you remember...” she asked casually, leaning back on her elbows and exposing her wounded stomach “...when we found that nest of fire demons down by the beach?”

“Yes.” I smiled and walked over to sit beside her. “You nearly got yourself killed.”

“But you pulled me out,” Faith said, smirking. “I knew you could handle it.”

“You always did seem to know things,” I answered.

A knife appeared in my hands and it vanished. I got up and walked away unable to look at her.

“You couldn’t pull me out again,” she told me. “I have to do that.”

“Why wouldn’t you?” I asked quietly.

“Because I didn’t want you to see me,” she said.

“I know who you are,” I said. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.”

“I’m sorry you’re going to die,” she said. “Looks like there’s an epidemic going around.”

“I’m not,” I said and sat down on the bed again. “I can’t do this anymore, Faith. If black isn’t not white, then what is it? If you can fall, so can I. If I win, someone else comes. Can’t we rest now, Faith?”

“No,” she told me. “Not you. You’ll die, but you can’t rest. I couldn’t do it so you have to.”

“I don’t want to be the One.”

“But you are. I can see it. Don’t always like it, but I can see it.”

“Faith, I never meant…”

Faith shook her head.

“Cheers, B. I meant but doesn’t mean I meant to mean to.”

“Does that make sense?” I asked her smiling.

“Hell yeah,” she answered and shot me a grin. I felt warm. “So want some help?” she asked.

 

***

Xander was starting to feel desperate. It had been hours and they hadn’t found a cure for Buffy. She was slowly slipping away from them and if they didn’t find something soon, she would be lost to them forever. And a future without Buffy just didn’t bear thinking about. He redoubled his efforts.

“Look at this,” Oz announced to everyone. They all gathered around his and Willow’s corner and looked over their shoulder.

“Yes, it certainly has the same symptoms,” Giles agreed. “I do believe it is the very poison we are looking for.”

“Oz found it,” Willow pointed out, probably nearly deliriously happy at being able to help Buffy at last.

“We’re all well aware Oz found it, Willow,” Cordelia snapped, looking happy that the research was finally over.

Oz kissed Willow’s hand quickly and they all hurried off to the hospital.

Spike met them at the entrance.

“What’s this all about then?” he asked. “You got the cure?”

“Yes, I believe we do,” Giles answered. “We may require your assistance however.”

“For what?” Spike asked suspiciously.

“The translation here roughly states,” Wesley explained, “that in order for the strength of the strong to return, the life of the opposite must be added.”

“You need my bloody…blood?” Spike questioned. “Get some undead simpleton. I’m not donating for that bird.”

“Spike, it is imperative that we have someone who is a Master and preferably from the Line of Aurelius, which seems to be the Line that is commonly associated against Buffy.”

“So, it needs to be me,” Spike ended, “because Angel’s sodding demised and I’m letting you nowhere near Dru. Fine, stick your needles in me, but the bint had better appreciate it. Not bloody likely,” he added under his breath.

“Thank you, Spike,” Giles said. “Come with me and we’ll procure your blood and then we’ll have someone stand watch while I administer it to Buffy.”

Giles and Spike hurried to find a secluded area, Giles drawing a syringe from his pocket as he did so. The rest went to see Buffy in her hospital room.

Xander and Willow went inside, while Oz, Cordelia and Wesley stood in awkward silence outside the door. Well, at least Wesley was awkward.

While they stood there, they heard someone crying around the corner. Cordelia, always anxious to know anything about anyone, peered around it and then snapped her head back to whisper,

“It’s the Mayor! He’s crying!”

“Faith,” Oz stated.

“Most probably, yes,” Wesley agreed. “I do believe there was a modicum of real affection in their relationship from what I’ve observed.”

“Watch out, he’s coming!” Cordelia hissed. They all tried to look nonchalant. Oz won. Wesley lost.

The Mayor rounded the corner and spotted them, then stopped.

“Where is she?” he asked sharply. “I’m going to kill her.”

“Who are you killing today?” Cordelia asked in a bored tone. “So long as it’s not me anyway.”

“Where is the Slayer who tried to kill my little girl?” His voice rose to a shout at the end.

“You can’t have her,” Oz said quietly.

“Indeed you cannot.” Wesley puffed himself up. “You will not be allowed to harm her.”

“Then you’ll have to stop me,” the Mayor said and started to push past them. The three of them hung onto him while Wesley shouted for help. Several orderlies came running around the corner.

“He’s trying to hurt her,” Wesley said hysterically.

The orderlies pulled the Mayor away.

“Sir, you need to calm down,” they told him as they dragged him down the hall.

“This is far from over,” the Mayor shouted back at the three and at Willow and Xander who were standing just inside the door. “You’re going to wish you had let me kill her.”

“Uh, he's insane,” Xander said nervously.

“No duh,” Cordelia told him, her tone sarcastic, but affectionate.

Giles and Spike drew near and everyone except Spike went inside to administer his blood to Buffy.

Everyone crowded around the bed and held their breath as Giles slowly depressed the plunger, pushing Spike’s blood into Buffy’s veins.

 

***

 

I woke up. Everyone was standing around me and then started wearing ridiculous grins and hugging each other and hugging me. I wondered briefly for a moment if it was my birthday, but then I remembered if that had been the case, everyone would be running and screaming and crying.

“What’s with the big celebration?” I asked, sitting up, wincing as I felt a little weak, but strangely empowered. Maybe there was some kind of big drug in my system.

“Buffy, we got you back!” Willow squealed. “You’re not going to die!”

“Well, that’s good news anyway,” I answered. It was all coming back to me now. I hate it when it does that. “Let me get dressed and then we’ll go back to the library and make up a game plan,” I said.

Everyone shooed out of the room and I stood there for a long moment, remembering Faith. Remembering the fight. Remembering what she’d told me. Remembering how peaceful it had felt to be with her. Remembering that now I had to go and fight. Again.

I got dressed and then went to see her. She lay, very pale, very comatose. Slowly I bent down and kissed her forehead. Then I straightened up. It was time to end this.


	11. In Which Do You Really Think I’m Going to Give Away the Ending?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Character death. Skip to the next chapter to avoid this ending!

Willow sighed as she flipped through the book on her bed. Trying to research something no one had ever written about was hard. She had decided that for sure. So far during this whole Ascension thing her main concern had been for Buffy and how they were going to deal with Faith. It hadn’t really occurred to her that maybe high school was going to end, not with a big speech and a 4.0 GPA, but in death and blood and horror and maybe her life would be over. That wasn’t something Willow looked forward to.

Oz sat at her computer flipping through websites that might be of help. There weren’t any.

“There’s nothing here,” she said and slammed the book shut. “Unless we want to communicate with ferns.”

“Our lives are different than other people’s,” Oz observed, turning around to face her.

A wave of frustration swept over Willow. Oz was a person she admired and largely because of his calm demeanor   
and ability to keep a level head. But right now, when she was feeling panicked, his lack of concern was ticking her   
off.

“Aren’t you scared even just a little bit?” she asked wildly. “Our lives could end tomorrow and you don’t even   
look like it matters at all. There are so many things I want to do. There’re so many things I wanted to share with   
you. All the books I’ve never read. And now I might be dead and never able to do them and you just sit there like it   
doesn’t matter.”

“Would it help you if I panicked?” he asked.

“Yes!” she exclaimed. “I just want to know I’m not alone!”

Oz sat for a moment and seemed to wonder how he could show her that she wasn’t alone and that he was just as concerned about dying as she was. Then he lunged forward and she found out.

***

The Mayor had them take the video equipment out of his office and called all his vampires in.

“Today is the day,” he told them with a bright smile. Though Faith was lost to him for the moment, his   
Ascension would carry on, on schedule, and he would kill every last person who had ever hurt her.

“Now you boys will be around mostly for perimeter upkeep,” he told them. “Feeding is essential in the first   
few moments after the transformation so you need to keep the kids from running off. No snacking though or it’s a trip   
to the woodshed for you.” He laughed a little. “Wood shed. Do you get it?” The vampires stared at him. The Mayor   
just shook his head and added his last guideline, “And, fellas, let’s watch the language.”

The vampires looked at each other, obviously mystified, and they all raised their hands to ask questions. The Mayor sighed, looked like he was going to be there for awhile.

***

I called everyone to the library. We needed to have a plan before Graduation Day. Oh yeah, which was tomorrow.   
Willow and Oz arrived, acting way more lovey dovey than usual. Well, Willow was. It’s hard to tell when Oz is doing anything more than usual. And considering that Willow is usually gushy over Oz, her renewed energy devoted to that particular cause was saying something.

Xander and Cordelia arrived, she was snapping at him and he was staring at her chest. Typical.

Spike and Drusilla arrived, probably fresh from some sort of evil activity that I did not want to know about. Drusilla looked quite well to my eyes and their PDA had apparently reached an all time high. I’m at the point where I’m going to order everyone who knows me to be single for the rest of their lives.

Wesley and Giles were already there all poised and with British reserve. I was thankful for them and their   
stoicism at that moment.

It must have been the stress of the last few weeks, but I’d turned into a completely different person and I didn’t like it. I wanted my carefree, lollipop sucking days back. Secretly, I thought this is why Slayers die before their eighteenth birthday. So they don’t turn into absolute, stone cold, emotionless zombies.

Shocked silence greeted my plan. But I was used to that.

“Uh, Buff?” Xander asked. “That’s kinda wild.”

“Can you get the stuff?” I asked him.

“Oh yeah, that’s no biggie,” he said. “But I’m more concerned about the whole craziness of the execution part.”

“Do you have anything better to suggest?” I asked.

“No,” he admitted.

“Look, guys,” I said, preparing for my big speech part of the apocalypse. Actually I was up all night. You   
don’t think I’m this long-winded naturally, do you? “I know this sounds ridiculous. But I know what I’m doing. This   
is the only way we can possibly defeat the Mayor. It will be dangerous and I’m not saying that there won’t be losses.   
But if that’s what it takes than we have to do it. This is the only way I can see for us to survive. And I want to   
get through high school and defeat the Mayor just as much as you do. It’s my job to protect you guys and I know that   
sometimes it doesn’t seem like I’ll make it, but I’m doing my best. I’m asking you once more to put your trust in me.   
Faith told me how this would work and I think it will.”

“Was that before or after you put her in a coma?” Willow asked hesitantly.

“After,” I explained in my best rational voice.

“Oh.” Willow sat back in her chair.

“Cause taking advice from a psycho, evil girl in a coma is always the sanest course of action,” Cordelia   
commented.

“If you guys don’t like the plan then I think you should go, you should leave town. I want you to be safe.”

“We’re staying, Buffy,” Willow assured me.

“All of us,” Xander said.

Cordelia glared at him, but sighed in assent.

“So how do those who explode in sunlight fit into the little plan, Slayer?” Spike spoke up.

At least he was asking a legitimate question and not bothering me for the heck of it.

“Well, I don’t really know,” I admitted, squirming a little.

“I believe we can help with that,” Wesley said, preening a bit.

The guy’s got a little ways to go still.

“What’s that then?” Spike asked, putting his feet on the table whereupon Giles frowned deeply.

“The Books of Ascension do mention that at the time of the transformation, darkness will cover the land and   
evil ones will be able to run free without fear of cost and they will be drawn to the power of the true demon. We   
believe that an eclipse of the sun will occur, allowing you and Drusilla, Spike, to be quite helpful.”

“Cheers all around,” Spike said sarcastically.

I ignored him and spoke to everyone else.

“Do you all know what to do then?”

“We got it already,” Cordelia said.

“Then go do it,” I said.

And the work began.

 

***

I was in the library with Giles doing a lot of packing up. He turned to me and almost started pouting.

“Buffy, are you absolutely certain that we can’t take it all?”

“Sorry, Giles, but in this case, not everything must go.”

“It’s just rather ironic, this whole situation, isn’t it?” he continued. I nodded, the man had a point.   
“Wesley should be back soon,” he said. “We can carry on from there. You should go home and rest, spend some time with   
your mother.”

“I will,” I agreed. “But I wanted to tell you something first, Giles.”

“Yes?” he asked. I stopped working and leant against the wooden railings.

“I’m not going to work for the Council anymore,” I told him, not looking at him. After all this might be the   
equivalent of telling him I hated all his kind.

“I can’t say I’m much surprised,” he said.

I looked at him, me surprised.

“Why not? I mean, aren’t you always telling me it’s my sacred duty and all and that the rules are there for my   
protection?”

“The Council has betrayed your trust on several points this year alone,” Giles admitted. “Even those closest   
to you were involved. I do not blame you at all for not wanting anything to do with them. And speaking, so to say,   
from the other side, not working for the Council is rather exhilarating.”

He smiled at me and I smiled back.

“I’ll let you know how it works out,” I said then looked away. “It’s just, Giles, they’re supposed to be my   
guides and then they poison me and set me up and then they stand there willing to let me die. I can’t deal with that   
anymore.”

“Yes, well, as I said, I do not blame you. Though Wesley will be crushed.”

I laughed.

“Yes, poor Wes. You know when he came here, I mostly accepted him because I was still upset with you.”

“Yes, I know.”

“But he grows on you and while I think he’s really way too prissy for words, I believe a lot of it has to do   
with situation and now that he’s away from the mother influence he’s gonna get better.”

“I do concur,” Giles agreed. “I happen to know a lot of his background, from years in the Council as well as   
the check I ran on him upon his arrival, and, Buffy, it is quite likely I am more like him than I care to admit and   
that only circumstances have saved me from his current state.”

“Well, I think that on the whole I’ve been rather lucky with my Watchers,” I said. “Way more so than Faith   
anyway.”

“Quite.” Giles chuckled. “Now you run on home and get some rest before tomorrow.”

“I will,” I said. “Goodnight, Giles.”

“Goodnight, Buffy.”

***

Faith lay in the hospital bed with machines whirring and beeping all around, the only indication that she was still alive. The Mayor watched her from the doorway. The doctors had just told him that it was unlikely that she would ever wake up. Only her sheer force of will could do that and seeing as how her will was unconscious that opportunity seemed doomed to never appear.

“But my girl’s a fighter,” he whispered to himself and then to her. “Faith, I know you can wake up. I know   
you have the willpower and strength to do it. In my mind, Faith, you’re like one of the Titans. A little on the shady   
side sure, but full of strength and fight and sheer determination. Maybe the other side can chain you to a hospital   
bed, but there are no chains that you can’t break. I’m going to Ascend soon and no matter how long it takes there’ll   
always be a place for you at my side. I will eat every person in this town, but this hospital will stand, solely for my little girl.”

The Mayor leaned down and kissed Faith on the forehead.

***

I walked into my house. My mom wasn’t home, which I liked. I’d rather not have to explain what I was doing until it was over. I walked up to her bedroom and stared for a moment at the picture hanging in the hallway. It was of me and her lying on my bed. We looked so happy and carefree together. I loved that picture. But at the moment I felt about eighty years old. Too old. I took it down and brought it into her room where I got out a suitcase and started pulling out her stuff to pack it.

Just my luck she walked in when I was halfway through. She stopped in the doorway and adjusted her earring   
while asking quirkily,

“If you’re planning on running away, shouldn’t you be packing your things?”

“I’m not running away, Mom,” I assured her dryly. “But you are.”

“And what did I do this time?” she asked coming into the room and stopping my packing.

“Mom, tomorrow is going to be huge. And I don’t know if I can stop it or not. I have to know that you’ll be   
safe, so I want you to leave Sunnydale until I come and get you.”

“Buffy! Don’t be silly. I wouldn’t miss your graduation! What on earth are you talking about?”

I sighed. I knew this would be hard. I told her a little bit about the Mayor and what was supposed to   
happen. Her eyes grew wide, but her chin firmed into an expression of stubbornness. Like mother, like daughter.

“Buffy, if something bad is going to happen then I want to stay here with you. What if something happened to   
you?”

“You can’t save me,” I told her. “And the best thing you can do for me is be far away. I love you, Mom. And   
I can’t fight my best knowing that you could be in danger. Please do this for me.”

“But I worry about you,” she said.

I walked over to her and hugged her.

“I worry about you too. That’s why I’m doing this. Mom, my life is supposed to be dangerous but that doesn’t   
mean yours should be too.”

“I’m not sure that makes sense,” she said and hugged me tightly.

I reciprocated and we stood that way for a little while.

“I want your solemn word that you’ll get a hold of me the minute you know you’re safe,” she said.

“I promise you I will,” I said.

“Then scat and let me finish my own packing,” she told me, smiling.

I grinned at her and tossed a picture of a certain mask onto the suitcase that I’d found while packing her   
stuff.

“Don’t forget to take your zombie mask with you,” I teased.

“Get out of here!” She tossed a pillow at me and I went to my room, smiling for one of the few times I had in   
the last while.

***

Dawn: Graduation Day.

Willow woke up in the circle of Oz’s arms and relaxed for awhile, knowing she might not know this peace ever again. Here she was safe and whole and here she wanted to stay.

Oz tightened his grip on her, willing the moment to never end. He knew only that Willow was everything to him and that   
she was his main reason for holding onto his humanity.

Cordelia jerked awake, wondering why there was something sticking into her back. Looking back she saw that it   
was the gearshift of her car and then she remembered that she and Xander had driven to the point to watch the sun set.   
They must have fallen asleep, but now the sun’s rays were just hovering over the horizon. She turned to wake up   
Xander, but she couldn’t do it. He looked so peaceful lying there with the sun playing over his face. She laid down   
again cuddling his chest and he unconsciously put his arm around her. Cordelia watched the sun rise.

Wesley jerked awake from a frightening dream. His heart racing, he sat up in bed and gulped down some water.   
With slow realization he remembered he was in Sunnydale about to face the most terrifying day of his life and knowing   
that, for once, he was doing it on his own and he was right where he was supposed to be.

Giles turned off the teakettle and put down the book he had been perusing. There were many to choose from as   
he gazed at the various piles scattered all around his apartment. He spotted one of his favorites and settled down for   
a quick read with a pot of his favorite tea before the adventures of the day began.

The Mayor straightened up from the night vigil he’d held at Faith’s hospital bed. He had to leave her now. It   
was the biggest day of his life and he had to leave the one person he wanted to share it with lying in the hospital.   
But he would do it for her and know that she would be with him again. He just knew it.

Spike broke the necks of about ten teenagers he’d brought for his and Drusilla’s breakfast. He wanted to make   
sure they were both up to speed and that Drusilla had all the strength she would need for the upcoming battle. She   
came into the room and clapped her hands when she saw all the bodies, but she bypassed them and came up to Spike and   
whispered in his ear.

“Remember my kiss, William?”

“Every day,” he whispered back.

***

I woke up and stared at the ceiling. Today was the day. Getting out of bed, I noticed a small parcel on my dresser. My mom must have put it there. I smiled. Sly thing, she never said a word. I opened it and saw it contained a cell phone. Sure, she probably just wanted to get a hold of me on patrol, but it was really shiny looking!  
I met everyone in the library. There were a few last minute chores we needed to accomplish before the big finish. I sent Willow, Oz, Jonathan and Larry to go unload Oz’s van full of the stuff Xander had acquired the night before.

Xander was out talking to people and looking at the weaponry we had. I kept Cordelia, Wesley and Giles setting   
up stuff in the library. Spike and Drusilla were hiding out in Giles’ office, probably doing gross things I never want   
to think about.

 

***

I was sitting in my assigned seat and I was listening to the Mayor drone on and on, thinking that he might just be the most evil thing in the universe to make us listen to him like this, but, thankfully, before he finished, something happened.

The sun grew dark. The Mayor started to squirm and groan and I enjoyed that part. But then his skin split   
open and a giant snake thing grew out of the remains. That part was less fun.

Principal Snyder started screaming about how this was his school and he did not tolerate that kind of   
behavior. The Mayor Snake ate him. For a moment I almost contemplated letting him eat some other people before I   
killed him, but that wouldn’t be a good thing to do so I didn’t. Good triumphs yet again. I looked at Xander across   
the platform and nodded, he nodded back and jumped onto his chair, shouting,

“Now!”

All across the platform students ripped off their gowns and revealed a pretty dang cool arsenal hiding on their   
person. We may not be friends, but we sure as heck aren’t going to let this snake thing ruin our graduation and then   
eat us to boot!

Larry and I wielded flamethrowers in the front while countless arrows rained over our heads at the Mayor   
Snake. I could hear Xander shouting orders. Dimly, I heard Oz shout something about vampires in the rear.

Risking a glimpse behind me I saw vampires coming up to keep the students from running, but I also saw behind   
them Spike, Drusilla, Wesley and more students to keep them from running. I grinned. So far the plan was working   
great. Oz and his part of the student body shot flaming arrows into the oncoming vampires. Willow and Cordelia handled   
the left side of the graduating class and Xander the right.

But the Mayor Snake was freaking huge and hungry and there was no way we could hold our ground for long. To my   
right I saw Larry being whipped out from under himself and I heard the sickening crack as he fell. I looked to Xander   
again and nodded once more.

I threw down my flamethrower and heard him yell,

“Hand to hand, everyone.”

The students grabbed stakes and knives and axes out of their belts and turned to face the oncoming vampires who   
were already battling Spike’s team.

“Buffy.” Willow grabbed my hand from behind.

“Willow, go!” I shouted.

She took off, but I heard her call back to me.

“Good luck, Buffy. Be careful!”

Xander jumped down off the chair and ran with the rest and then it was just me and the Mayor Snake.

Funny how it always comes down to the two of us, me and the Big Bad.

“Hey!” I shouted and held up the knife I’d used to gut Faith. “Remember me? I’m the one who coma-fied your   
little psycho. With this knife in fact, slid into her like butter. You want it, come and get it.”

And I ran.

 

***

The battle between the students and the vampires raged on. Spike saw students go down left and right, but even more vampires were exploding into dust everywhere he looked.

Cordelia ran past him and plunged her stake into a vamp’s heart and then was in danger of getting killed as she   
exalted over the fact, but Xander jumped down the steps and tackled the vamp sneaking up on her.

Willow and Oz were fighting back to back, and Spike didn’t think they’d be in any trouble. He was more worried   
about Drusilla, but as he looked at her he saw that the breakfast he’d gotten for her was doing its job and she’d be   
able to last until the end. Wesley had been knocked down twice, but he was still fighting.

A blonde girl went down to one side of him and a scrawny, nerdy looking boy jumped onto the vamp chewing on her   
neck.

“Anytime now, Slayer,” Spike said, bored already.

 

***

I ran into the school, past the lounge, past the cafeteria, past Mr. Gregson’s old science classroom, past the bathroom, past the gym, past Snyder’s office, past the vending machines and into the library.

I could hear walls smashing and roofs tumbling behind me. I leapt over the wooden railings and through the   
stacks and out the exit, landing beside Giles in the bushes in an ungraceful heap. Um, I mean graceful heap.

“Now,” I told him unnecessarily.

Giles depressed the plunger and one of the biggest explosions I’d ever seen encompassed Sunnydale High. The   
palm trees outside the school incinerated as they caught fire from the plumes of flames that rolled out over the school   
in waves. Funny how that happens when you put flammable explosives inside the school library.

“It’s over,” Giles breathed out beside me.

“Yup,” I agreed. “I graduated and with only one expulsion too.”

“I’m very proud of you,” Giles said and handed me my diploma. “I took the liberty of extracting yours and the   
others’ before the ceremony.”

“Thank you, Giles,” I said, deeply moved. I mean, only Giles would’ve thought of protecting proof of academia   
in such a situation.

 

***

Giles and I met everybody at the front of the former Sunnydale High where Wesley was being loaded into an ambulance. He was the only one of our group who had sustained any serious damage and that damage was only a mild concussion and sprained wrist. Willow has some pretty scary looking cuts on her face and Xander and Cordelia looked pretty bruised but they were going to be okay. Neither Spike nor Drusilla nor I had a mark on us. Oh, the benefits of preternatural strength and quick healing.

Wesley insisted between squeals of agony that he would be fine and home in the morning and the EMT working on   
him agreed.

Giles went with him to the hospital and Spike and Drusilla quickly disappeared before the sun came back, after   
we had told them we would be at the mansion that evening to cure Drusilla.

Willow, Oz, Xander, Cordelia and I sat on a bench and watched the school finish its last day as the fire slowly   
burned out and the weakened timbers collapsed. We survived Sunnydale High. I’m thinking of getting a t-shirt made.

 

***

Giles sat beside Wesley in his hospital room.

“I am getting to be quite tired of this place, actually,” Wesley admitted.

“Yes, I am as well,” Giles agreed. “I have many distasteful memories here.”

“I’m sure that you have,” Wesley said. “In just my short stay here so many vile and unprecedented things have   
happened that I cannot imagine what a longer space of time would hold.”

“You’ve been given an interesting view on the world, Wesley,” Giles told him. “One that not many Watchers are   
allowed.”

“I have been realizing that,” Wesley said dryly. “Life isn’t what I was told it was.”

“I wouldn’t forget that if I were you,” Giles said. Wesley smiled and a comfortable silence enveloped them   
before Giles spoke up, a tad hesitantly. “I need to tell you something, Wesley, that you may not like.”

“Buffy wants to fire me, doesn’t she?” Wesley said in saddened but accepting-of-the-inevitable tone.

“No, Buffy is not unhappy with you, but with the Council in general,” Giles explained. “And she is not   
prepared to work for them any longer. Therefore, she will not be needing a Watcher, at least in an official capacity   
at any rate.”

“I’ve been sacked, but not because of my actions,” Wesley put together, seemingly not wholly unpleased with   
such a premise.

“Exactly,” Giles said. “I know this presents some difficulties for you.”

“Quite,” Wesley said, looking like he was giving himself a headache trying to think what he was going to do now.

“I want you to come and work with me,” Giles told him and held up his hand at Wesley’s exclamation of   
surprise. “I don’t quite know what I’m going to be doing with my life, but my own employment has been terminated today   
and I thought we could come up with something together. I’m not really doing this out of pity either, you’ve proven   
yourself almost perfectly capable and no one has ever been in doubt of your scholarly capabilities. I believe you will   
be a valuable asset.”

“Thank you, Mr. Giles,” Wesley said, sounding a little shock shook. “I believe I will accept your generous   
offer.”

“It is simply Giles from now on,” Giles told him. “Or Rupert if you like, but I don’t like being compared to some old sod sitting around in England.”

“All right,” Wesley agreed. “I’ll never compare you to an old sod. Just perhaps a youngish one.”

Giles shot him a glance and Wesley smiled at him, which Giles soon returned. They were off to a good start.

***

It felt very weird and eerie and yet strangely cool and mystical as we converged upon the mansion that night. The last time such a ritual had been performed in there was that day with Acathla. Don’t like to think about that so much though, so let’s forget it. But the mansion did seem to play its part of evil ritual location to perfection with the stone tiles laid on the floor and the marble carvings of the walls. I felt like we should be in a horror film, but then it occurred to me that my life is a horror film. A cheesy one sometimes, but horror nonetheless.

“Took you long enough, Slayer,” Spike drawled as he and Drusilla got up from the couches where they’d been   
lounging. Whoever said there was no rest for the wicked obviously didn’t know Spike.

“Well, seems like Giles blew up his last supply of essence of toad,” I explained. “And we all knew how   
important this ritual is,” I added sarcastically.

“Buffy,” Giles asked me in sotto, “are we sure we want to enable Drusilla to go back to her murdering ways?”

“No, we’re not,” I said. “But I made a deal and I won’t go back on it.”

“Nice choice, pet,” Spike said, obviously hearing everything.

Nothing’s a secret around the undead.

“I did make sure that only you and I were here though, didn’t I?” I asked Giles. “If something happens we can   
work it out.”

“Something always happens,” Drusilla said to herself in glee.

I flinched a little but tossed the toad bag to Giles.

“Let’s just do the spell, okay?”

“I will set it up,” Giles said.

Spike, Drusilla and I stood around in silence for awhile. I mean, how do you make casual small talk with a   
vampire who’s crazy and who wants to kill you? It’s just not done, trust me.

Giles marked out a space on the floor for Drusilla to stand and placed several candles at strategic points   
around the room to better convey energy or something like that.

Spike and I moved all the couches out of the way and we waited a bit, because the ritual had to start at   
midnight in order for it to work properly.

Giles started the incense flowing at about 11:45, and, boy, was it smelly. I could hardly breathe. Spike just   
stood there with his smug, not needing to breathe-ness! Stupid vampire. Anyway, Drusilla stood in her appointed spot   
dressed in the Goth version of Vogue’s latest fashion.

Giles opened the cauldron where gross things had been stirring for the past several days. He added the toad   
and an evil smell started pouring out of it.

He started muttering something in what must be Gypsy-ese because I sure didn’t understand it. Drusilla started   
to tremble and Spike to twitch.

“Choice has been made,” Giles intoned seriously. I wanted to giggle, but restrained myself. “Blood has been   
paid. What was taken now be received.”

Drusilla put out her hands.

Giles poured the evil looking contents into the eviler looking shrunken head and spoke some more things I   
didn’t understand. Honestly, evil rituals are boring, I don’t see the intrigue.

“Blood of the Childe to renew the Sire.”

Spike stepped forward. Giles took the silver stick thing and spiked his proffered wrist with it. I thought   
that was incredibly ironic myself. Blood gushed out of the wound and into the shrunken head.

Giles mixed it with some complex mixing pattern described in one of his books, but to be honest he just looked   
like one of the chefs on TV with the boring food prep shows.

Spike stepped back dealing with his wound. Giles stepped up to Drusilla who could barely contain herself at   
this point. He dipped his finger in the moisture and placed some on her forehead. It seemed to melt into her skin.   
Then he placed some on her right hand and it too dissipated into her. Then he spoke again.

“May the hold be broken and the blood be thickened and may the teeth know their joy in payment of debt, now and   
forever.”

Drusilla took the head from him and drank the rest of the potion. I resisted the urge to heave. I mean, talk   
about ewwwww.

There was a flash of light and an orange glow appeared around Drusilla and pulsed, brighter and brighter until   
it gave a pop and vanished in a ray of sparks.

“So mote it be,” Giles said, I believe, effectively, ending the ritual.

I took out a stake, just in case.

Spike sprang to Drusilla and anxiously took her hands.

“Are you all right, love? Ready to resume carnage?”

“Oh yes, Spike,” Drusilla said, lifting up her head and flashing her exotically mesmerizing eyes my way. “We   
shall break light’s hold and you will be mine forever!”

“I’ve always been yours,” he said, nuzzling her neck. “Always will be.”

“Do you remember your promise?” she asked.

He straightened up and turned to me. I braced myself.

“I remember, pet.” He sauntered toward me and I brought my stake up but he just laughed at me. Stupid vampire   
again. “The truce, it’s over,” he said.

“Kinda figured,” I answered. “Giles, get out of here.”

“Oh, no need to worry, Slayer,” Spike said. “We’re not going to fight now. I’m going to take Drusilla out for   
awhile, but next time I see you, tomorrow or ten years from now, I will kill you like I promised her.”

“Whatever, Spike,” I said. “I think you should leave town now.”

“Don’t worry, my little ray of sunshine,” he said. “Don’t want to hang around this bloody popsicle stand.   
We’ll be gone and you’ll be dead.”

“Come on, Giles,” I said and we left.

I walked him home. I wanted everybody in their vampire free houses till whatever Spike had planned had gone   
down. I had a feeling he would come after me though, even if it was just to not do what Angel had done. I had already   
had Willow revoke his invitation to my house.

“Giles,” I asked after some time, “what did you mean when you said all that about choices being made and blood   
paid?”

“Well,” Giles said, “it’s part of the ritual, but I believe that from what I read and what I could discern from   
Spike about the cursing that Drusilla might have done this to herself.”

“What?” I asked. “I mean, I know she’s crazy, but this seems too border line even for her!”

“I am aware of that but I am almost positive as to that being the facts of the situation. The why would be   
something only she could answer and even then…”

“Answers only lead to more questions,” I finished.

We reached Giles’ apartment and I watched him go inside and then went home myself. I had called my mom earlier   
and she said she would be home soon. I wanted her to stay away until after the Spike-Buffy showdown and she said she   
would. Now I could sleep, but not without having to worry about something else. A Slayer’s life is not boring, let’s say.

***

Maybe it wasn’t the wisest choice I ever made but I was poking around in the ruins of the school after dark. Mayor meat still lay smoking and the smell was disgusting. But I was looking for Mr. Pointy; I think I left him in my locker. Another bad choice on my part. I was really racking them up.

I heard a noise from behind me. Noises from behind me late at night really didn’t scare me anymore. This   
noise was not a creepy stalking through bushes noise though; it was an old car screeching to a stop noise. I turned   
around.

A DeSoto was parking across the street just on top of the old sign denoting the location of Sunnydale High.   
Figures Spike doesn’t know how to brake properly. British punk music poured out of the window and then he stepped   
outside, cigarette glowing in his mouth. Drusilla’s giggle could be heard from inside.

“Hello, cutie,” he said with the smoke pouring out of his mouth.

Oh, he was going for effect all over the place. I sighed and whipped out my stake from my belt band.

“You couldn’t just leave, could you?” I asked him.

Spike stalked toward me slowly, ditching the cigarette along the way.

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“Why don’t you just let me stake you and get it over with?” I asked, advancing toward him.

“Because today I’m going to have me a real good day,” he answered. “Let’s dance, Slayer.”

And he lunged toward me.

I’d like to say that I side stepped him and plunged the stake through his heart on his way past me, but that   
didn’t happen.

Instead we fought. As epic battles go, it probably wasn’t very exhilarating. As strategy goes, we probably   
weren’t very brilliant. As far as skill and strength goes, we were pretty evenly matched. We’d both fought for a long   
time and had time to hone ourselves and we’d fought each other enough to be aware of some weaknesses that could be   
exploited.

But it was fun in a way. I was tired of fighting and I wanted nothing better than to run away to my house and   
stop caring about being the Slayer. I could see what it did to people. You either died and the darkness won or the   
darkness overcame you and it won as in Faith’s case, or like me you made deals with it to stay away from you or you   
fell in love with it or you simply would not lay down and die. I had reasons to live and that’s why I kept fighting.   
But that never meant I wasn’t tired to death.

Which made fighting with Spike so fun. Because with him, it was almost more like sparring, or as he put it,   
like dancing. We barely ever touched each other as we pranced our way around the ruins covering the literal mouth of   
Hell.

“Why can’t you kill me, Spike?” I ground out, blocking his attack. “You keep on trying and failing   
miserably.”

Spike grinned a little and grabbed my wrist before it smashed into his nose.

“If we’re gonna talk about failures, pet, how come you’ve never dusted me so I don’t come back and try to kill   
you?”

I glared at him and renewed my attack. I was going to kill him this time, dang it!

Spike circled away for a minute and I caught my breath and then I swung out my arm which he blocked and then he   
punched at me and I grabbed his arm, he grabbed my other one in return and turned us both underneath our attached arms   
and kneed me in the stomach. Struggling for my breath I caught his leg and pushed it away from me, but using that   
momentum, he spun around and used that same leg to kick me in the back. I flipped backwards and obliged him with the   
same and then used my other leg to kick his front. He caught my leg though and threw me on my back, but on my way   
down, I jerked his leg down too. We fell and I rolled to get away from him. But instead of rolling away himself, he   
rolled with me and when I got back to my knees his teeth were in my neck.

I cried out in pain and shock as his arms gripped mine to keep me from moving, though I struggled for a few   
minutes until the sensations rolling over me stopped me from doing anything but focusing on them. The sucking and   
pulling hurt so much that I couldn’t stand it, but at the same time there was such a relieving feeling as I gave of   
myself and knew it would be the last thing I would ever do so. Here I would rest. Here I would never have to worry   
again and here, I wanted to stay. The sensations stopped and I closed my eyes as much from loss as relief. I opened   
them again to see Spike, the demon, looking down at me with immense satisfaction on his face.

“You-you did it,” I said.

He grinned.

“By a hair, luv, by a hair. Hat’s off to you though, pet. The greatest Slayer of my acquaintance.”

“Means nothing coming from you,” I murmured, drowsy with blood loss. Spike smiled again. I liked his   
smile. It was so, so fun.

“Anything you wanna say, last chance, Slayer.”

“I-I love th-“

 

***

Spike watched Buffy’s eyes close and knew they would not open again. He could feel her heart slowing and he lowered his face to her neck and tasted again the sweet abundance of her blood that would be gone when he was finished.

For once in his unlife, Spike kept something from Drusilla and did not leave any blood for her. Buffy was his   
and he wanted to wholly consume her. There would be nothing left for any other evil to say that they had a part of   
her. Even those who had shared in her previously, they would have nothing. Spike took it all.

Gently, he gathered Buffy’s lifeless body in his arms and carried her back to the car. He would drop her off   
at her house and let her friends find her there, looking as peaceful as he could contrive. He knew Buffy at least as   
well as they did and he knew she wasn’t really sorry this had happened. It was high time someone had let the girl   
rest. And now Spike was truly the Slayer of Slayers, he had kept his honor and pride and title and he had proven his   
love for his wicked Princess.

“At last the light has gone out and my own is all mine,” Drusilla said in an awestruck tone upon viewing the   
body. “I knew how it would be and all the pain that poured in will now belong to others. Spike, we’ll be one forever.”

“Even so, love,” he agreed, laying Buffy down in the backseat.

Drusilla joined him and he closed his arms about her tightly.

“Spike,” Drusilla said, “you know it was only right to do it.”

“I’ve no qualms about killing the Slayer, Dru,” Spike said. “I never have.”

“But you would have, someday,” she answered. “I could see her. She wanted to float all over you and take you away from me.”

“But she can never do it. You’re all I’ll ever bloody want or need,” Spike reassured her.

Drusilla nodded knowingly.

“The moon told me how and I obeyed. Now we’ll be one forever.”

Spike didn’t quite know what to make of that, but he was all for the last sentence.  
“Let’s go ravage the world, Dru!” Spike said in an excited tone.

Drusilla’s eyes lit up and she started to dance. Spike laughed as he watched her. And then they left Sunnydale behind together.


	12. Alternate Version: In Which Do You Really Think I’m Going to Give Away the Ending?

Willow sighed as she flipped through the book on her bed. Trying to research something no one had ever written about was hard. She had decided that for sure. So far during this whole Ascension thing her main concern had been for Buffy and how they were going to deal with Faith. It hadn’t really occurred to her that maybe high school was going to end, not with a big speech and a 4.0 GPA, but in death and blood and horror and maybe her life would be over. That wasn’t something Willow looked forward to.

Oz sat at her computer flipping through websites that might be of help. There weren’t any.

“There’s nothing here,” she said and slammed the book shut. “Unless we want to communicate with ferns.”

“Our lives are different than other people’s,” Oz observed, turning around to face her.

A wave of frustration swept over Willow. Oz was a person she admired and largely because of his calm demeanor   
and ability to keep a level head. But right now, when she was feeling panicked, his lack of concern was ticking her   
off.

“Aren’t you scared even just a little bit?” she asked wildly. “Our lives could end tomorrow and you don’t even   
look like it matters at all. There are so many things I want to do. There’re so many things I wanted to share with   
you. All the books I’ve never read. And now I might be dead and never able to do them and you just sit there like it   
doesn’t matter.”

“Would it help you if I panicked?” he asked.

“Yes!” she exclaimed. “I just want to know I’m not alone!”

Oz sat for a moment and seemed to wonder how he could show her that she wasn’t alone and that he was just as   
concerned about dying as she was. Then he lunged forward and she found out.

***

The Mayor had them take the video equipment out of his office and called all his vampires in.

“Today is the day,” he told them with a bright smile. Though Faith was lost to him for the moment, his Ascension would carry on, on schedule, and he would kill every last person who had ever hurt her.

“Now you boys will be around mostly for perimeter upkeep,” he told them. “Feeding is essential in the first   
few moments after the transformation so you need to keep the kids from running off. No snacking though or it’s a trip to the woodshed for you.” He laughed a little. “Wood shed. Do you get it?” The vampires stared at him. The Mayor just shook his head and added his last guideline, “And, fellas, let’s watch the language.”

The vampires looked at each other, obviously mystified, and they all raised their hands to ask questions. The Mayor sighed, looked like he was going to be there for awhile.

***

I called everyone to the library. We needed to have a plan before Graduation Day. Oh yeah, which was tomorrow.   
Willow and Oz arrived, acting way more lovey dovey than usual. Well, Willow was. It’s hard to tell when Oz is doing anything more than usual. And considering that Willow is usually gushy over Oz, her renewed energy devoted to that particular cause was saying something.

Xander and Cordelia arrived, she was snapping at him and he was staring at her chest. Typical.

Spike and Drusilla arrived, probably fresh from some sort of evil activity that I did not want to know about.   
Drusilla looked quite well to my eyes and their PDA had apparently reached an all time high. I’m at the point where   
I’m going to order everyone who knows me to be single for the rest of their lives.

Wesley and Giles were already there all poised and with British reserve. I was thankful for them and their   
stoicism at that moment.

It must have been the stress of the last few weeks, but I’d turned into a completely different person and I   
didn’t like it. I wanted my carefree, lollipop sucking days back. Secretly, I thought this is why Slayers die before   
their eighteenth birthday. So they don’t turn into absolute, stone cold, emotionless zombies.

Shocked silence greeted my plan. But I was used to that.

“Uh, Buff?” Xander asked. “That’s kinda wild.”

“Can you get the stuff?” I asked him.

“Oh yeah, that’s no biggie,” he said. “But I’m more concerned about the whole craziness of the execution part.”

“Do you have anything better to suggest?” I asked.

“No,” he admitted.

“Look, guys,” I said, preparing for my big speech part of the apocalypse. Actually I was up all night. You   
don’t think I’m this long-winded naturally, do you? “I know this sounds ridiculous. But I know what I’m doing. This   
is the only way we can possibly defeat the Mayor. It will be dangerous and I’m not saying that there won’t be losses.   
But if that’s what it takes than we have to do it. This is the only way I can see for us to survive. And I want to   
get through high school and defeat the Mayor just as much as you do. It’s my job to protect you guys and I know that   
sometimes it doesn’t seem like I’ll make it, but I’m doing my best. I’m asking you once more to put your trust in me.   
Faith told me how this would work and I think it will.”

“Was that before or after you put her in a coma?” Willow asked hesitantly.

“After,” I explained in my best rational voice.

“Oh.” Willow sat back in her chair.

“Cause taking advice from a psycho, evil girl in a coma is always the sanest course of action,” Cordelia   
commented.

“If you guys don’t like the plan then I think you should go, you should leave town. I want you to be safe.”

“We’re staying, Buffy,” Willow assured me.

“All of us,” Xander said.

Cordelia glared at him, but sighed in assent.

“So how do those who explode in sunlight fit into the little plan, Slayer?” Spike spoke up.

At least he was asking a legitimate question and not bothering me for the heck of it.

“Well, I don’t really know,” I admitted, squirming a little.

“I believe we can help with that,” Wesley said, preening a bit.

The guy’s got a little ways to go still.

“What’s that then?” Spike asked, putting his feet on the table whereupon Giles frowned deeply.

“The Books of Ascension do mention that at the time of the transformation, darkness will cover the land and   
evil ones will be able to run free without fear of cost and they will be drawn to the power of the true demon. We   
believe that an eclipse of the sun will occur, allowing you and Drusilla, Spike, to be quite helpful.”

“Cheers all around,” Spike said sarcastically.

I ignored him and spoke to everyone else.

“Do you all know what to do then?”

“We got it already,” Cordelia said.

“Then go do it,” I said.

And the work began.

 

***

I was in the library with Giles doing a lot of packing up. He turned to me and almost started pouting.

“Buffy, are you absolutely certain that we can’t take it all?”

“Sorry, Giles, but in this case, not everything must go.”

“It’s just rather ironic, this whole situation, isn’t it?” he continued. I nodded, the man had a point.   
“Wesley should be back soon,” he said. “We can carry on from there. You should go home and rest, spend some time with   
your mother.”

“I will,” I agreed. “But I wanted to tell you something first, Giles.”

“Yes?” he asked. I stopped working and leant against the wooden railings.

“I’m not going to work for the Council anymore,” I told him, not looking at him. After all this might be the   
equivalent of telling him I hated all his kind.

“I can’t say I’m much surprised,” he said.

I looked at him, me surprised.

“Why not? I mean, aren’t you always telling me it’s my sacred duty and all and that the rules are there for my   
protection?”

“The Council has betrayed your trust on several points this year alone,” Giles admitted. “Even those closest   
to you were involved. I do not blame you at all for not wanting anything to do with them. And speaking, so to say,   
from the other side, not working for the Council is rather exhilarating.”

He smiled at me and I smiled back.

“I’ll let you know how it works out,” I said then looked away. “It’s just, Giles, they’re supposed to be my   
guides and then they poison me and set me up and then they stand there willing to let me die. I can’t deal with that   
anymore.”

“Yes, well, as I said, I do not blame you. Though Wesley will be crushed.”

I laughed.

“Yes, poor Wes. You know when he came here, I mostly accepted him because I was still upset with you.”

“Yes, I know.”

“But he grows on you and while I think he’s really way too prissy for words, I believe a lot of it has to do   
with situation and now that he’s away from the mother influence he’s gonna get better.”

“I do concur,” Giles agreed. “I happen to know a lot of his background, from years in the Council as well as   
the check I ran on him upon his arrival, and, Buffy, it is quite likely I am more like him than I care to admit and   
that only circumstances have saved me from his current state.”

“Well, I think that on the whole I’ve been rather lucky with my Watchers,” I said. “Way more so than Faith   
anyway.”

“Quite.” Giles chuckled. “Now you run on home and get some rest before tomorrow.”

“I will,” I said. “Goodnight, Giles.”

“Goodnight, Buffy.”

 

***

Faith lay in the hospital bed with machines whirring and beeping all around, the only indication that she was still alive. The Mayor watched her from the doorway. The doctors had just told him that it was unlikely that she would ever wake up. Only her sheer force of will could do that and seeing as how her will was unconscious that opportunity seemed doomed to never appear.

“But my girl’s a fighter,” he whispered to himself and then to her. “Faith, I know you can wake up. I know you have the willpower and strength to do it. In my mind, Faith, you’re like one of the Titans. A little on the shady side sure, but full of strength and fight and sheer determination. Maybe the other side can chain you to a hospital bed, but there are no chains that you can’t break. I’m going to Ascend soon and no matter how long it takes there’ll always be a place for you at my side. I will eat every person in this town, but this hospital will stand, solely for my little girl.”

The Mayor leaned down and kissed Faith on the forehead.

***

I walked into my house. My mom wasn’t home, which I liked. I’d rather not have to explain what I was doing until it was over. I walked up to her bedroom and stared for a moment at the picture hanging in the hallway. It was of me and her lying on my bed. We looked so happy and carefree together. I loved that picture. But at the moment I felt about eighty years old. Too old. I took it down and brought it into her room where I got out a suitcase and started pulling out her stuff to pack it.

Just my luck she walked in when I was halfway through. She stopped in the doorway and adjusted her earring   
while asking quirkily,

“If you’re planning on running away, shouldn’t you be packing your things?”

“I’m not running away, Mom,” I assured her dryly. “But you are.”

“And what did I do this time?” she asked coming into the room and stopping my packing.

“Mom, tomorrow is going to be huge. And I don’t know if I can stop it or not. I have to know that you’ll be   
safe, so I want you to leave Sunnydale until I come and get you.”

“Buffy! Don’t be silly. I wouldn’t miss your graduation! What on earth are you talking about?”

I sighed. I knew this would be hard. I told her a little bit about the Mayor and what was supposed to   
happen. Her eyes grew wide, but her chin firmed into an expression of stubbornness. Like mother, like daughter.

“Buffy, if something bad is going to happen then I want to stay here with you. What if something happened to   
you?”

“You can’t save me,” I told her. “And the best thing you can do for me is be far away. I love you, Mom. And   
I can’t fight my best knowing that you could be in danger. Please do this for me.”

“But I worry about you,” she said.

I walked over to her and hugged her.

“I worry about you too. That’s why I’m doing this. Mom, my life is supposed to be dangerous but that doesn’t   
mean yours should be too.”

“I’m not sure that makes sense,” she said and hugged me tightly.

I reciprocated and we stood that way for a little while.

“I want your solemn word that you’ll get a hold of me the minute you know you’re safe,” she said.

“I promise you I will,” I said.

“Then scat and let me finish my own packing,” she told me, smiling.

I grinned at her and tossed a picture of a certain mask onto the suitcase that I’d found while packing her stuff.

“Don’t forget to take your zombie mask with you,” I teased.

“Get out of here!” She tossed a pillow at me and I went to my room, smiling for one of the few times I had in   
the last while.

***

Dawn: Graduation Day.

Willow woke up in the circle of Oz’s arms and relaxed for awhile, knowing she might not know this peace ever again. Here she was safe and whole and here she wanted to stay.

Oz tightened his grip on her, willing the moment to never end. He knew only that Willow was everything to him and that   
she was his main reason for holding onto his humanity.

Cordelia jerked awake, wondering why there was something sticking into her back. Looking back she saw that it   
was the gearshift of her car and then she remembered that she and Xander had driven to the point to watch the sun set.   
They must have fallen asleep, but now the sun’s rays were just hovering over the horizon. She turned to wake up   
Xander, but she couldn’t do it. He looked so peaceful lying there with the sun playing over his face. She laid down   
again cuddling his chest and he unconsciously put his arm around her. Cordelia watched the sun rise.

Wesley jerked awake from a frightening dream. His heart racing, he sat up in bed and gulped down some water.   
With slow realization he remembered he was in Sunnydale about to face the most terrifying day of his life and knowing   
that, for once, he was doing it on his own and he was right where he was supposed to be.

Giles turned off the teakettle and put down the book he had been perusing. There were many to choose from as   
he gazed at the various piles scattered all around his apartment. He spotted one of his favorites and settled down for   
a quick read with a pot of his favorite tea before the adventures of the day began.

The Mayor straightened up from the night vigil he’d held at Faith’s hospital bed. He had to leave her now. It   
was the biggest day of his life and he had to leave the one person he wanted to share it with lying in the hospital.   
But he would do it for her and know that she would be with him again. He just knew it.

Spike broke the necks of about ten teenagers he’d brought for his and Drusilla’s breakfast. He wanted to make   
sure they were both up to speed and that Drusilla had all the strength she would need for the upcoming battle. She   
came into the room and clapped her hands when she saw all the bodies, but she bypassed them and came up to Spike and   
whispered in his ear.

“Remember my kiss, William?”

“Every day,” he whispered back.

***

I woke up and stared at the ceiling. Today was the day. Getting out of bed, I noticed a small parcel on my dresser. My mom must have put it there. I smiled. Sly thing, never said a word.  
I met everyone in the library. There were a few last minute chores we needed to accomplish before the big finish. I sent Willow, Oz, Jonathan and Larry to go unload Oz’s van full of the stuff Xander had acquired the night before.

Xander was out talking to people and looking at the weaponry we had. I kept Cordelia, Wesley and Giles setting   
up stuff in the library. Spike and Drusilla were hiding out in Giles’ office, probably doing gross things I never want   
to think about.

***

I was sitting in my assigned seat and I was listening to the Mayor drone on and on, thinking that he might just be the most evil thing in the universe to make us listen to him like this, but, thankfully, before he finished, something happened.

The sun grew dark. The Mayor started to squirm and groan and I enjoyed that part. But then his skin split   
open and a giant snake thing grew out of the remains. That part was less fun.

Principal Snyder started screaming about how this was his school and he did not tolerate that kind of   
behavior. The Mayor Snake ate him. For a moment I almost contemplated letting him eat some other people before I   
killed him, but that wouldn’t be a good thing to do so I didn’t. Good triumphs yet again. I looked at Xander across   
the platform and nodded, he nodded back and jumped onto his chair, shouting,

“Now!”

All across the platform students ripped off their gowns and revealed a pretty dang cool arsenal hiding on their   
person. We may not be friends, but we sure as heck aren’t going to let this snake thing ruin our graduation and then   
eat us to boot!

Larry and I wielded flamethrowers in the front while countless arrows rained over our heads at the Mayor   
Snake. I could hear Xander shouting orders. Dimly, I heard Oz shout something about vampires in the rear.

Risking a glimpse behind me I saw vampires coming up to keep the students from running, but I also saw behind   
them Spike, Drusilla, Wesley and more students to keep them from running. I grinned. So far the plan was working   
great. Oz and his part of the student body shot flaming arrows into the oncoming vampires. Willow and Cordelia handled   
the left side of the graduating class and Xander the right.

But the Mayor Snake was freaking huge and hungry and there was no way we could hold our ground for long. To my   
right I saw Larry being whipped out from under himself and I heard the sickening crack as he fell. I looked to Xander   
again and nodded once more.

I threw down my flamethrower and heard him yell,

“Hand to hand, everyone.”

The students grabbed stakes and knives and axes out of their belts and turned to face the oncoming vampires who   
were already battling Spike’s team.

“Buffy.” Willow grabbed my hand from behind.

“Willow, go!” I shouted.

She took off, but I heard her call back to me.

“Good luck, Buffy. Be careful!”

Xander jumped down off the chair and ran with the rest and then it was just me and the Mayor Snake.

Funny how it always comes down to the two of us, me and the Big Bad.

“Hey!” I shouted and held up the knife I’d used to gut Faith. “Remember me? I’m the one who coma-fied your   
little psycho. With this knife in fact, slid into her like butter. You want it, come and get it.”

And I ran.

***

The battle between the students and the vampires raged on. Spike saw students go down left and right, but even more vampires were exploding into dust everywhere he looked.

Cordelia ran past him and plunged her stake into a vamp’s heart and then was in danger of getting killed as she   
exalted over the fact, but Xander jumped down the steps and tackled the vamp sneaking up on her.

Willow and Oz were fighting back to back, and Spike didn’t think they’d be in any trouble. He was more worried   
about Drusilla, but as he looked at her he saw that the breakfast he’d gotten for her was doing its job and she’d be   
able to last until the end. Wesley had been knocked down twice, but he was still fighting.

A blonde girl went down to one side of him and a scrawny, nerdy looking boy jumped onto the vamp chewing on her   
neck.

“Anytime now, Slayer,” Spike said, bored already.

***

I ran into the school, past the lounge, past the cafeteria, past Mr. Gregson’s old science classroom, past the bathroom, past the gym, past Snyder’s office, past the vending machines and into the library.

I could hear walls smashing and roofs tumbling behind me. I leapt over the wooden railings and through the   
stacks and out the exit, landing beside Giles in the bushes in an ungraceful heap. Um, I mean graceful heap.

“Now,” I told him unnecessarily.

Giles depressed the plunger and one of the biggest explosions I’d ever seen encompassed Sunnydale High. The   
palm trees outside the school incinerated as they caught fire from the plumes of flames that rolled out over the school   
in waves. Funny how that happens when you put flammable explosives inside the school library.

“It’s over,” Giles breathed out beside me.

“Yup,” I agreed. “I graduated and with only one expulsion too.”

“I’m very proud of you,” Giles said and handed me my diploma. “I took the liberty of extracting yours and the   
others’ before the ceremony.”

“Thank you, Giles,” I said, deeply moved. I mean, only Giles would’ve thought of protecting proof of academia in such a situation.

***

Giles and I met everybody at the front of the former Sunnydale High where Wesley was being loaded into an ambulance. He was the only one of our group who had sustained any serious damage and that damage was only a mild concussion and sprained wrist. Willow has some pretty scary looking cuts on her face and Xander and Cordelia looked pretty bruised but they were going to be okay. Neither Spike nor Drusilla nor I had a mark on us. Oh, the benefits of preternatural strength and quick healing.

Wesley insisted between squeals of agony that he would be fine and home in the morning and the EMT working on him agreed.

Giles went with him to the hospital and Spike and Drusilla quickly disappeared before the sun came back, after we had told them we would be at the mansion that evening to cure Drusilla.

Willow, Oz, Xander, Cordelia and I sat on a bench and watched the school finish its last day as the fire slowly burned out and the weakened timbers collapsed. We survived Sunnydale High. I’m thinking of getting a t-shirt made.

***

Giles sat beside Wesley in his hospital room.

“I am getting to be quite tired of this place, actually,” Wesley admitted.

“Yes, I am as well,” Giles agreed. “I have many distasteful memories here.”

“I’m sure that you have,” Wesley said. “In just my short stay here so many vile and unprecedented things have   
happened that I cannot imagine what a longer space of time would hold.”

“You’ve been given an interesting view on the world, Wesley,” Giles told him. “One that not many Watchers are   
allowed.”

“I have been realizing that,” Wesley said dryly. “Life isn’t what I was told it was.”

“I wouldn’t forget that if I were you,” Giles said. Wesley smiled and a comfortable silence enveloped them   
before Giles spoke up, a tad hesitantly. “I need to tell you something, Wesley, that you may not like.”

“Buffy wants to fire me, doesn’t she?” Wesley said in saddened but accepting-of-the-inevitable tone.

“No, Buffy is not unhappy with you, but with the Council in general,” Giles explained. “And she is not   
prepared to work for them any longer. Therefore, she will not be needing a Watcher, at least in an official capacity   
at any rate.”

“I’ve been sacked, but not because of my actions,” Wesley put together, seemingly not wholly unpleased with   
such a premise.

“Exactly,” Giles said. “I know this presents some difficulties for you.”

“Quite,” Wesley said, looking like he was giving himself a headache trying to think what he was going to do now.

“I want you to come and work with me,” Giles told him and held up his hand at Wesley’s exclamation of   
surprise. “I don’t quite know what I’m going to be doing with my life, but my own employment has been terminated today   
and I thought we could come up with something together. I’m not really doing this out of pity either, you’ve proven   
yourself almost perfectly capable and no one has ever been in doubt of your scholarly capabilities. I believe you will   
be a valuable asset.”

“Thank you, Mr. Giles,” Wesley said, sounding a little shock shook. “I believe I will accept your generous   
offer.”

“It is simply Giles from now on,” Giles told him. “Or Rupert if you like, but I don’t like being compared to   
some old sod sitting around in England.”

“All right,” Wesley agreed. “I’ll never compare you to an old sod. Just perhaps a youngish one.”

Giles shot him a glance and Wesley smiled at him, which Giles soon returned. They were off to a good start.

***

It felt very weird and eerie and yet strangely cool and mystical as we converged upon the mansion that night. The last time such a ritual had been performed in there was that day with Acathla. Don’t like to think about that so much though, so let’s forget it. But the mansion did seem to play its part of evil ritual location to perfection with the stone tiles laid on the floor and the marble carvings of the walls. I felt like we should be in a horror film, but then it occurred to me that my life is a horror film. A cheesy one sometimes, but horror nonetheless.

“Took you long enough, Slayer,” Spike drawled as he and Drusilla got up from the couches where they’d been   
lounging. Whoever said there was no rest for the wicked obviously didn’t know Spike.

“Well, seems like Giles blew up his last supply of essence of toad,” I explained. “And we all knew how   
important this ritual is,” I added sarcastically.

“Buffy,” Giles asked me in sotto, “are we sure we want to enable Drusilla to go back to her murdering ways?”

“No, we’re not,” I said. “But I made a deal and I won’t go back on it.”

“Nice choice, pet,” Spike said, obviously hearing everything.

Nothing’s a secret around the undead.

“I did make sure that only you and I were here though, didn’t I?” I asked Giles. “If something happens we can   
work it out.”

“Something always happens,” Drusilla said to herself in glee.

I flinched a little but tossed the toad bag to Giles.

“Let’s just do the spell, okay?”

“I will set it up,” Giles said.

Spike, Drusilla and I stood around in silence for awhile. I mean, how do you make casual small talk with a   
vampire who’s crazy and who wants to kill you? It’s just not done, trust me.

Giles marked out a space on the floor for Drusilla to stand and placed several candles at strategic points   
around the room to better convey energy or something like that.

Spike and I moved all the couches out of the way and we waited a bit, because the ritual had to start at   
midnight in order for it to work properly.

Giles started the incense flowing at about 11:45, and, boy, was it smelly. I could hardly breathe. Spike just   
stood there with his smug, not needing to breathe-ness! Stupid vampire. Anyway, Drusilla stood in her appointed spot   
dressed in the Goth version of Vogue’s latest fashion.

Giles opened the cauldron where gross things had been stirring for the past several days. He added the toad   
and an evil smell started pouring out of it.

He started muttering something in what must be Gypsy-ese because I sure didn’t understand it. Drusilla started   
to tremble and Spike to twitch.

“Choice has been made,” Giles intoned seriously. I wanted to giggle, but restrained myself. “Blood has been   
paid. What was taken now be received.”

Drusilla put out her hands.

Giles poured the evil looking contents into the eviler looking shrunken head and spoke some more things I didn’t understand. Honestly, evil rituals are boring, I don’t see the intrigue.

“Blood of the Childe to renew the Sire.”

Spike stepped forward. Giles took the silver stick thing and spiked his proffered wrist with it. I thought   
that was incredibly ironic myself. Blood gushed out of the wound and into the shrunken head.

Giles mixed it with some complex mixing pattern described in one of his books, but to be honest he just looked   
like one of the chefs on TV with the boring food prep shows.

Spike stepped back dealing with his wound. Giles stepped up to Drusilla who could barely contain herself at   
this point. He dipped his finger in the moisture and placed some on her forehead. It seemed to melt into her skin.   
Then he placed some on her right hand and it too dissipated into her. Then he spoke again.

“May the hold be broken and the blood be thickened and may the teeth know their joy in payment of debt, now and   
forever.”

Drusilla took the head from him and drank the rest of the potion. I resisted the urge to heave. I mean, talk   
about ewwwww.

There was a flash of light and an orange glow appeared around Drusilla and pulsed, brighter and brighter until   
it gave a pop and vanished in a ray of sparks.

“So mote it be,” Giles said, I believe, effectively, ending the ritual.

I took out a stake, just in case.

Spike sprang to Drusilla and anxiously took her hands.

“Are you all right, love? Ready to resume carnage?”

“Oh yes, Spike,” Drusilla said, lifting up her head and flashing her exotically mesmerizing eyes my way. “We   
shall break light’s hold and you will be mine forever!”

“I’ve always been yours,” he said, nuzzling her neck. “Always will be.”

“Do you remember your promise?” she asked.

He straightened up and turned to me. I braced myself.

“I remember, pet.” He sauntered toward me and I brought my stake up but he just laughed at me. Stupid vampire   
again. “The truce, it’s over,” he said.

“Kinda figured,” I answered. “Giles, get out of here.”

“Oh, no need to worry, Slayer,” Spike said. “We’re not going to fight now. I’m going to take Drusilla out for   
awhile, but next time I see you, tomorrow or ten years from now, I will kill you like I promised her.”

“Whatever, Spike,” I said. “I think you should leave town now.”

“Don’t worry, my little ray of sunshine,” he said. “Don’t want to hang around this bloody popsicle stand.   
We’ll be gone and you’ll be dead.”

“Come on, Giles,” I said and we left.

I walked him home. I wanted everybody in their vampire free houses till whatever Spike had planned had gone   
down. I had a feeling he would come after me though, even if it was just to not do what Angel had done. I had already   
had Willow revoke his invitation to my house.

“Giles,” I asked after some time, “what did you mean when you said all that about choices being made and blood   
paid?”

“Well,” Giles said, “it’s part of the ritual, but I believe that from what I read and what I could discern from   
Spike about the cursing that Drusilla might have done this to herself.”

“What?” I asked. “I mean, I know she’s crazy, but this seems too border line even for her!”

“I am aware of that but I am almost positive as to that being the facts of the situation. The why would be   
something only she could answer and even then…”

“Answers only lead to more questions,” I finished.

We reached Giles’ apartment and I watched him go inside and then went home myself. I had called my mom earlier   
and she said she would be home soon. I wanted her to stay away until after the Spike-Buffy showdown and she said she would. Now I could sleep, but not without having to worry about something else. A Slayer’s life is not boring, let’s say.

 

***

Maybe it wasn’t the wisest choice I ever made but I was poking around in the ruins of the school after dark. Mayor meat still lay smoking and the smell was disgusting. But I was looking for Mr. Pointy; I think I left him in my locker. Another bad choice on my part. I’m really racking them up lately.

I heard a noise from behind me. Noises from behind me late at night really don’t scare me anymore. This noise   
was not a creepy stalking through bushes noise though; it was an old car screeching to a stop noise. I turned around.

A DeSoto was parking across the street just on top of the old sign denoting the location of Sunnydale High.   
Figures Spike doesn’t know how to brake properly. British punk music poured out of the window and then he stepped   
outside, cigarette glowing in his mouth. Drusilla’s giggle could be heard from inside.

“Hello, cutie,” he said with the smoke pouring out of his mouth.

Oh he was going for effect all over the place. I sighed and whipped out my stake from my belt band.

“You couldn’t just leave, could you?” I asked him.

Spike stalked toward me slowly, ditching the cigarette along the way.

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“Why don’t you just let me stake you and get it over with?” I asked, advancing toward him.

“Because today I’m going to have me a real good day,” he answered. “Let’s dance, Slayer.”

And he lunged toward me.

I’d like to say that I side stepped him and plunged the stake through his heart on his way past me, but that   
didn’t happen.

Instead we fought. As epic battles go, it probably wasn’t very exhilarating. As for strategy, we probably   
weren’t very brilliant. As far as skill and strength went, we were pretty evenly matched. We’d both fought for a long   
time and had time to hone ourselves and we’d fought each other enough to be aware of some weaknesses that could be   
exploited.

But it was fun in a way. I was tired of fighting and I wanted nothing better than to run away to my house and   
stop caring about being the Slayer. I could see what it did to people. You either died and the darkness won or the   
darkness overcame you and it won, as in Faith’s case; or like me, you made deals with it to stay away from you or you   
fell in love with it or you simply would not lay down and die. I had reasons to live and that’s why I kept fighting.   
But that never meant I wasn’t tired to death.

Which made fighting with Spike so fun. Because with him, it was almost more like sparring, or as he put it,   
like dancing. We barely ever touched each other as we pranced our way around the ruins covering the literal mouth of   
Hell.

“Why can’t you kill me, Spike?” I ground out, blocking his attack. “You keep on trying and failing   
miserably.”

Spike grinned a little and grabbed my wrist before it smashed into his nose.

“If we’re gonna talk about failures, pet; how come you’ve never dusted me so I don’t come back and try to kill   
you?”

I glared at him and renewed my attack. I was going to kill him this time, dang it!

Spike circled away for a minute and I caught my breath and then I swung out my arm which he blocked and then he   
punched at me and I grabbed his arm, he grabbed mine in return and turned us both underneath our attached arms and   
kneed me in the stomach. Struggling for my breath I caught his leg and pushed it away from me, but using that   
momentum, he spun around and used that same leg to kick me in the back. I flipped backwards and obliged him with the   
same and then used my other leg to kick his front. He caught my leg though and threw me on my back, but on my way   
down, I jerked his leg down too. We fell and I rolled to get away from him. But instead of rolling away himself, he   
rolled with me and when I got back to my knees my own stake was growing out of my stomach. Irony of all ironies,   
considering Faith and all, and the fact that it was the Slayer who had the stake poking out of her.

I fell forward and blacked out for a moment. Blood seemed to pour out in a river down my body as I pulled the   
stake out. I felt cold and thoughts rushed through my brain. Maybe I shouldn’t have done that. Where was Spike?   
Where was I?

“Quite a sight you are, luv,” Spike said from somewhere above me.

I glared in what I thought was his general direction.

“You gonna talk or kill me?” I asked.

“Maybe both,” he answered. “But the mighty Slayer down on her knees is something to be cherished, not   
squandered, pet.”

“You’re a pig, Spike,” I blurted out the familiar refrain for lack of anything better to say. Give me a break,   
though, my mind wasn’t exactly working that well at the moment.

Spike grinned. Then he knelt down and looked me in the face.

“I’m not going to kill you. Truth is, I like having you as the Slayer. You’ve your own ideas about things and   
you know how to change. I don’t want the dance to end so soon. Plus, this is a lot of fun. I think we’ll have to do   
it again next year.”

“Can’t wait,” I muttered, trying to stay conscious.

“See you around, Slayer.” Spike walked away.

I pulled the new cell phone my mom had given me out of my pocket and dialed 911. Then I called Giles. Then I blacked   
out for good.

***

Spike and Drusilla roared past the Sunnydale city limits in companionable silence. Drusilla had been strangely okay with the whole not actually killing Buffy thing. Just the smell of her blood on Spike’s hands had been enough to satisfy her. His explanation about wanting to know that he could beat her again when she was at her peak was strangely fitting to Drusilla and the mixed motives in her brain spoke to her that all would yet be what it should be in time.

In the meantime, they had each other and that was all either of them had ever really wanted. Spike put his arm around her possessively and she bit it affectionately.

***

I woke up in the hospital. Again. I felt incredibly well, though thoroughly sick of the place. There was a note by my bedside and it read,

‘Buffy,

We’ve gone home to get some sleep. The doctors say you’ll be fine. We’ve called your mom and she’s on her way   
home. She says she loves you. Call us when you wake up. We love you.’

And it was signed by Giles, Willow, Xander, Oz, Wesley, and even Cordelia. It was obviously written by Willow   
though; there were little hearts and flowers all over the page. There was also a big bouquet of roses. I sighed, you   
know, it wasn’t that bad being the Slayer with all this to come home to.

I got up and winced at the pain, but it was hardly enough to keep me here. I got dressed carefully, but I   
didn’t go home yet. I went to Faith’s room and closed the door behind me. I may be the Slayer, but she was my sister   
and I owed the victory over the apocalypse to her. Maybe someday she’d forgive me and I could forgive her and we could   
go on from there. Till then I would sit with her so she’d know she wasn’t alone. After all, I wasn’t alone.


End file.
